(no subject)
Ben and I have been broken up for almost 2 weeks and I seriously feel like I'm dying.
I feel like I can not be happy until we're together again or someone else comes along and sweeps me off my feet. He won't fuckign talk to me and its making me crazy.
I can't sleep because I lay awake wondering if hes dreaming about me or thinking about me. He already knows hes the only thing on my mind.
I think about him at work all day and mess up most my orders because I can't keep focus.
I'm trying to give him space and show I appreciate his existance but he keeps treating me horribley.
He ignores me when we hang out.
He won't ask me to hang out.
He won't pick up my calls so I can ask if we can hang out.
He hangs up on me because hes trying to avoid confrontation.
Sometimes hes intimate and then he pushes me away.
When he answers the phone he says "What?"
Hes so fucking cold to me. and mean.
I just sit here and cry because its my choice whether I want to walk away and I won't until he tells me to.
But he keeps telling me he wants us to stay friends. and I'm trying as hard as I fucking can. I know hes treating me like this on purpose though because he doesn't treat any other female like this.
I want my boyfriend back. I've suffered so much for every wrong thing I've done and I'm ready to get back together and work things out.
I feel like I can not be happy until we're together again or someone else comes along and sweeps me off my feet. He won't fuckign talk to me and its making me crazy.
I can't sleep because I lay awake wondering if hes dreaming about me or thinking about me. He already knows hes the only thing on my mind.
I think about him at work all day and mess up most my orders because I can't keep focus.
I'm trying to give him space and show I appreciate his existance but he keeps treating me horribley.
He ignores me when we hang out.
He won't ask me to hang out.
He won't pick up my calls so I can ask if we can hang out.
He hangs up on me because hes trying to avoid confrontation.
Sometimes hes intimate and then he pushes me away.
When he answers the phone he says "What?"
Hes so fucking cold to me. and mean.
I just sit here and cry because its my choice whether I want to walk away and I won't until he tells me to.
But he keeps telling me he wants us to stay friends. and I'm trying as hard as I fucking can. I know hes treating me like this on purpose though because he doesn't treat any other female like this.
I want my boyfriend back. I've suffered so much for every wrong thing I've done and I'm ready to get back together and work things out.