XLII -RANT
I havn't posted in awhile. basicly that means I'm going to rant....
1) What made me so terrable? You stayed with all your other girlfriends, even when they cheat on you over and over, leave you for someone els, and send you horrable pictures so it won't be so bad to leave you... yet all I do is miss you, and get sad when you ditch out on plans with me... and you leave me... I don't understand what I did... was I just your ego-boost? your way out of feeling like you're not good enough? your experiment to see if you could break someone els after you've been broken? I feel used, lied to, shit on. What makes me feel worse is I STILL miss you, I still love you and I still want you. I just want to know what made me so different...
2) I'm tired of people saying I'm weird... sure it's funny to them, or they don't mean it, but after hearing it over and over in different ways I just can't stand it anymore... yea I can be awkward in some situations... and I ussually apologize, but I try so hard to be like everyone els I guess it's just not working. I hear it, and I just turn inwerds, I think of what I say, and maybe it sounds differently then what it should... but, I'm not odd, weird, awkward ect... I can't put a lot of what I say or think into words and sometimes I make a fool of myself... but my God... I'm trying.
3) there's so much more i want to write but at the moment i have no energy or drive to do so.
1) What made me so terrable? You stayed with all your other girlfriends, even when they cheat on you over and over, leave you for someone els, and send you horrable pictures so it won't be so bad to leave you... yet all I do is miss you, and get sad when you ditch out on plans with me... and you leave me... I don't understand what I did... was I just your ego-boost? your way out of feeling like you're not good enough? your experiment to see if you could break someone els after you've been broken? I feel used, lied to, shit on. What makes me feel worse is I STILL miss you, I still love you and I still want you. I just want to know what made me so different...
2) I'm tired of people saying I'm weird... sure it's funny to them, or they don't mean it, but after hearing it over and over in different ways I just can't stand it anymore... yea I can be awkward in some situations... and I ussually apologize, but I try so hard to be like everyone els I guess it's just not working. I hear it, and I just turn inwerds, I think of what I say, and maybe it sounds differently then what it should... but, I'm not odd, weird, awkward ect... I can't put a lot of what I say or think into words and sometimes I make a fool of myself... but my God... I'm trying.
3) there's so much more i want to write but at the moment i have no energy or drive to do so.