love

[xxongal]

'Love doesn't ask many questions because if we stop to think we become fearful. It's an inexplicable fear' it's difficult even to describe it. Maybe it's the fear of being scorned, of not being accepted, or of breaking the spell. It's ridiculous, but that's the way it is. That's why you don't ask - you act. As you've said many times, you have to

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[explosionzhou]

haha..should i take this advice?

[xxongal]

haha, well, it's your choice whether or not to take the advice. maybe you could read this book? i borrowed it and i'm done reading it already. could lend it to you.

sighs. actually, with all the mortality thrust in my face for the whole of 2010 and now the start of this year, it made me really ponder.

and i think of D. why yes, i am not exactly absolutely sure of how i feel towards him. but somehow, i feel that, if i still do feel for him come May, i would most likely tell him.

not in hope that anything will happen, but more so for myself. that i will never live with the regret of wondering.

but with that said, we will see how things are come May.

[explosionzhou]

on one hand, you dont want to regret. on the other you know you're gonna face a problem, a dilemma, a struggle if it is mutual especially if he doesn't share your faith. and you KNOW that there will be a large chunk of you that he will not come to understand or refuse to.

and it hurts you and it bothers you.

sometimes i wonder if i should've controlled myself even more initially so that nobody knows it's mutual.

[xxongal]

sighs. yes, it hurts and it bothers.
and the wondering.

[explosionzhou]

another level of complications and problems in the life of growing older!

but then again, maybe like what hel mut said, there are no problems, just many solutions.each solution will have their particular consequences and joys. your choice, your call.

today this verse came up in testimony time: delight in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. Aunty Mag shared that she was craving for ayam sth from merchant court. her husband wasnt too keen. he said no. :c then next day her friend calls and told her she is DELIVERING ayam sth to her house in 1/2hr! Aunty Mag was so HAPPY! even if it's just a small thought and it sounds funny, she knew God knew and He sent it to her door steps. Like last year on my bday, I had secretly wanted a hamster. but i cant afford it and my parents will say no. but i caught one on my bday!! God knows. :)

haveagoodweekahead. when you think so deep sometimes and the thoughts get heavy, i think dont forget about the times God pulled through for you.balanced view.

[xxongal]

thanks for sharing this :) was on duty at praiseland so didn't get to hear it.

God has His ways of reminding us. I was just reading "Prime time with God" weekly stuff and it was on joy

"Nothing steals your joy like thinking, "I will enjoy my life when ...

and it spoke to me.

Gonna find time to go to a beach before school starts and spend time with Him :)