(no subject)
alright... so there so many thoughts and insecurities going on through my head i dont know if i can wite it all down... i REALLY needed someone to talk too..not for someone to talk back just someone to talk too.. the only reason i didnt go to my friends is because i know that they like the way i am ... some things probably not ..but in general( i hope) and it sounds kinda weird but i dont want to hear that right now... i dont know what i want to hear. ok so im told to go away because im weird...ok ya i can be weird but just cuz i want attention or want to entertain someone ... its not like im diseased and should go away and that really hurt because my personality is WHO i am i know i should never change who i am for someone else..but where do u draw the line on "modifying" yourself i mean i think ..mayb i should be more quiet mayb i shouldnt care about making people happy or going out of my way to talk to them ...mayb i should just sit in my room and cry about it until i figure it out.. i know what the right thing to do is ..but when someone insults who you are ..something ive worked on for the past 15 years... it makes me feel insecure and vulnerable.. mayb im being too emo and im stressed over tryouts because my mom acts like she doesnt think i can do it but it makes me think about who i am and what i want to be and how i want to become it....