(no subject)
It's so uncanny. About the differences that I see, from the manga 'Demon Diary' and people I know and converse with.
I visualize Eclipse, and I immediately think of you. Which I shouldn't, as I always visualize myself as Raenef (being the chatty, never-knowing-when-to-shut-up demon lord guy). And then there's the whole plot (slashy, in a few words; Although it never 'happens' in the story, per se) in the story, and the fact that it's not taking place in real life. Well, maybe the 'not taking place' bit. But I'm used to that bit. Not really expecting anything more than friendship.
Which I'm grateful for, so don't get me wrong. I would never jeporadize it for a thing. Too valuable.
I guess I'm just bitching at life at the moment. Again.
I want so many things, yet can't have any of it, if I just fucking sit here. If I want something, I have to say something. Do something. Something. Do what? I don't know. It'd be a mistake if I told anyone my current dilemma, especially when I don't know what my 'dilemma' is. It could be just something that I'm creating in my head.
Meh. That's probably it.
Now. Since I've wasted another ten minutes of time that I need to be sleeping (School registration starts in.. 6 1/2 hours) in another damn entry, I'll close this and hop into bed.
Perhaps that has been the reason that my sleeping has taken a true downfall these past few nights? Perhaps I will sleep, now that I've emptied myself of these damn, pleading thoughts.
I just hope that this entry was what was needed to drain me of what I'm feeling. And just hope that tomorrow night I won't remember my current feelings nor this journal entry ever again.
I visualize Eclipse, and I immediately think of you. Which I shouldn't, as I always visualize myself as Raenef (being the chatty, never-knowing-when-to-shut-up demon lord guy). And then there's the whole plot (slashy, in a few words; Although it never 'happens' in the story, per se) in the story, and the fact that it's not taking place in real life. Well, maybe the 'not taking place' bit. But I'm used to that bit. Not really expecting anything more than friendship.
Which I'm grateful for, so don't get me wrong. I would never jeporadize it for a thing. Too valuable.
I guess I'm just bitching at life at the moment. Again.
I want so many things, yet can't have any of it, if I just fucking sit here. If I want something, I have to say something. Do something. Something. Do what? I don't know. It'd be a mistake if I told anyone my current dilemma, especially when I don't know what my 'dilemma' is. It could be just something that I'm creating in my head.
Meh. That's probably it.
Now. Since I've wasted another ten minutes of time that I need to be sleeping (School registration starts in.. 6 1/2 hours) in another damn entry, I'll close this and hop into bed.
Perhaps that has been the reason that my sleeping has taken a true downfall these past few nights? Perhaps I will sleep, now that I've emptied myself of these damn, pleading thoughts.
I just hope that this entry was what was needed to drain me of what I'm feeling. And just hope that tomorrow night I won't remember my current feelings nor this journal entry ever again.