Havent Updated In A While*

[xxbrookiebabexx]

wow...ive been so depressed lately only a couple people know whats going on in my life but i mean what can ya do the best is going to come out of things and hopefully i will come out a happy person i think i just need some time to myself right now i mean the person i was about to tell i liked who i thought liked me but didnt and i had to lie then about who i liked but anyways things happen and im so crushed i think im just gonna give up on my love life...i really dont know and i have so many problems let alone that i dont know im going through a really rough time and i dont know what to do...i feel so ugly fat and dirty i dont know i dont understand what im going through and what all my other problems are going to lead up to i feel so lost alone and i dont know i just i dont know how to explain it its the worst part of my life right now i feel so crushed...and its like i dont want to be touched...everything is going wrong everything i swear if only you knew if only i could tell you...but i cant...its too much for me my life is too much to handle i cant do it anymore i swear i think one of these days im gonna go crazy out of my mind...no i dont have "problems" like issues just a lot of affectable, important, affecting problems to where i dont know what to do with myself or handel things anymore i dont think anybody will ever understand all this pain i am going through i need help i just want to sit down and have an actual conversation i try to talk to people but it seems like they dont care...i want to do things that i dont even know what but its just i cant take it anymore you have no idea how much i am going through...with friends guys family everything nothing can go right i swear i think my life is so screwed up i didnt write this for you to feel sorry for me or try and make you feel sorry for me because thats the last thing i want anyone to do or feel, i just need to get this out before i feel like im gonna explode...my head has been pounding for days but it seems like years and each day seems like its a million years long i feel like im going through hell i dont know hopefully this will start looking up...hopefully days will go by faster and things will get better...theres so much on my mind weighing me down i just i dont know i feel so ugly and fat and i feel like i dont want to be seen i just want to be alone and untouched its weird..and i want things to get better with something that i cant mention but anyways im gonna go .... comment on this if you want to....
*LaTeR*