Third Watch, WYWG Series, Fic 6: Sadness (2A/2B)
Title: Wherever You Will Go series, fic #6: Sadness (2/2)
Authors: Demelza and X_tremeroswellian
Email(s): demelza81@yahoo.co.nz and X_tremeroswellian@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: The characters don't belong to us. They belong to Edward Allen Bernero and John Wells and a bunch of other people that we've never met before. Please don't sue.
Summary: Faith's home life becomes more troubled as she and Bosco grow closer together.
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: Up through and including "The Unforgiven."
Author's Note: This is the sixth story in a series of Third Watch fics we're writing titled "Wherever You Will Go." The first one is "Confessions," the second is "Here With Me," the third is "Pain," the fourth is "Tears," and the fifth is "Fear." You may want to read those first before continuing.
Sadness (Part Two)
Faith quietly unlocked the door to her family's apartment and stepped inside. She removed the keys from the lock and shut the door softly. She turned to see Fred sitting on the couch, in between Emily and Charlie, watching television. She stared at them for a long moment wordlessly, and swallowed hard. She shut her eyes, then opened them again. "Hi, guys."
Emily was quick to look at her mother and smile widely. While Fred slowly turned to her, half smile on his face. "How did it go?"
She nodded quickly, forcing a smile. "It was fine."
"Oh. So, you guys are all done with the questioning? You won't be called back in?"
"Not until the trial, hopefully."
"Hopefully." He nodded.
"Yeah." She let out a breath and sat down on the arm of the couch. "So what are you guys watching?"
Fred nodded toward the tv. "Camp Nowhere."
"It's a really great movie. I like Mud."
Faith smiled at her daughter and smoothed back the hair from her face. She looked at the screen for a second, then looked over at Fred again. "Everything go okay while I was gone?"
Fred nodded, his eyes shifting from the tv to his wife. He looked up at her, and smiled. "Yeah, fine. We've just been watching a couple movies."
She nodded. "Good..." She stood up and took a deep breath.
"You okay, hon?"
"Yeah, just...tired..."
"Mom, can we still go to McDonalds tonight?" Charlie asked, pleadingly.
Emily looked away from the tv to her brother, then up at her mom. "Can we, please?"
She smiled tiredly. "Yeah, of course."
Fred shook his head. "No, you can't," he said, looking up at Faith just as she spoke. "What, no, Faith, we can't afford it."
She looked at him, startled. "Fred, it's McDonalds...not Chanterelle's."
Fred frowned. "It's still too expensive. We can be saving the money for something else. Like a family meal out to one of those fancy restaurants."
"Mom, you promised," he whined.
"Yeah, Mom." Emily matched Charlie's whine.
"I know I did, Sweetie. You guys go get ready, okay?"
Fred glared at Faith as Emily jumped off the sofa and ran through to her and Charlie's room.
She turned around and headed for the kitchen.
"Faith!" he said loudly, climbing to his feet and followed her. "Don't walk away from me when we're having a discussion."
She sighed and continued into the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of aspirin from the cabinet above the sink and twisting off the top. "I promised them, all right?"
"I don't care," he said, lowering his voice, but keeping his angered tone. "We agreed to cut back on un-necessary spending. The kids can wait a few weeks, and we'll all go out to a nice meal."
She shook a couple of the aspirin out of the bottle and swallowed them down with a drink of water. "It's not that expensive. We can still go out in a few weeks," she said, shrugging.
Fred sighed angrily. "That's not the point."
She was starting to get annoyed herself, but she tried not to let the agitation show in her voice. "Then what is the point?"
"The point is, how are we supposed to save when you go off and waste money all the time?"
She stared at him. "Waste money? Fred, the only damned places I ever go are work and here."
"What about that damned gum your always chewing? And the food you buy on patrol?"
"Yeah, excuse me for eating," she muttered under her breath, turning away.
He angrily sighed, pulling her back around to face him. "Faith, I'm just saying it all adds up in the long run."
"So after tonight, we won't go out to McDonalds or anywhere else for awhile."
Fred sighed again. "If we want to save, it's the way it has to be. Money doesn't grow on trees. If you'd passed that exam, and were getting that extra money, we could be spending a little money every once and a while."
Her eyes narrowed. "So that's what this is about." She shook her head, feeling angry as she moved past him. "I should have known."
"Faith!" he said louder, finally turning to face her as she moved away. "We have to cut costs, that's all I'm saying."
Faith turned to face him. "Fine, you want to cut costs? Then don't go. I never said you had to," she said coolly, then turned away again and walked down the hallway toward their bedroom.
Fred angrily glared after her. He waited a moment, as though the wheels in his head were turning in thought and came to a sudden halt as he went after her. He walked down the hallway and angrily opened the door. A frown etched across his face, he stared at his wife.
Faith ignored his stare as she reached into her closet and pulled out a different shirt to wear, one that was a little less formal.
"You're not going. We can't afford it!"
She turned very slowly and glared at him. "You don't get to tell me what to do. You're my husband, not my owner."
"I bring in my share of the pay check, and I'm telling you, Faith, you are not taking those kids to McDonalds. We cannot afford it."
"I made a promise to my kids, and I'm going to keep it. Don't worry, Fred. I won't touch your money." She quickly changed shirts.
Charlie came into the room right then. "Can we go now?"
Fred shook his head at his wife, determined for her to listen to him. "You're not taking them," he told her, his tone a warning.
She raised an eyebrow at him, then looked at her son. "Yeah, we can go now." She walked toward the door without responding to her husband's warning.
Emily came running out of the room with her thick jacket on. She looked once at her dad, seeing the angered frown on his face, and followed her mom and brother.
"So what'd you guys do at school today?" she asked as they headed toward the run front door.
Fred stood in the doorway of his and Faith's bedroom, glaring after Faith.
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"Okay, what do you guys want to eat?" Faith asked as Emily and Charlie picked out a booth to sit at.
"Chicken McNugget Happy Meal!"
She nodded. "Em? "
Emily looked at her brother and smiled widely. "I'll have a cheeseburger Happy Meal," she said, turning back to her mom.
"Okay, two Happy Meals coming right up. I'll be right back."
"Okay," Emily agreed.
Charlie glanced over at his sister after his mom walked away. "Dad was really mad, wasn't he?"
Emily nodded, looking at their mother as she walked over and got in line to get their meals. She turned back to Charlie. "Yeah, he just wouldn't leave Mom alone."
He bit his lip and fiddled with the salt shaker on the table. "Why'd he get so mad?"
She shrugged, sitting back against the chair. "I don't know. Money, I think."
He sighed and laid his head down on the tabletop. "I wish we were rich."
"I don't."
He jerked his head up. "Why not?" he asked, confused.
"Because..." she said, sounding unsure. "If we were rich...Dad would just find something else to moan about."
"Why are you being so down on Dad now? I thought you liked him better than Mom."
They didn't see Faith standing a couple feet away. She swallowed hard, trying to push aside her son's words as she moved over to the table. "I forgot to ask what you guys wanted to drink."
Emily looked at Charlie with a concerned stare, then looked up at her mom. "Rasberry, if that's okay?"
She nodded. "That's fine. Charlie?"
Charlie glanced up at her. "Cherry coke."
Faith forced a smile, though she felt like her insides had been torn in half. "Okay." She turned and walked away from the table.
Emily waited until her mother was walking away before turning back to Charlie. She swung her foot and kicked him lightly. "Good one, Charlie, Mom might have heard."
He rolled his eyes. "She didn't."
"But she could have. Didn't think of that though, did you?" she bit back, slamming her back into the chair angrily.
"What's your problem? Jeez. I just said the truth."
"So what. You don't *know* the truth," she stated, sitting back against the seat and glaring at him.
Charlie glared back at her. "Whatever."
Faith approached the table a moment later and glanced back and forth between the two of them. "Everything okay here?"
Emily glared harder at Charlie. "Fine."
Faith took a deep breath and handed Charlie his Happy Meal box, then handed Emily hers. She sat down on the seat next to her son and folded her hands on the table.
Emily gratefully and silently took her Happy Meal box and opened it. She thanked her mom, and proceeded to remove its contents.
Faith swallowed hard as she looked at her daughter. "I'll uh...be right back, okay? I need to use the restroom."
Emily nodded. "Okay."
She stood up and headed back toward the bathroom.
Faith locked herself in the bathroom and stared at her reflection in the mirror for a long moment. Charlie's words echoed in her mind. //Why are you being so down on Dad now? I thought you liked him better than Mom.// She leaned back against the door and slid down to the ground. Pulling her knees to her chest, she laid her head on her arms and began to cry.
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Bosco had been driving around ever since he dropped Faith off at her place. He just didn't feel like going home. Or anywhere else for that matter. After awhile, he somehow found himself at McDonalds. He immediately spotted the Yokas's truck in the parking lot. Without thinking about it, he pulled his car into the parking lot and parked right next to their vehicle. He shut off his car, but remained sitting in the driver's seat, his hand gripping the steering wheel tightly. He swallowed hard, trying to decide whether or not to go in.
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Charlie frowned and looked across the table at his sister. "Is she not gonna eat?"
"She's just using the bathroom Charlie," she replied, not really answering him.
"Yeah, but she didn't bring anything back when she brought our food," he pointed out.
Emily finally met his eyes, and then looked at the table. He was right. "I'm gonna go see if she's okay," she said, quickly getting up from the booth and finding her way to the ladies bathroom. There, she knocked on the door. "Mom?" she asked.
Faith took a deep breath, startled to hear her daughter's voice right outside the door. "I'll be out in just a minute, Em," she said, glad that her voice was calmer than her emotions.
"Are you okay?" she asked again, sounding worried.
"Yeah, sweetie, I'm fine," she answered, closing her eyes tightly.
"Are you sure? Because you looked upset before."
She rose to her feet and turned the water faucet on. She splashed a few handfuls of cold water on her face and then wiped off the excess water with a paper towel. She looked at herself in the mirror again, glad there was no visible evidence of her crying bout. She took a deep breath and opened the door, smiling warmly at Emily. "I'm okay. Just had a little too much caffeine today, that's all." She placed a hand on her daughter's shoulder.
Emily nodded, smiling up at her mom. "Hey, Mom..."
"Yeah?"
"I'm sorry."
Faith looked at her in surprise. "For what?"
"For everything."
She paused, then stopped walking toward the table. "You don't have anything to apologize for, Em. You didn't do anything wrong," she said softly, shaking her head.
She shook her own head. "Yeah, I did, I haven't been very nice to you lately."
Faith bit her lip, but smiled at her daughter. She gently tucked a strand of dark hair behind Emily's ear. "It's okay. I'm not upset with you," she assured her.
Emily smiled up at her mom and looked over at the table where Charlie was eating his chicken nuggets. "So, why didn't you get anything to eat?"
"I'm just not very hungry. I guess I'm still full from lunch," she said, shrugging slightly. Then she paused again. Had she even eaten lunch? She couldn't remember..
"Well, you can have some of my fries if you want. I don't always eat them."
She smiled slightly."Yeah, we'll see. Let's get back to the table before your food gets cold, okay?"
Emily nodded. "Okay," she said, smiling widely, and walking back to the table.
Faith swallowed hard, trying to push away the sadness that was still churning inside her. Then she forced a smile onto her face and sat back down next to Charlie. "Is it any good?" she asked him, elbowing him in the arm.
Charlie looked up at her and grinned, his mouth too full to talk. "Mmm-hmm."
She chuckled.
Emily opened the wrapper on her burger, and picked up the fries with her other hand, extending one to her mom. "Want one?" she asked, taking a mouthful of her burger.
Faith accepted a fry from her and ate it quickly.
"So, at school today..." she said, munching on a full mouth of food. "This boy in my class, Brodie, he got suspended..."
"What for?"
She swallowed the food and took a sip of her rasberry. "He was caught looking up all the girls' dresses."
Faith stared at her. "He what?"
"We were all standing in line for lunch, and he went behind us pulling up our dresses and looking under them. He's suspended for three weeks. Didn't Dad tell you? I gave him the note from the principal."
"No, he didn't tell me," she answered, trying her best to keep her anger out of her tone.
Emily looked at her curiously. "He should have, both parents are supposed to see the note. Principal Gatby wants to talk to you both tomorrow afternoon."
Son of a bitch, she cursed inwardly. She took a deep breath and nodded. "I'll talk to your dad when we go home," she said, giving her daughter a small smile.
"Okay," Emily said, drinking more of her drink.
Charlie glanced over at her. "When we're done eating, can we go play in the playplace?" he asked, hint of pleading to his voice.
Faith turned her head to look at him. "Yeah, of course."
Emily shook her head at Charlie. "You are such a child," she playfully remarked.
He stuck his tongue out at her.
Faith grinned and shook her head.
Emily poked her tongue back, before settling back in the seat more comfortably. "Mom...can I ask you something?"
"Sure, Sweetie. What's on your mind?"
She swallowed, looking at her mom. "Are you and Dad going to get a divorce?"
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With a resolved sigh, Bosco gave into his need to see Faith, even if it meant seeing Fred, too. He walked inside the door and over toward the booth where they were sitting. They hadn't noticed his presence yet. He idely wondered where Fred was when he heard Emily's question. He froze, waiting for Faith's response.
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The smile faded from Faith's face as she realized both of her children were looking at her, waiting for a reponse. She looked down at the table top for a long moment before looking at Emily again. "No, honey. Your dad and I aren't getting a divorce."
Emily nodded, noting a change in her mother's voice. She hadn't meant to ask, but with all the problems lately, she did wonder. So did Charlie, if any of their late night talks during their parents' usual fighting matches were anything to go by. She took another sip of her drink, and had only let go of the straw when she looked over to where Charlie was when a familiar sight caught her eyes. "Uncle Bosco!?"
Faith felt her her heart skip a beat as she looked over her shoulder and saw him standing there. Their eyes locked. She swallowed hard, the sadness inside her deepening a little more.
Bosco swallowed, forcing a smile. He'd overheard, and after what he and Faith had been through, he still couldn't really believe her reply. He had hoped, ever so hoped, but to hear her say those words. He casually walked over.
"Bosco! Want some fries?"
"Sure." He smiled, sitting beside Emily as she moved over to make room for him.
Faith looked at him briefly, offering a short smile. "Hey," she said softly.
He smiled over at her. "Hey," he said back, taking one of the fries that Charlie had offered.
Charlie grinned at him. "Look at my Spiderman toy!" he said, holding up the packaged toy that came with his meal.
Bosco grinned back. "Cool toy! What did you get, Em?" he asked, turning to Emily.
Emily used her finger to push the toy out from under a napkin. "Same as Charlie," she said, sighing slightly.
Faith looked at her. "Do you want me to see if I can trade it in for one of the barbie toys?"
Emily looked at Charlie, then turned back to her mom. She nodded. "Can you?" she asked in a nice manner.
She nodded. "Sure." She took the toy from her daughter and stood up quickly. Almost immediately the room began to spin and she grabbed the back of the booth for support so she didn't fall.
Bosco quickly stood up, putting his hand on Faith's back. "You okay, partner?" he asked, moving around her to check if she was okay.
She closed her eyes and nodded. "Yeah, I just...stood up too fast."
He took one more look at her before removing his hand. "Are you sure? I can go exchange the toy, I've got to get myself something to eat anyway."
She opened her eyes and looked at him, still feeling off-balance. "Actually, I think I'll take you up on that offer."
He nodded and helped her sit back down. He took Emily's toy and had just turned on his heel when he turned back again. "Get you a drink or something?"
Faith shook her head. "Nah, I'm good. Thanks."
"You sure? What about you kids, need a refill? Anything else to eat?"
"I'm sure, Boz. Thanks."
Charlie grinned. "Can I get another cherry pepsi?"
Bosco smiled at Faith, and nodded to Charlie. "Yep. What about you, Emily?"
Emily sipped the last of her rasberry and handed him the carton. "Can I have the same as Charlie?"
Bosco nodded again. "Sure. Be right back then."
He went over and waited in line, running the orders through his mind so not to forget exactly what Emily and Charlie had asked for. The line moved forward and as he waited, he turned to look over at Faith. He was worried, not knowing exactly why she had gotten dizzy like that, even if she did say it was only because she had stood too fast. Why don't I believe you? he asked inwardly, just watching her.
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Over at the table, Emily had just about finished her fries. She was really worried about her mom. "Mom, are you feeling okay?" she asked.
Faith looked at her, surprised. "Yeah, honey, I'm fine."
"Are you sure? You don't look that well."
She swallowed hard. "I'm okay. Just didn't sleep very well last night. Nothing to worry about," she said, trying to sound assuring.
Emily nodded, but even she didn't believe her mother's words.
Charlie sat back against his seat and looked at his mom. His sister was right; she didn't look very well. He frowned but remained silent.
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Bosco was only in line for another few minutes before he was up to the counter and ordering the Cherry Coke's for both Emily and Charlie. He ordered a couple Big Mac's for himself, along with a hashbrown, large fries and a large Coke. He also ordered a second packet of large fries for Emily and Charlie. He exchanged Emily's Spiderman toy for a Barbie one. After paying for the goods, he scooped up the tray they had all been placed on and walked back to the booth and sat down. "Here ya go..." he said, handing the drinks out to both children, and handing them the second packet of fries. "Thought you guys might like some more."
"Thanks, Bosco! You're the coolest!" Charlie exclaimed.
Emily quickly reached out for a few fries and shoved them in her mouth. "Thanks, Bosco!"
Faith looked at him gratefully. "Thanks."
Bosco smiled, unwrapping his first burger. "Sure thing. You sure you don't want anything? I can go back up there."
She shook her head. "No, I'm good. Thanks."
He smiled again. "Okay."
Charlie quickly wolfed down his drink and some of the fries Bosco had brought over for them. Then he squirmed in his seat and looked at him mom. "Can I go play in the playplace now?"
Faith gave him a small smile and nodded. "Sure."
"Thanks, Mom!"
"You be careful," Bosco said to Charlie, not even waiting until he'd swallowed what was in his mouth.
Faith stood up to let him out, her hand gripping onto the back of the booth tightly. "Don't forget to take your shoes off!" she called after him as he took off running.
Emily sat next to Bosco, just shaking her head. He looked at her, however, as if wondering why she hadn't gone with Charlie. "It's for kids," she said, as if knowing what he was thinking.
Faith raised an eyebrow and looked at her.
"I'm twelve, Mom, not a kid."
She smiled. "Which is why you were playing in it just a few weeks ago when we were here last."
Emily's jaw dropped open, but she couldn't find the words to fight that statement. So instead she just sipped more of her drink.
Faith supressed the urge to start laughing. "Em, if you want to go play, it's all right."
Bosco looked between mother and daughter, trying hard himself not to laugh.
Emily looked at her mother, then at Bosco. "Can I get past, please?" she asked quietly, as if a little embarassed to admit she wanted to go play.
Faith bit her lip to keep herself from laughing as her daughter quickly scooted out of the booth as Bosco stood up to let her out. She watched as Emily turned and hurried off in the same direction Charlie had gone moments before. She let out a deep breath as she turned back to face her partner.
Bosco sat back down at the booth and looked over at Faith, not saying a word, just worry running through his mind. He really didn't know what to say, but just look at her.
She tucked a strand of loose hair behind her ear and looked down at the table for a moment. "So I guess you changed your mind about coming."
He nodded, clearing his throat a little. "Yeah. I hope you don't mind...?"
She quickly shook her head. "No, not at all. I..uh...I'm glad you're here." She forced a smile and looked up at him.
He smiled back. "So, how come you're here alone with the kids? I thought Fred was coming."
"Yeah, well. Apparently we can't afford to be here," she muttered, rolling her eyes.
Bosco scoffed, scrunching the napkin in front of him up into the ball of his hand in anger. "McDonalds, as in, the cheapest burgers on the planet McDonalds?" he asked, his tone sarcastic.
She sat back against the booth. "The very one."
He shook his head again. "I knew he was tight, but that tight is ridiculous, Faith."
"Yeah, that's what I said." She grimaced as the pounding in her head started again.
"So what happened?" he asked, sitting back.
She shrugged. "I just told him if he didn't want to come, he didn't have to."
"Well, I'm glad he didn't come." He paused at that statement, before continuing. "I mean, so that you get to spend time with Em and Charlie by yourself."
Charlie's words flashed into her mind again. //Why are you being so down on Dad now? I thought you liked him better than Mom.//
Faith looked down at the table, swallowing hard. "Yeah," she said softly.
"Are you okay?" he asked, leaning forward over the table a little.
She nodded, but remained quiet.
Bosco reached his hand out and touched hers. "Faith...please, tell me what's wrong...?" he asked, hating seeing her like this.
She shifted in her seat, holding her breath and trying not to cry. She shook her head. "It's nothing."
He searched her eyes, and he knew that there was something wrong. "Come on, Faith, tell me."
She met his eyes, unable to stop a tear from dropping down onto her cheek. "Damn it," she muttered, quickly wiping it away with the back of her hand.
"Hey, it's okay..." he said, gently squeezing her hand. "You're allowed to cry. I just wish I knew what was wrong."
"It's Emily," she said finally, wiping away another tear as it fell.
"Emily?" he asked, sounding a little shocked. "What did she say?"
She shook her head. "It's nothing she said...I just...overheard the kids talking..." She looked away, out the window, trying as hard as she could not to breakdown right in the middle of McDonalds. "She hates me," she whispered.
Bosco was taken aback. "She what? No, Faith, she doesn't hate you."
"Maybe hate's too strong a word." She swallowed hard, resting her forehead on one hand. "But she doesn't like me. At all. I mean, I don't blame her. How could she? You know, I'm never around...I'm never there for them when they need me. I haven't been a very good mother."
"Faith, that's a lie," he told her, squeezing her hand again. "You've been the best mother you can be, she knows that. Those kids adore you, Charlie and Emily *both*. Faith, listen to me, she understands, she loves you, and she understands," he repeated.
Faith shook her head, her eyes full of tears. "I don't think so, Bosco."
"Kids are kids, Faith. They go through stages of not liking their parents. It's the cycle. Father and son, mother and daughter... she loves you. Don't you ever doubt that. Not even for a minute."
She swallowed hard. "Yeah, well...I know she adores Fred."
"Well, one day she'll see him for his true colors."
Faith stared down at the table. "He's a good father, Bosco."
"I don't care. The minute those kids see how he treats you, in their eyes he'll no longer be the saint they think he is."
She looked up at him, realizing he was speaking from personal experience. "Sorry, Boz..." she said quietly, cursing herself inwardly for bringing up the subject at all.
He swallowed, shaking his head. "Don't. Just, I don't want you thinking Emily hates you. If you want to know how she feels, just ask her. But I know she doesn't hate you."
She bit her lip, trying to smile, but not quite succeeding. "I hope you're right."
"Trust me, Faith," he said, sqeezing her hand again.
Her lower lip trembled and she looked down again, trying not to cry.
Bosco squeezed her hand again. "It's okay..." he said, trying to reassure her.
She couldn't stop the tears from running down her cheeks. " I don't know what the hell is wrong with me today," she said, shaking her head as she wiped at the tears with her hand.
"Well, you've been through a lot lately, it's perfectly understandable."
"Yeah, well, I've been through a lot before when--" She cut herself off. "I've been through a lot before and it's never affected me like this."
"When what?"
She met his eyes, startled that'd he caught her slip. "Just a lot before. With Fred when he was drinking and...just a lot of stuff."
He didn't believe her. "Oh. Well, this isn't like that, this is more...different situations."
She looked down at the table, taking a deep breath. "Yeah."
"You can talk about it, you know. With me. I'm always here to listen."
"I just...haven't been sleeping well lately. I don't know. It's just stress." She leaned back in the booth again.
Bosco sat backwards himself. "Well, I wish you'd let me help you."
She looked at him, feeling sad. "You do," she said softly.
"How, when you won't tell me what's wrong?" he asked, sadly.
She felt her eyes fill with tears again. "I just--I can't, Bosco. I'm sorry. I want to, I just can't."
He mentally kicked himself for making her cry. "Don't be sorry...I shouldn't push you. I know that, I'm sorry."
Faith bit her lip. "It's okay. I know it's just because you're worried," she said tiredly.
"But still..." He leaned back against the booth. "I don't know that I can eat anything else." He sighed, pushing the tray away from him.
"Yeah, well, you had enough food there to feed an army, Boz," she said, smiling slightly.
He grinned. "And yet, I still couldn't finish it," he said sighing with a laugh.
Faith took a deep breath and released it slowly. "Did you get your invitation to the policeman's ball?"
Bosco nodded quickly. "Yeah, mail yesterday. You?"
She nodded. "Yeah, this morning."
"You going?" he asked.
She shrugged. "I don't know. Are you?"
"Maybe. I'm not sure."
"Yeah..." She looked out the window. "Looks like it's going to rain again."
Bosco looked out the window, too, but only for a moment before looking back at her. "Yeah. Torrential downpours, the reporter said on the news."
"Great," she muttered. "With all this rain, I'm starting to think we're gonna drown."
Bosco couldn't hold back a snicker. "Just mother nature taking its course."
She didn't smile. "Yeah, well, I'm sick of all the storms," she said, her voice quiet, distant.
"It'll pass," he said. "So, what do you have planned for tomorrow....?" he asked.
"Apparently Fred and I are supposed to be going to Emily's school to talk to her principal, which he failed to mention to me."
"What? Why do you have to go to the school, or for that matter... why the hell didn't he tell you?"
She shrugged. "I don't know. He probably just forgot." Her jaw clenched. "Some boy at her school was going around looking up all the girl's dresses today."
Bosco cringed at the thought. "What a pervert. Hope they suspend him."
"Three day suspension." She shook her head. "He should be expelled," she said angrily.
"Tell them that tomorrow. The kid should be. When I was seven, this boy at my school did the same thing, he was never allowed back in the school."
"Oh, believe me, I'm gonna tell them. If he's allowed back, who knows what he'll do next," she said tensely.
All Bosco could do was nod.
She closed her eyes momentarily, then opened them again. "Bosco, I'm sorry."
"For what?"
"For being lousy dinner company."
He laughed slightly. "You weren't," he promised.
She almost smiled. "I promise to be in a better mood for our next shift together."
He just smiled, and slowly turned the drink of coke around that he hadn't even touched yet.
She hesitated. "I should round up the kids and head home before it pours."
Bosco nodded. "I'll go get them."
She shook her head. "Nah, it's okay." She swallowed hard, looked away. "Thanks for being here, Bosco."
"Sure thing. I enjoyed the company."
"No, I meant...For being here for me," she said softly.
He nodded, smiling. "Anytime, you know I'll always be here for you."
"I know." She rose to her feet and instantly felt another dizzy spell wash over her as her head pounded. She grabbed her head in one hand as she sat back down, hard on the booth.
"Faith!" he almost shouted. "Are you okay?"
She grimaced at the pain. "Yeah...my head is just....I've had this headache all day."
"What, why didn't you tell me? I've got some aspirin if you want some?" he asked, taking the small container of pills out of his inner jacket pocket. "Here, take it with some of my coke."
"I took advil a couple hours ago," she said, shaking her head.
"Well, one more won't hurt."
She nodded and took the bottle from him. She quickly removed the lid and shook two pills out, then swallowed them down with his drink.
"If it doesn't work, you might need to try some extra strength excederin later tonight."
Faith looked at him and opened her mouth to speak, then hesitated.
He looked at her, somewhat squinting. "No, what?"
"I...uh...I'm not sure I should be driving right now."
He nodded. "That's okay. I'll drive you home, then I'll come back in a cab to get my car."
She swallowed hard. "I'm sorry, I know it's a lot of trouble...it's just...the kids are with me...if it was just me, I wouldn't ask."
"Faith, it's fine. And, if it was just you, I wouldn't let you drive home anyway."
She met his eyes and nodded, feeling that sadness stir within her again. "Thanks, Boz."
"Anytime." He smiled slightly.
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Authors: Demelza and X_tremeroswellian
Email(s): demelza81@yahoo.co.nz and X_tremeroswellian@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: The characters don't belong to us. They belong to Edward Allen Bernero and John Wells and a bunch of other people that we've never met before. Please don't sue.
Summary: Faith's home life becomes more troubled as she and Bosco grow closer together.
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: Up through and including "The Unforgiven."
Author's Note: This is the sixth story in a series of Third Watch fics we're writing titled "Wherever You Will Go." The first one is "Confessions," the second is "Here With Me," the third is "Pain," the fourth is "Tears," and the fifth is "Fear." You may want to read those first before continuing.
Sadness (Part Two)
Faith quietly unlocked the door to her family's apartment and stepped inside. She removed the keys from the lock and shut the door softly. She turned to see Fred sitting on the couch, in between Emily and Charlie, watching television. She stared at them for a long moment wordlessly, and swallowed hard. She shut her eyes, then opened them again. "Hi, guys."
Emily was quick to look at her mother and smile widely. While Fred slowly turned to her, half smile on his face. "How did it go?"
She nodded quickly, forcing a smile. "It was fine."
"Oh. So, you guys are all done with the questioning? You won't be called back in?"
"Not until the trial, hopefully."
"Hopefully." He nodded.
"Yeah." She let out a breath and sat down on the arm of the couch. "So what are you guys watching?"
Fred nodded toward the tv. "Camp Nowhere."
"It's a really great movie. I like Mud."
Faith smiled at her daughter and smoothed back the hair from her face. She looked at the screen for a second, then looked over at Fred again. "Everything go okay while I was gone?"
Fred nodded, his eyes shifting from the tv to his wife. He looked up at her, and smiled. "Yeah, fine. We've just been watching a couple movies."
She nodded. "Good..." She stood up and took a deep breath.
"You okay, hon?"
"Yeah, just...tired..."
"Mom, can we still go to McDonalds tonight?" Charlie asked, pleadingly.
Emily looked away from the tv to her brother, then up at her mom. "Can we, please?"
She smiled tiredly. "Yeah, of course."
Fred shook his head. "No, you can't," he said, looking up at Faith just as she spoke. "What, no, Faith, we can't afford it."
She looked at him, startled. "Fred, it's McDonalds...not Chanterelle's."
Fred frowned. "It's still too expensive. We can be saving the money for something else. Like a family meal out to one of those fancy restaurants."
"Mom, you promised," he whined.
"Yeah, Mom." Emily matched Charlie's whine.
"I know I did, Sweetie. You guys go get ready, okay?"
Fred glared at Faith as Emily jumped off the sofa and ran through to her and Charlie's room.
She turned around and headed for the kitchen.
"Faith!" he said loudly, climbing to his feet and followed her. "Don't walk away from me when we're having a discussion."
She sighed and continued into the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of aspirin from the cabinet above the sink and twisting off the top. "I promised them, all right?"
"I don't care," he said, lowering his voice, but keeping his angered tone. "We agreed to cut back on un-necessary spending. The kids can wait a few weeks, and we'll all go out to a nice meal."
She shook a couple of the aspirin out of the bottle and swallowed them down with a drink of water. "It's not that expensive. We can still go out in a few weeks," she said, shrugging.
Fred sighed angrily. "That's not the point."
She was starting to get annoyed herself, but she tried not to let the agitation show in her voice. "Then what is the point?"
"The point is, how are we supposed to save when you go off and waste money all the time?"
She stared at him. "Waste money? Fred, the only damned places I ever go are work and here."
"What about that damned gum your always chewing? And the food you buy on patrol?"
"Yeah, excuse me for eating," she muttered under her breath, turning away.
He angrily sighed, pulling her back around to face him. "Faith, I'm just saying it all adds up in the long run."
"So after tonight, we won't go out to McDonalds or anywhere else for awhile."
Fred sighed again. "If we want to save, it's the way it has to be. Money doesn't grow on trees. If you'd passed that exam, and were getting that extra money, we could be spending a little money every once and a while."
Her eyes narrowed. "So that's what this is about." She shook her head, feeling angry as she moved past him. "I should have known."
"Faith!" he said louder, finally turning to face her as she moved away. "We have to cut costs, that's all I'm saying."
Faith turned to face him. "Fine, you want to cut costs? Then don't go. I never said you had to," she said coolly, then turned away again and walked down the hallway toward their bedroom.
Fred angrily glared after her. He waited a moment, as though the wheels in his head were turning in thought and came to a sudden halt as he went after her. He walked down the hallway and angrily opened the door. A frown etched across his face, he stared at his wife.
Faith ignored his stare as she reached into her closet and pulled out a different shirt to wear, one that was a little less formal.
"You're not going. We can't afford it!"
She turned very slowly and glared at him. "You don't get to tell me what to do. You're my husband, not my owner."
"I bring in my share of the pay check, and I'm telling you, Faith, you are not taking those kids to McDonalds. We cannot afford it."
"I made a promise to my kids, and I'm going to keep it. Don't worry, Fred. I won't touch your money." She quickly changed shirts.
Charlie came into the room right then. "Can we go now?"
Fred shook his head at his wife, determined for her to listen to him. "You're not taking them," he told her, his tone a warning.
She raised an eyebrow at him, then looked at her son. "Yeah, we can go now." She walked toward the door without responding to her husband's warning.
Emily came running out of the room with her thick jacket on. She looked once at her dad, seeing the angered frown on his face, and followed her mom and brother.
"So what'd you guys do at school today?" she asked as they headed toward the run front door.
Fred stood in the doorway of his and Faith's bedroom, glaring after Faith.
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"Okay, what do you guys want to eat?" Faith asked as Emily and Charlie picked out a booth to sit at.
"Chicken McNugget Happy Meal!"
She nodded. "Em? "
Emily looked at her brother and smiled widely. "I'll have a cheeseburger Happy Meal," she said, turning back to her mom.
"Okay, two Happy Meals coming right up. I'll be right back."
"Okay," Emily agreed.
Charlie glanced over at his sister after his mom walked away. "Dad was really mad, wasn't he?"
Emily nodded, looking at their mother as she walked over and got in line to get their meals. She turned back to Charlie. "Yeah, he just wouldn't leave Mom alone."
He bit his lip and fiddled with the salt shaker on the table. "Why'd he get so mad?"
She shrugged, sitting back against the chair. "I don't know. Money, I think."
He sighed and laid his head down on the tabletop. "I wish we were rich."
"I don't."
He jerked his head up. "Why not?" he asked, confused.
"Because..." she said, sounding unsure. "If we were rich...Dad would just find something else to moan about."
"Why are you being so down on Dad now? I thought you liked him better than Mom."
They didn't see Faith standing a couple feet away. She swallowed hard, trying to push aside her son's words as she moved over to the table. "I forgot to ask what you guys wanted to drink."
Emily looked at Charlie with a concerned stare, then looked up at her mom. "Rasberry, if that's okay?"
She nodded. "That's fine. Charlie?"
Charlie glanced up at her. "Cherry coke."
Faith forced a smile, though she felt like her insides had been torn in half. "Okay." She turned and walked away from the table.
Emily waited until her mother was walking away before turning back to Charlie. She swung her foot and kicked him lightly. "Good one, Charlie, Mom might have heard."
He rolled his eyes. "She didn't."
"But she could have. Didn't think of that though, did you?" she bit back, slamming her back into the chair angrily.
"What's your problem? Jeez. I just said the truth."
"So what. You don't *know* the truth," she stated, sitting back against the seat and glaring at him.
Charlie glared back at her. "Whatever."
Faith approached the table a moment later and glanced back and forth between the two of them. "Everything okay here?"
Emily glared harder at Charlie. "Fine."
Faith took a deep breath and handed Charlie his Happy Meal box, then handed Emily hers. She sat down on the seat next to her son and folded her hands on the table.
Emily gratefully and silently took her Happy Meal box and opened it. She thanked her mom, and proceeded to remove its contents.
Faith swallowed hard as she looked at her daughter. "I'll uh...be right back, okay? I need to use the restroom."
Emily nodded. "Okay."
She stood up and headed back toward the bathroom.
Faith locked herself in the bathroom and stared at her reflection in the mirror for a long moment. Charlie's words echoed in her mind. //Why are you being so down on Dad now? I thought you liked him better than Mom.// She leaned back against the door and slid down to the ground. Pulling her knees to her chest, she laid her head on her arms and began to cry.
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Bosco had been driving around ever since he dropped Faith off at her place. He just didn't feel like going home. Or anywhere else for that matter. After awhile, he somehow found himself at McDonalds. He immediately spotted the Yokas's truck in the parking lot. Without thinking about it, he pulled his car into the parking lot and parked right next to their vehicle. He shut off his car, but remained sitting in the driver's seat, his hand gripping the steering wheel tightly. He swallowed hard, trying to decide whether or not to go in.
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Charlie frowned and looked across the table at his sister. "Is she not gonna eat?"
"She's just using the bathroom Charlie," she replied, not really answering him.
"Yeah, but she didn't bring anything back when she brought our food," he pointed out.
Emily finally met his eyes, and then looked at the table. He was right. "I'm gonna go see if she's okay," she said, quickly getting up from the booth and finding her way to the ladies bathroom. There, she knocked on the door. "Mom?" she asked.
Faith took a deep breath, startled to hear her daughter's voice right outside the door. "I'll be out in just a minute, Em," she said, glad that her voice was calmer than her emotions.
"Are you okay?" she asked again, sounding worried.
"Yeah, sweetie, I'm fine," she answered, closing her eyes tightly.
"Are you sure? Because you looked upset before."
She rose to her feet and turned the water faucet on. She splashed a few handfuls of cold water on her face and then wiped off the excess water with a paper towel. She looked at herself in the mirror again, glad there was no visible evidence of her crying bout. She took a deep breath and opened the door, smiling warmly at Emily. "I'm okay. Just had a little too much caffeine today, that's all." She placed a hand on her daughter's shoulder.
Emily nodded, smiling up at her mom. "Hey, Mom..."
"Yeah?"
"I'm sorry."
Faith looked at her in surprise. "For what?"
"For everything."
She paused, then stopped walking toward the table. "You don't have anything to apologize for, Em. You didn't do anything wrong," she said softly, shaking her head.
She shook her own head. "Yeah, I did, I haven't been very nice to you lately."
Faith bit her lip, but smiled at her daughter. She gently tucked a strand of dark hair behind Emily's ear. "It's okay. I'm not upset with you," she assured her.
Emily smiled up at her mom and looked over at the table where Charlie was eating his chicken nuggets. "So, why didn't you get anything to eat?"
"I'm just not very hungry. I guess I'm still full from lunch," she said, shrugging slightly. Then she paused again. Had she even eaten lunch? She couldn't remember..
"Well, you can have some of my fries if you want. I don't always eat them."
She smiled slightly."Yeah, we'll see. Let's get back to the table before your food gets cold, okay?"
Emily nodded. "Okay," she said, smiling widely, and walking back to the table.
Faith swallowed hard, trying to push away the sadness that was still churning inside her. Then she forced a smile onto her face and sat back down next to Charlie. "Is it any good?" she asked him, elbowing him in the arm.
Charlie looked up at her and grinned, his mouth too full to talk. "Mmm-hmm."
She chuckled.
Emily opened the wrapper on her burger, and picked up the fries with her other hand, extending one to her mom. "Want one?" she asked, taking a mouthful of her burger.
Faith accepted a fry from her and ate it quickly.
"So, at school today..." she said, munching on a full mouth of food. "This boy in my class, Brodie, he got suspended..."
"What for?"
She swallowed the food and took a sip of her rasberry. "He was caught looking up all the girls' dresses."
Faith stared at her. "He what?"
"We were all standing in line for lunch, and he went behind us pulling up our dresses and looking under them. He's suspended for three weeks. Didn't Dad tell you? I gave him the note from the principal."
"No, he didn't tell me," she answered, trying her best to keep her anger out of her tone.
Emily looked at her curiously. "He should have, both parents are supposed to see the note. Principal Gatby wants to talk to you both tomorrow afternoon."
Son of a bitch, she cursed inwardly. She took a deep breath and nodded. "I'll talk to your dad when we go home," she said, giving her daughter a small smile.
"Okay," Emily said, drinking more of her drink.
Charlie glanced over at her. "When we're done eating, can we go play in the playplace?" he asked, hint of pleading to his voice.
Faith turned her head to look at him. "Yeah, of course."
Emily shook her head at Charlie. "You are such a child," she playfully remarked.
He stuck his tongue out at her.
Faith grinned and shook her head.
Emily poked her tongue back, before settling back in the seat more comfortably. "Mom...can I ask you something?"
"Sure, Sweetie. What's on your mind?"
She swallowed, looking at her mom. "Are you and Dad going to get a divorce?"
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With a resolved sigh, Bosco gave into his need to see Faith, even if it meant seeing Fred, too. He walked inside the door and over toward the booth where they were sitting. They hadn't noticed his presence yet. He idely wondered where Fred was when he heard Emily's question. He froze, waiting for Faith's response.
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The smile faded from Faith's face as she realized both of her children were looking at her, waiting for a reponse. She looked down at the table top for a long moment before looking at Emily again. "No, honey. Your dad and I aren't getting a divorce."
Emily nodded, noting a change in her mother's voice. She hadn't meant to ask, but with all the problems lately, she did wonder. So did Charlie, if any of their late night talks during their parents' usual fighting matches were anything to go by. She took another sip of her drink, and had only let go of the straw when she looked over to where Charlie was when a familiar sight caught her eyes. "Uncle Bosco!?"
Faith felt her her heart skip a beat as she looked over her shoulder and saw him standing there. Their eyes locked. She swallowed hard, the sadness inside her deepening a little more.
Bosco swallowed, forcing a smile. He'd overheard, and after what he and Faith had been through, he still couldn't really believe her reply. He had hoped, ever so hoped, but to hear her say those words. He casually walked over.
"Bosco! Want some fries?"
"Sure." He smiled, sitting beside Emily as she moved over to make room for him.
Faith looked at him briefly, offering a short smile. "Hey," she said softly.
He smiled over at her. "Hey," he said back, taking one of the fries that Charlie had offered.
Charlie grinned at him. "Look at my Spiderman toy!" he said, holding up the packaged toy that came with his meal.
Bosco grinned back. "Cool toy! What did you get, Em?" he asked, turning to Emily.
Emily used her finger to push the toy out from under a napkin. "Same as Charlie," she said, sighing slightly.
Faith looked at her. "Do you want me to see if I can trade it in for one of the barbie toys?"
Emily looked at Charlie, then turned back to her mom. She nodded. "Can you?" she asked in a nice manner.
She nodded. "Sure." She took the toy from her daughter and stood up quickly. Almost immediately the room began to spin and she grabbed the back of the booth for support so she didn't fall.
Bosco quickly stood up, putting his hand on Faith's back. "You okay, partner?" he asked, moving around her to check if she was okay.
She closed her eyes and nodded. "Yeah, I just...stood up too fast."
He took one more look at her before removing his hand. "Are you sure? I can go exchange the toy, I've got to get myself something to eat anyway."
She opened her eyes and looked at him, still feeling off-balance. "Actually, I think I'll take you up on that offer."
He nodded and helped her sit back down. He took Emily's toy and had just turned on his heel when he turned back again. "Get you a drink or something?"
Faith shook her head. "Nah, I'm good. Thanks."
"You sure? What about you kids, need a refill? Anything else to eat?"
"I'm sure, Boz. Thanks."
Charlie grinned. "Can I get another cherry pepsi?"
Bosco smiled at Faith, and nodded to Charlie. "Yep. What about you, Emily?"
Emily sipped the last of her rasberry and handed him the carton. "Can I have the same as Charlie?"
Bosco nodded again. "Sure. Be right back then."
He went over and waited in line, running the orders through his mind so not to forget exactly what Emily and Charlie had asked for. The line moved forward and as he waited, he turned to look over at Faith. He was worried, not knowing exactly why she had gotten dizzy like that, even if she did say it was only because she had stood too fast. Why don't I believe you? he asked inwardly, just watching her.
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Over at the table, Emily had just about finished her fries. She was really worried about her mom. "Mom, are you feeling okay?" she asked.
Faith looked at her, surprised. "Yeah, honey, I'm fine."
"Are you sure? You don't look that well."
She swallowed hard. "I'm okay. Just didn't sleep very well last night. Nothing to worry about," she said, trying to sound assuring.
Emily nodded, but even she didn't believe her mother's words.
Charlie sat back against his seat and looked at his mom. His sister was right; she didn't look very well. He frowned but remained silent.
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Bosco was only in line for another few minutes before he was up to the counter and ordering the Cherry Coke's for both Emily and Charlie. He ordered a couple Big Mac's for himself, along with a hashbrown, large fries and a large Coke. He also ordered a second packet of large fries for Emily and Charlie. He exchanged Emily's Spiderman toy for a Barbie one. After paying for the goods, he scooped up the tray they had all been placed on and walked back to the booth and sat down. "Here ya go..." he said, handing the drinks out to both children, and handing them the second packet of fries. "Thought you guys might like some more."
"Thanks, Bosco! You're the coolest!" Charlie exclaimed.
Emily quickly reached out for a few fries and shoved them in her mouth. "Thanks, Bosco!"
Faith looked at him gratefully. "Thanks."
Bosco smiled, unwrapping his first burger. "Sure thing. You sure you don't want anything? I can go back up there."
She shook her head. "No, I'm good. Thanks."
He smiled again. "Okay."
Charlie quickly wolfed down his drink and some of the fries Bosco had brought over for them. Then he squirmed in his seat and looked at him mom. "Can I go play in the playplace now?"
Faith gave him a small smile and nodded. "Sure."
"Thanks, Mom!"
"You be careful," Bosco said to Charlie, not even waiting until he'd swallowed what was in his mouth.
Faith stood up to let him out, her hand gripping onto the back of the booth tightly. "Don't forget to take your shoes off!" she called after him as he took off running.
Emily sat next to Bosco, just shaking her head. He looked at her, however, as if wondering why she hadn't gone with Charlie. "It's for kids," she said, as if knowing what he was thinking.
Faith raised an eyebrow and looked at her.
"I'm twelve, Mom, not a kid."
She smiled. "Which is why you were playing in it just a few weeks ago when we were here last."
Emily's jaw dropped open, but she couldn't find the words to fight that statement. So instead she just sipped more of her drink.
Faith supressed the urge to start laughing. "Em, if you want to go play, it's all right."
Bosco looked between mother and daughter, trying hard himself not to laugh.
Emily looked at her mother, then at Bosco. "Can I get past, please?" she asked quietly, as if a little embarassed to admit she wanted to go play.
Faith bit her lip to keep herself from laughing as her daughter quickly scooted out of the booth as Bosco stood up to let her out. She watched as Emily turned and hurried off in the same direction Charlie had gone moments before. She let out a deep breath as she turned back to face her partner.
Bosco sat back down at the booth and looked over at Faith, not saying a word, just worry running through his mind. He really didn't know what to say, but just look at her.
She tucked a strand of loose hair behind her ear and looked down at the table for a moment. "So I guess you changed your mind about coming."
He nodded, clearing his throat a little. "Yeah. I hope you don't mind...?"
She quickly shook her head. "No, not at all. I..uh...I'm glad you're here." She forced a smile and looked up at him.
He smiled back. "So, how come you're here alone with the kids? I thought Fred was coming."
"Yeah, well. Apparently we can't afford to be here," she muttered, rolling her eyes.
Bosco scoffed, scrunching the napkin in front of him up into the ball of his hand in anger. "McDonalds, as in, the cheapest burgers on the planet McDonalds?" he asked, his tone sarcastic.
She sat back against the booth. "The very one."
He shook his head again. "I knew he was tight, but that tight is ridiculous, Faith."
"Yeah, that's what I said." She grimaced as the pounding in her head started again.
"So what happened?" he asked, sitting back.
She shrugged. "I just told him if he didn't want to come, he didn't have to."
"Well, I'm glad he didn't come." He paused at that statement, before continuing. "I mean, so that you get to spend time with Em and Charlie by yourself."
Charlie's words flashed into her mind again. //Why are you being so down on Dad now? I thought you liked him better than Mom.//
Faith looked down at the table, swallowing hard. "Yeah," she said softly.
"Are you okay?" he asked, leaning forward over the table a little.
She nodded, but remained quiet.
Bosco reached his hand out and touched hers. "Faith...please, tell me what's wrong...?" he asked, hating seeing her like this.
She shifted in her seat, holding her breath and trying not to cry. She shook her head. "It's nothing."
He searched her eyes, and he knew that there was something wrong. "Come on, Faith, tell me."
She met his eyes, unable to stop a tear from dropping down onto her cheek. "Damn it," she muttered, quickly wiping it away with the back of her hand.
"Hey, it's okay..." he said, gently squeezing her hand. "You're allowed to cry. I just wish I knew what was wrong."
"It's Emily," she said finally, wiping away another tear as it fell.
"Emily?" he asked, sounding a little shocked. "What did she say?"
She shook her head. "It's nothing she said...I just...overheard the kids talking..." She looked away, out the window, trying as hard as she could not to breakdown right in the middle of McDonalds. "She hates me," she whispered.
Bosco was taken aback. "She what? No, Faith, she doesn't hate you."
"Maybe hate's too strong a word." She swallowed hard, resting her forehead on one hand. "But she doesn't like me. At all. I mean, I don't blame her. How could she? You know, I'm never around...I'm never there for them when they need me. I haven't been a very good mother."
"Faith, that's a lie," he told her, squeezing her hand again. "You've been the best mother you can be, she knows that. Those kids adore you, Charlie and Emily *both*. Faith, listen to me, she understands, she loves you, and she understands," he repeated.
Faith shook her head, her eyes full of tears. "I don't think so, Bosco."
"Kids are kids, Faith. They go through stages of not liking their parents. It's the cycle. Father and son, mother and daughter... she loves you. Don't you ever doubt that. Not even for a minute."
She swallowed hard. "Yeah, well...I know she adores Fred."
"Well, one day she'll see him for his true colors."
Faith stared down at the table. "He's a good father, Bosco."
"I don't care. The minute those kids see how he treats you, in their eyes he'll no longer be the saint they think he is."
She looked up at him, realizing he was speaking from personal experience. "Sorry, Boz..." she said quietly, cursing herself inwardly for bringing up the subject at all.
He swallowed, shaking his head. "Don't. Just, I don't want you thinking Emily hates you. If you want to know how she feels, just ask her. But I know she doesn't hate you."
She bit her lip, trying to smile, but not quite succeeding. "I hope you're right."
"Trust me, Faith," he said, sqeezing her hand again.
Her lower lip trembled and she looked down again, trying not to cry.
Bosco squeezed her hand again. "It's okay..." he said, trying to reassure her.
She couldn't stop the tears from running down her cheeks. " I don't know what the hell is wrong with me today," she said, shaking her head as she wiped at the tears with her hand.
"Well, you've been through a lot lately, it's perfectly understandable."
"Yeah, well, I've been through a lot before when--" She cut herself off. "I've been through a lot before and it's never affected me like this."
"When what?"
She met his eyes, startled that'd he caught her slip. "Just a lot before. With Fred when he was drinking and...just a lot of stuff."
He didn't believe her. "Oh. Well, this isn't like that, this is more...different situations."
She looked down at the table, taking a deep breath. "Yeah."
"You can talk about it, you know. With me. I'm always here to listen."
"I just...haven't been sleeping well lately. I don't know. It's just stress." She leaned back in the booth again.
Bosco sat backwards himself. "Well, I wish you'd let me help you."
She looked at him, feeling sad. "You do," she said softly.
"How, when you won't tell me what's wrong?" he asked, sadly.
She felt her eyes fill with tears again. "I just--I can't, Bosco. I'm sorry. I want to, I just can't."
He mentally kicked himself for making her cry. "Don't be sorry...I shouldn't push you. I know that, I'm sorry."
Faith bit her lip. "It's okay. I know it's just because you're worried," she said tiredly.
"But still..." He leaned back against the booth. "I don't know that I can eat anything else." He sighed, pushing the tray away from him.
"Yeah, well, you had enough food there to feed an army, Boz," she said, smiling slightly.
He grinned. "And yet, I still couldn't finish it," he said sighing with a laugh.
Faith took a deep breath and released it slowly. "Did you get your invitation to the policeman's ball?"
Bosco nodded quickly. "Yeah, mail yesterday. You?"
She nodded. "Yeah, this morning."
"You going?" he asked.
She shrugged. "I don't know. Are you?"
"Maybe. I'm not sure."
"Yeah..." She looked out the window. "Looks like it's going to rain again."
Bosco looked out the window, too, but only for a moment before looking back at her. "Yeah. Torrential downpours, the reporter said on the news."
"Great," she muttered. "With all this rain, I'm starting to think we're gonna drown."
Bosco couldn't hold back a snicker. "Just mother nature taking its course."
She didn't smile. "Yeah, well, I'm sick of all the storms," she said, her voice quiet, distant.
"It'll pass," he said. "So, what do you have planned for tomorrow....?" he asked.
"Apparently Fred and I are supposed to be going to Emily's school to talk to her principal, which he failed to mention to me."
"What? Why do you have to go to the school, or for that matter... why the hell didn't he tell you?"
She shrugged. "I don't know. He probably just forgot." Her jaw clenched. "Some boy at her school was going around looking up all the girl's dresses today."
Bosco cringed at the thought. "What a pervert. Hope they suspend him."
"Three day suspension." She shook her head. "He should be expelled," she said angrily.
"Tell them that tomorrow. The kid should be. When I was seven, this boy at my school did the same thing, he was never allowed back in the school."
"Oh, believe me, I'm gonna tell them. If he's allowed back, who knows what he'll do next," she said tensely.
All Bosco could do was nod.
She closed her eyes momentarily, then opened them again. "Bosco, I'm sorry."
"For what?"
"For being lousy dinner company."
He laughed slightly. "You weren't," he promised.
She almost smiled. "I promise to be in a better mood for our next shift together."
He just smiled, and slowly turned the drink of coke around that he hadn't even touched yet.
She hesitated. "I should round up the kids and head home before it pours."
Bosco nodded. "I'll go get them."
She shook her head. "Nah, it's okay." She swallowed hard, looked away. "Thanks for being here, Bosco."
"Sure thing. I enjoyed the company."
"No, I meant...For being here for me," she said softly.
He nodded, smiling. "Anytime, you know I'll always be here for you."
"I know." She rose to her feet and instantly felt another dizzy spell wash over her as her head pounded. She grabbed her head in one hand as she sat back down, hard on the booth.
"Faith!" he almost shouted. "Are you okay?"
She grimaced at the pain. "Yeah...my head is just....I've had this headache all day."
"What, why didn't you tell me? I've got some aspirin if you want some?" he asked, taking the small container of pills out of his inner jacket pocket. "Here, take it with some of my coke."
"I took advil a couple hours ago," she said, shaking her head.
"Well, one more won't hurt."
She nodded and took the bottle from him. She quickly removed the lid and shook two pills out, then swallowed them down with his drink.
"If it doesn't work, you might need to try some extra strength excederin later tonight."
Faith looked at him and opened her mouth to speak, then hesitated.
He looked at her, somewhat squinting. "No, what?"
"I...uh...I'm not sure I should be driving right now."
He nodded. "That's okay. I'll drive you home, then I'll come back in a cab to get my car."
She swallowed hard. "I'm sorry, I know it's a lot of trouble...it's just...the kids are with me...if it was just me, I wouldn't ask."
"Faith, it's fine. And, if it was just you, I wouldn't let you drive home anyway."
She met his eyes and nodded, feeling that sadness stir within her again. "Thanks, Boz."
"Anytime." He smiled slightly.
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