whirl wind ....
So things have been hectic to say the least....
I AM ENGAGED!!!
I pick up my ring on friday as they didn't do my size, its perfect just what i wanted, we went shopping yday and it was the first one i seen and we kept looking around but i went back to that shop and like i say i pick it up on friday!....
Kev is adorable, so loving, kind, caring....and he is moving in!
My family are so happy for me and above all i am happy.
we have booked a holiday, 2 weeks in the sun, we are going to lanzorote....big prob is since i am on a CTO they have rules etc, they have said i have to gain 6kg in 4 weeks, i have to be 35kg to go. I am shitting it, anorexia is still a big problem but i am going to give it a go. I am 29kg now so here comes weight gain. which fucking scares me.
Today i have docs etc then im taking mam out for lunch, i will have veg and some chicken. I have not attempted to eat a 'meal' since i left the unit but it should be ok and kev will be back in from work at 5 so he said i need to try eat some more before i start my feed at 8pm.
i am so scared about weight gain etc but i know i need too and i know above all i have the support at home.
but apart from having a terrible week food wise life is brilliant and i have met the man of my dreams and accepted him into my life...i wont let him down on the holiday side of things...but im heading for a very hard few weeks and i have told him not to expect me to be happy i will cry i will want to not do it but he said he is not leaving my side and he is going to be there through it all.
im so happy and in love, anorexia is just still so strong and here comes the hard work...
I AM ENGAGED!!!
I pick up my ring on friday as they didn't do my size, its perfect just what i wanted, we went shopping yday and it was the first one i seen and we kept looking around but i went back to that shop and like i say i pick it up on friday!....
Kev is adorable, so loving, kind, caring....and he is moving in!
My family are so happy for me and above all i am happy.
we have booked a holiday, 2 weeks in the sun, we are going to lanzorote....big prob is since i am on a CTO they have rules etc, they have said i have to gain 6kg in 4 weeks, i have to be 35kg to go. I am shitting it, anorexia is still a big problem but i am going to give it a go. I am 29kg now so here comes weight gain. which fucking scares me.
Today i have docs etc then im taking mam out for lunch, i will have veg and some chicken. I have not attempted to eat a 'meal' since i left the unit but it should be ok and kev will be back in from work at 5 so he said i need to try eat some more before i start my feed at 8pm.
i am so scared about weight gain etc but i know i need too and i know above all i have the support at home.
but apart from having a terrible week food wise life is brilliant and i have met the man of my dreams and accepted him into my life...i wont let him down on the holiday side of things...but im heading for a very hard few weeks and i have told him not to expect me to be happy i will cry i will want to not do it but he said he is not leaving my side and he is going to be there through it all.
im so happy and in love, anorexia is just still so strong and here comes the hard work...