(no subject)

[xtrinpiercedx]

sometimes i wonder if its worth thinking about.. does it matter i care? does she even see that i care.. i am pushing her away and she is pushing me away.. it hurts me so bad though.. but i can't let her know... i don't even know if i will see her when i am up there in a couple weeks.. but i wish it didn't hurt so much pushing her away.. i just want to be there for her.. to help her out if she needs it to be a friend..

i feel so alone.. so unemotional.. so hurt... so much pain.. i just wanna cry.. but i can't let myself.. i won't let it happen.. i just need to pretend like everything is okay.. i am fine.. i will get over it... in time.. i hope.. it just hurts.. i care too much for her...

whatever..

trin