With a noose to my neck to choke out my words....
Tonight has been, to say the least, just........ god damn i don't even know the true words as to describe how i feel right now. so i best just describe what concured today. it started with my blairing alarm clock... Loud, jarring, cold... completely unforgiving. i dragged my hapless body to the kitchen to take my "active sanity" pills to say the least. showered and got dressed. sat about the house eating day-old cheese burgers before i left. i went to the gas station first, grabbed my smokes and drink, filled up the tank, cleaned up the windows. standard affair things in other words. i went up to five points for a bit, a coffee under the unforgiving sun turned bleak from the clouds. i went off to get eddie. there was a change to plans so really the best i could do was pursue idle talk and drop him off. i headed to ada's to pick her up, went to guitar center then moe's. all the while joking and laughing about small things, but those laughs would remain silent tonight. i feel anything but wanting to laugh or joke, to even smile or grin. later on the night, we met with some friends and was later invited to go to "Six Shot" or whatever the billiards bar was called. At first things were a bit queasy from the baligerant noise and personal dramas of other attendies. but things smoothed over later on into the night. It was, for a while, calm for me. allowed me time to rest, conversate and enjoy myself. it came to a crashing hault when a group of "rednecks" for lack of a better word, started taunting a couple of my homosexual friends and continuously throwing ice and metal chips at them as they danced. it angered me when i was told of this, but remained as calm as possible. i confronted one of them and most curtously asked of them to cease their actions. apparently, they didn't take well to have some "Chink" telling them whats up and one thing eventually just lead to another to say the least. THe managers hustled to get us out of the pool hall but sadly, it didn't end their. one of our friends proposed that we head to her parent's house for safe keeping. but as soon as i pulled out, a massive silver Dodge Ram 2500 with a raised suspension system came charging at one of my friends cars at a haphazard attempt to run them off the road, we blaze at upwards to 85 MPH (Atleast that's what i was hauling). regardless of making it to the house, we were still followed, they hurriedly called the police as i raced to my trunk to grab my shotgun, but unfortunately (well rather QUITE fortunately) it was replaced with my guitar equipment. what was I to do? serenade them to death? fraid not. the truck with a smaller sedan-style car stopped at the main entrance of the road, it was a dead end, the females and what not ran to the house, myself, a few other guys around my age that were with us and the girl's father approached the car. Guns were drawn immediately, i dropped my smoke and walked quietly with the father. As nervous as I wish i was, I was quite oddly more aggitated than scared to have guns pointed towards my face. but the father spoke with the driver and they soon took off. the sedan-style car stopped a house off to taunt me, i wave him over but he runs off. typical to say the least. Gun or no gun, they would've better make sure the first shot would've killed me, i was hardly in the mood for games. the police arrived about a half an hour later. around that time the truck and this time two cars pulled up, they saw the cars and immediately burned off. a small pursuit accured. about 30 minutes or so, they return wanting to speaking with me specifically. they stated that i threw a projectile at their vehicle and sited that as a plausible cause for the confrontation, my friends tried to plead my case as did I, but with that, i was introduced to a warning of arrest and a mistemeanor charge. it would've been nothing compared to what the rednecks would've gotten but jail is no place i wish to return to. not thee slightest. i shut my big fucking yap that second. but soon things were dispersed and some of the younger of our friends taken home. nothing charged, no arrests, just a report and a fair warning, never return. i'll adhear to that whole heartedly. to say the least i could quite easily understand why they would'nt have taken up my story, i was dressed in street clothes, i'm only twenty, one of the assailants was a bouncer for the pool hall and there WAS indeed a dent (Not necessarily caused by me but there WAS a dent). needless to say, no matter how innocent i may have been, my story would've meant diddly shit to get me outta cuffs. a much belated thank you to the girl's parents (i'm quite certain she knows what i'm talking about) and a much needed apology to my brother's EddiexSeemz and Chris (M. Shadows) for the daunting "Call to Arms" in a moment in shock, it would've been best to just leave my phone in the car but at the time, it seemed like the ONLY solution so i sincerly apologize for that. needless to say, i'm quite anxious and somewhat paranoid at this time, i'll most certainly be odd about cars following me for the next few days, but hopefully, my life will return to SOME kind of normalcy. but this night will hardly be forgotten, a reminder to myself that in some, hell MOST cases, trying to talk things out does not, WIll NOT and SHALL NOT prove useful, its best just not to be in the enviornment in the first place....