And I Will Be Wearing Your Lacy Lingerie (Freddy I'm Yours)
I think I've kind of been avoiding updating about the dance because... oh, I don't know, really. I've had a weird last few days. Everything's turned upside down again.
I went to the dance trying to get my mind of Donald, and also slightly off Justin because as over him as I am... well, of course it's still going to be a bit hard for me on the day we broke up. Also our anniversary. And... yeah, normally I'd avoid going to a dance (too many memories...) but Toni convinced me to go. And I guess I'm glad I did. Okay, I won't lie, I'm insanely glad I did. I had a great time. Dancing with random bi girls (don't ask!) and dancing with... Freddy... ahem. He was so shy when he asked me! He was blushing like crazy, it was so cute. And he was the most nervous dancer ever! I could actually feel him shaking! Which made me way less nervous and let me relex, even though I kept having to choke back giggles. All nervousness aside... it felt really right. Being the weirdo I am, I actually wrote a poem about it. Look:
dancing with the devil:
i didn’t know arms that thin
could be so strong
or that a body so slender
would be so hot
but dancing with you
is like dancing with the devil
(didn’t know eyes that blue
could be so innocent)
I won't bother to explain it because there's about four different meanings to every line... the main thing is I really, really, really like him. He's such a sweetie and so cute and... I just don't know if I'd be able to trust him. I mean, I know he'd never hurt me on purpose, but then again, I didn't think Justin would either. I've still got the whole "I was hurt and now I'm having trouble trusting" thing going on. But If we do get together, I will tell him that I've been hurt. It's better to make things like that clear right away.
As for Donald... yeah, I still like him a little. But, honestly, if he can't even talk to me just because he knows I like him- I can't deal with someone like that. I need someone more mature than that. Yeah, Justin was that immature, but that didn't really work out, now did it? I know I'd be better off with Freddy.
So I'm glad Toni dragged me to the dance. (Thanks, girl! Hope you had fun, too!) Dancing with the girls was so much fun. Even though I got called a lesbian a million times. Like I care, though. Oh my gosh, it was so funny, a week or so ago I was in the cafe with Toni and Kurt and Cameron from my drama class comes over from the table across from us and just plops down beside me and goes, "Hi!" I kind of blinked because I wasn't expecting it, and then he does, "Are you two lesbians?" And I'm thinking, great not again. And I said no. And he said, "Are you a lesbian?" And... well, I handled it well. I winked and said, "Cameron, darling, I'm very straight" and leaned over towards him and he jumped out of the chair so fast and just ran! It was hilarious. Always easy to handle it when guys ask, haha. Not so easy when girls do and then get paranoid over it. But out of the group I'm usually with, over half of the girls are bi so it works well.
Anyway, I think Toni's coming over later to watch Grease (I got the soundtrack, yes! And I'm in hysterics over the song "Freddy, my love"- every time I hear the line "And I will be wearing your lacy lingerie (Freddy I'm yours") I come close to dying with laughter) so I better go do homework. Math homework. Insert sigh. Everytime I master one part, we start something new and I'm lost again. I'm not exactly doing well still. Damn, I hate math.
"Sandy, you can't walk out of a drive in!" Hahaha!!!
Edit: Never thought I'd see the day, but I've conformed. I was bored out of my mind so I (drumroll please) made a MySpace. Add me as a friend if you've got one, guys! http://www1.myspace.com/pink_black_and_blonde (And, what the hell? I went pink crazy, haha.)
I went to the dance trying to get my mind of Donald, and also slightly off Justin because as over him as I am... well, of course it's still going to be a bit hard for me on the day we broke up. Also our anniversary. And... yeah, normally I'd avoid going to a dance (too many memories...) but Toni convinced me to go. And I guess I'm glad I did. Okay, I won't lie, I'm insanely glad I did. I had a great time. Dancing with random bi girls (don't ask!) and dancing with... Freddy... ahem. He was so shy when he asked me! He was blushing like crazy, it was so cute. And he was the most nervous dancer ever! I could actually feel him shaking! Which made me way less nervous and let me relex, even though I kept having to choke back giggles. All nervousness aside... it felt really right. Being the weirdo I am, I actually wrote a poem about it. Look:
dancing with the devil:
i didn’t know arms that thin
could be so strong
or that a body so slender
would be so hot
but dancing with you
is like dancing with the devil
(didn’t know eyes that blue
could be so innocent)
I won't bother to explain it because there's about four different meanings to every line... the main thing is I really, really, really like him. He's such a sweetie and so cute and... I just don't know if I'd be able to trust him. I mean, I know he'd never hurt me on purpose, but then again, I didn't think Justin would either. I've still got the whole "I was hurt and now I'm having trouble trusting" thing going on. But If we do get together, I will tell him that I've been hurt. It's better to make things like that clear right away.
As for Donald... yeah, I still like him a little. But, honestly, if he can't even talk to me just because he knows I like him- I can't deal with someone like that. I need someone more mature than that. Yeah, Justin was that immature, but that didn't really work out, now did it? I know I'd be better off with Freddy.
So I'm glad Toni dragged me to the dance. (Thanks, girl! Hope you had fun, too!) Dancing with the girls was so much fun. Even though I got called a lesbian a million times. Like I care, though. Oh my gosh, it was so funny, a week or so ago I was in the cafe with Toni and Kurt and Cameron from my drama class comes over from the table across from us and just plops down beside me and goes, "Hi!" I kind of blinked because I wasn't expecting it, and then he does, "Are you two lesbians?" And I'm thinking, great not again. And I said no. And he said, "Are you a lesbian?" And... well, I handled it well. I winked and said, "Cameron, darling, I'm very straight" and leaned over towards him and he jumped out of the chair so fast and just ran! It was hilarious. Always easy to handle it when guys ask, haha. Not so easy when girls do and then get paranoid over it. But out of the group I'm usually with, over half of the girls are bi so it works well.
Anyway, I think Toni's coming over later to watch Grease (I got the soundtrack, yes! And I'm in hysterics over the song "Freddy, my love"- every time I hear the line "And I will be wearing your lacy lingerie (Freddy I'm yours") I come close to dying with laughter) so I better go do homework. Math homework. Insert sigh. Everytime I master one part, we start something new and I'm lost again. I'm not exactly doing well still. Damn, I hate math.
"Sandy, you can't walk out of a drive in!" Hahaha!!!
Edit: Never thought I'd see the day, but I've conformed. I was bored out of my mind so I (drumroll please) made a MySpace. Add me as a friend if you've got one, guys! http://www1.myspace.com/pink_black_and_blonde (And, what the hell? I went pink crazy, haha.)