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[xxjackpackxx]

fuck.
i'm doing it again.
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i have this awful feeling in my stomach right now

i think it may just be this horrible weather thats making me feel like this though
i should be like estatic, but i'm not
i'm worried
and i'm scared
and i'm trying to make excuses

i think i have a fear of commitment, for some wierd reason.

and on top of everything, i flooded out my engine today on the way to school and may have ruined my engine, causing me to be stranded. and for whatever reason, i'm not even worried. i could kind of care less right now.

at least he was with me

aw.
i just got an unneccessary phone call that made me feel a lot better.
he makes life kind of amazing.

for the first time in my entire life, things are exactly how i wanted them to be, if not better. this is crazy.