i really hate myself & want to die

[xxdarkkissesxx]

well looks like i'm a fuckin failuire. i got my report card and failed EVERYTHING but english big fuckin woop. i'm probily not even going to go back to try again anyways. whats the point? grad. with a bunch of people i don't even know? i have no job and am in the 11th grade AGAIN. what can go worse?? well wait it has gotten worse- danny ain't here- hes off with fuck face- chandler. i might end up doing what i do best and try to kil myself- wait i don't do that best because if i did i'd be happy and DEAD!! on top of that my girlfriend's cat had kittens and we have to sell them tomorrow. i might as well run away- ain't got a future here. hell the man i want to marry and have proposed to has yet to mature enough to get a lil dinky ring and say were engaged! i was intorduced to his family as his GIRLFRIEND but yet he calls me his fiancee!!! how fucked up is that? i mean shit his mom has told him to break up with me but he hasn't so what the hell am i to think? i'm so fuckin confused. the major thing that sucks major ass is i can't even practice my magic because i have no money to get the books. i'm pathetic!! i know there ain't going to be anything that will get me back to happy now. why should i be happy? i'll only get depressed again. fuck happiness!!!

fuck this whole dman world and all the happy people in it. i want some cigarettes and to get srunk. who's with me?