[Accidental voice post]
[Light crying in the background.]
Always her. Always.
... I'm such a horrible person. Being jealous of a woman who's not even alive anymore.
He still puts her first. He'll always put her first. No matter what. And I can't blame him for it. I... I can't even be mad for it.
[Voice turns considerably bitter now. Increasing in volume.]
I can't be mad at either of them. Kratos or Yuan.
I... I just love him. So much. But he continues to leave me. He doesn't even tell me when he's leaving. He just disappears and expects me to keep waiting for him. And as much as it hurts I just sit here and wait for him. I let him go to the woman that will always be first and I just sit here and take it!
And then he thinks he has a right to interfere with our lives anymore. He left us. After I fought for him! After I screamed at Kratos for wishing to abandon him in the first place. And he has the nerve to tell me this is my fault?!
I have done so much for the both of them! I have loved them both and I have sacrificed everything for them both and it's still not enough for either of them! Kraots disappears in the night and thinks I will just wait for him. Yuan is so inconsistent in our lives and comes and goes as he pleases. And I sit here and I take it from both of them.
[Definitely yelling, practically screaming, now.]
I just wanted to feel whole again. I wanted to love. I wanted people to care for. I left my friends and family. I gave up my world for them and they can barely commit to anything. Either of them!
I-i don't see why I try. I don't see why I let them hurt me so much. I have given up my home, my family, I have even tried to change how I behave for them. And they abandon me. They both just leave me and think it's okay to come back whenever they wish and I will let them!
.... And I will. I'll let them. I'll sit here and let them abuse me... I'll just... I'll let them.
[Breaks down crying, not even realizing everything she's said was being recorded.]
Always her. Always.
... I'm such a horrible person. Being jealous of a woman who's not even alive anymore.
He still puts her first. He'll always put her first. No matter what. And I can't blame him for it. I... I can't even be mad for it.
[Voice turns considerably bitter now. Increasing in volume.]
I can't be mad at either of them. Kratos or Yuan.
I... I just love him. So much. But he continues to leave me. He doesn't even tell me when he's leaving. He just disappears and expects me to keep waiting for him. And as much as it hurts I just sit here and wait for him. I let him go to the woman that will always be first and I just sit here and take it!
And then he thinks he has a right to interfere with our lives anymore. He left us. After I fought for him! After I screamed at Kratos for wishing to abandon him in the first place. And he has the nerve to tell me this is my fault?!
I have done so much for the both of them! I have loved them both and I have sacrificed everything for them both and it's still not enough for either of them! Kraots disappears in the night and thinks I will just wait for him. Yuan is so inconsistent in our lives and comes and goes as he pleases. And I sit here and I take it from both of them.
[Definitely yelling, practically screaming, now.]
I just wanted to feel whole again. I wanted to love. I wanted people to care for. I left my friends and family. I gave up my world for them and they can barely commit to anything. Either of them!
I-i don't see why I try. I don't see why I let them hurt me so much. I have given up my home, my family, I have even tried to change how I behave for them. And they abandon me. They both just leave me and think it's okay to come back whenever they wish and I will let them!
.... And I will. I'll let them. I'll sit here and let them abuse me... I'll just... I'll let them.
[Breaks down crying, not even realizing everything she's said was being recorded.]