Title: The Agony of Waiting
Authors: clarksmuseand xtremeroswellia
Fandoms: Supernatural/Smallville
Pairing: Sam Winchester/Chloe Sullivan
Rating: NC-17 for angst and lots of sex
Prompt: #14 - pregnancy scare - for sam_slut_a_thon
Disclaimer: Yeah, we don’t own these characters. At all. Please don’t sue. Thanks!
A/N: This is a sequel to Playing with Fire. Feedback is both addictive and necessary!
Sam tried Chloe's cell for the tenth time, and got another voicemail message. He sighed, shutting his phone off and putting it back in his pocket. Despite the fact that he was himself again, Dean and Bobby having expelled the demon possessing his body, he knew what had happened between Chloe and the thing using his body to abuse her.
Trudging up the stairs to her apartment door, he knocked, praying she'd be home. She hadn't returned any of his voicemails or emails, and quite frankly, not hearing from her hurt. Not that he could blame her: after all, he thought, that demon had taken advantage of her, using his body as the weapon. His heart sank further into his body as he waited for her to open the door. Begged inwardly for her to be there, to forgive him... to love him. Because he loved her. It was really as plain as that.
A moment later, she opened the door, her eyes registering surprise as she found herself face to face with him. "Sam. Hi."
A shy, uncertain smile crossed his face. "Hey, Chloe," he whispered, scanning her face as if seeing it for the first time. She looked worried and pale. Probably didn't want to see him, either, he thought as he shoved his hands into his pockets. "How... are you?"
"I'm fine," she said quickly, swallowing hard. "How are you?"
He looked down at his feet, unsure how to answer the question. Horrible, he thought. Lonely, miserable, pathetic. Sorry. "Fine, too," he said instead, watching his foot scrape against the floor. "I know I have no excuse to ask this, but... can I come in?"
"Yeah, of course." Biting her lower lip she slowly stepped aside to let him in.
Sam hesitated before taking a step inside, carefully avoiding her physically as he did. The last thing he wanted was for her to think he was just there for sex. Though, yeah, he wanted her, snuck a look over her body and felt his body ache with need, he knew he needed to beg for forgiveness for what he'd done to her. And then let her go, if she wanted that.
It had been a long month since... He bit his lip, putting thoughts of the *last time* out of his mind.
"So..." She let out a slow breath, looking hesitant. "What…happened, exactly?"
"Exactly?" Sam replied in hushed tones. "I was possessed by a demon." His gaze focused on her floor, counting the tiles on her ceramic kitchen floor.
A wry smile touched her lips. "Yeah, I figured that out. Why did it pick you? Or...is that an unknown?" She slowly headed toward the fridge. "You want something to drink?"
"A beer would be great," he replied, his legs rooted to his spot just inside the apartment. He shut the door and watched her move into the kitchen. "The demon... it was one Dean had exorcised last year. She... wanted payback, I guess." Though at what price, he had yet to figure out. It wasn't like Dean was talking to him, either.
Looking puzzled, Chloe pulled a beer out of the fridge and handed it to him, their fingers brushing slightly. She swallowed hard. "So wait...when you exorcise a demon...it can come back in someone else?"
Touching her was a bad idea, he groaned, feeling waves of lust hit his groin at her fingers light against his. "Yeah, it can. Never thought that would happen to me, though." He took a long sip of his beer, eyeing her carefully. She looked like she hadn't been eating much lately, though her body was no less appealing to him. "What's happening with you?" he whispered.
She was silent for a moment. "Um...a lot of stuff," she murmured, tucking some hair behind her ear and not quite meeting his eyes.
He looked away and took another long drink. "I'm sure being here isn't helping, either." He shoved the rest of the beer down his throat. This had been a mistake, he thought, putting the empty bottle on the counter. Chloe hadn't called him, not made any contact whatsoever... if *that* wasn't a sign, then he didn't know what was.
"I'm sorry," he muttered, "for everything. I wanted to make things right, but... I'll leave you alone."
Her eyes widened with surprise. "No, you don't have to go. Look, things here have been kinda...insane." She rubbed the back of her neck tiredly. "And...you don't have to apologize, okay? It wasn't you."
"Yes I do, Chloe," he replied, moving to her and nearly touching her with his outstretched hand. "I was awake during..." He grimaced in pain. "and there was nothing I could do about it. I just... I hope your busy life hasn't been compromised because of me."
Chloe gazed into his eyes for a moment, then hesitantly reached out and touched his hand, sliding her fingers through it. "It's still not your fault."
Her touch humbled him; he pulled her into his arms, wrapping her into his body, putting to rest an ache he had lived with ever since he had realized what happened. He planted a gentle kiss to her head. "I don't like hurting the people I love," he muttered, the words spilling from his lips unheeded.
She felt the breath catch in her throat. "People you..." She swallowed hard, slowly pulling away to look at him, searching his eyes.
A small smile crossed his features when Sam realized what he'd said. "Love, Chloe. I love you." his hands cupped her cheeks as he gazed into her eyes earnestly, searching for some sign she felt the same and could return them.
Wordlessly, she rose up on her tiptoes and kissed him softly, touching his cheek. Her heart thudded heavily against her chest.
His hands drifted to her waist, grabbing her hips and pressing her against him as he returned her kisses with a passion he had never felt before. She wasn't running away, he kept repeating to himself, lips moving in time with hers. Maybe...
"You're so beautiful," he whispered, pulling back to look at her. "Even if you're... pale."
Chloe bit her lower lip. "Yeah, it's kinda...been a stressful month," she confessed, her voice very soft.
Sam wanted to ease her stress away in many different ways that involved both of them naked, but he tried to resist. Instead, he lightly ground his arousal into her stomach, letting her know of his physical state just by being close to her. "Want to tell me about it?" he whispered in her ear.
The words not really immediately came to mind. Instead of saying that, she hesitantly took him by the hand and led him out to the sofa, sitting down nervously. "Sam, there's something you should know and I...don't really know how to say it, so...I'm just gonna..." She blew out a breath. "I'm late."
Sam shook his head in confusion. "Late? What do you --?" The words died in his throat when he realized what she was talking about. And then he remembered. The last time they were... together, the thing inhabiting his body didn't bother using a condom. "Oh shit," he muttered, his gaze settling on her.
Chloe looked down at the floor. "Yeah. But it doesn't mean anything for sure. It could be...other things."
Sam swallowed hard and squeezed her hand. "Have you... I mean, do you need to take a pregnancy test... just to be sure?"
The quiet worry in his voice made her look up. "I haven't yet, no," she whispered. "But...it's probably a good idea."
"Just to be sure," he replied, "because... we need to know." Standing up, he offered her his hand. "Want me to take you to get one? I've got the Impala." His lips quirked, remembering how much Dean protested his taking the beloved car.
"I have one here," she said quietly. "I just haven't taken it."
"Oh." Sam looked down at their joined hands and reluctantly let her go. "Guess now's better than later, right? I mean, couldn't stress make you late?"
"Apparently first thing in the morning is when the results are the most accurate." She bit her lip. "Where are you guys staying?"
"I'm alone, Chloe. Dean's still on a hunt, and I didn't want to wait to see you again." He colored a little, realizing he needed to get a place to stay, unless she'd let him crash on her couch. Funny, he thought, after everything they had been through, all the intense moments, he was too embarrassed to ask her if he could stay. He rubbed his neck, an attack of shyness coming on.
"Oh," she said softly, her face registering surprise. "Well, then you can stay here. I mean, unless you're...needing to get back to Dean."
"No, Dean's fine without me." There was note of sadness in his voice. "That is, I'd rather be with you than my dork-face brother."
A smile tugged at her lips. "What's he hunting?"
Sam grinned. "Some hot brunette he picked up in a bar." He dared to look into her eyes and saw something mirrored there, something indescribable.
She laughed out loud. "That sounds like Dean. What happened to Jo? Or is he still clueless?"
Touching her cheek, he whispered, "I think he liked her for about two seconds, even though she still thinks they're an item. She's definitely not his type." Sam leaned in to kiss her quickly.
Her eyes drifted shut and she returned the kiss without hesitation, her forehead leaning against his.
Groaning, Sam ran his tongue against her lower lip, seeking entrance to her mouth. When she yielded to his request, he pulled her closer to him, sliding his tongue into her mouth and deepening their kisses.
God, she'd missed him. Sliding her arms around his neck, she melted against him. "Sam," she whispered.
"I need you," he muttered against her mouth. He pulled her body on top of his, so she was straddling his waist. Gripping her hips, he moaned when he lips moved from his mouth and trailed down his neck gently.
"Bedroom," she murmured against his skin. She closed her eyes when he lifted her up in his arms and carried her down the hall.
Sam's eyes glittered with the love and lust he felt for her as he gently laid her on her bed, keeping the nightstand light on. "I want to see you," he whispered, shrugging off his shirt as he spoke. He then pulled off her shoes and slid his hands up her naked legs. "And this time, I'm prepared."
Chloe swallowed hard, suddenly feeling hesitant, consciously aware of the still-healing wound beneath her collarbone. "Me too, actually." She pulled open the nightstand drawer, revealing a box of condoms.
Sam didn't know whether to laugh or frown, so he simply looked at her knowingly. "At least we won't have to get any more for... a few days." His dimpled smile broke onto his face as his hands drifted up her skirt, stroking her inner thighs. "No panties," he murmured, moving his hands to unzip her skirt.
She bit her lower lip, lifting her hips to help him undress her. "Underwear is overrated," she said lightly.
"Damn straight," he growled, running his hand over her mound and pressing his thumb against her clit, gently rubbing. His cock strained against his fly at her body's surprised jerk. Adding fuel to her fire, he leaned in and licked her inner thigh.
Chloe whimpered, shutting her eyes tightly as she tangled her hands in his hair. "Sam."
Sam moved up her body, unbuttoning her blouse as he went. "Yeah?" he whispered, his lips coming to hover above hers. His jean-clad hips settled between her thighs, grinding into her slowly as he ran his hands through her hair.
She pressed her lips against his, pulling him closer and trying to prolong the inevitable. "You're wearing too many clothes."
Their lips clung to each other, as if trying to devour the other person. Sam wanted to make this last forever, though he growled, "Then why don't you take them off?" He continued his heated, hard kisses, though, his body on fire for her.
Slowly sitting up, she reached out and undid the button on his jeans and eased the zipper down.
He shivered with pleasure as she released his hard cock, feeling it bounce against her body. His lips teased her neck, sucking on the tender spot her knew always turned her on. "Much better," he moaned, his hands moving to her breasts.
She forced herself to take a deep breath as he started to push her blouse off her shoulders. She whimpered involuntarily when one of his thumbs brushed over her nipple.
He enjoyed the noises she made and teased her nipple again, making it hard and ripe for his mouth. "I love your noises," he whispered, licking his lips and taking her nipple into his mouth, nipping and sucking as his cock ground into her. He felt her hands running along his naked back and shivered, feeling goose bumps where her fingers had been.
Closing her eyes, she laid her head back on the pillow, moaning as his hardness pressed against her belly and his lips tugged lightly at her nipple. His touches and caresses were gentle, but filled with need at the same time.
"Chloe," he whispered, his lips still at her breast as one hand drifted to the vee of her thighs, a finger entering her hot core. He groaned when her inner muscles tightened around his finger, stroking him as he moved in and out slowly.
She bit down hard on her lip, lifting her hips to get closer to his hand. "Sam, please," she whimpered. "More."
"Tell me," he insisted, adding a finger inside her, letting her hips ride his fingers, getting her ready for his thick hardness.
She groaned, her breathing heavy and unsteady. "I want you inside me."
He smiled, watching her writhe as if in pain. "Hand me a condom, then," he replied, just as anxious to be inside her. Her inner muscles stroked his fingers so fast, he wondered if she would come. He increased the rhythm a little, looking up and at her face.
Whimpering, she reached her arm out toward the drawer without thinking about how exposed the wound would be as pleasure began to tingle throughout her body.
A spot on her shoulder caught Sam's eye, temporarily halting his sweet torture of Chloe's body. He wondered how he hadn't seen it and why she took the trouble to hide it from him. However, when she whimpered, Sam slid his fingers out of her, wiping his fingers on his discarded shirt and taking the thin foil from her trembling hand, tearing it open and rolling it on him.
Chloe reached her arms out toward him, kissing him softly as he slowly slid inside her, making them both groan. She shuddered as their bodies intertwined, becoming one again.
He waited a moment for her to adjust to his length and thickness, as it had been awhile since they were last together. "You okay?" he whispered, biting her earlobe a little as he savored the feel of his body encased within hers.
"I'm good," she whispered, slowly winding her arms around his neck, her fingers threading through his hair.
He briefly wondered about the wound on her shoulder but when her hips moved against him, taking him in deeper inside, he lost all thought. Sliding in and out, he set a slow, steady rhythm, their breathing shallow and ragged as he felt their bodies fuse into one. "God," he moaned, closing his eyes as he listened to her soft noises, arousing him harder, making him go faster.
She wound her legs around his waist, rocking against him, her body growing more tense with pressure. "Sam," she whimpered.
He moaned at the sound of his name on her lips and plunged into her, riding her hard and fast until he felt her climax hitting her, making her body arch off the bed with its ferocity. "Chloe," he rasped, digging his hands into the bed sheets on both sides of her body as he released himself into the condom, then collapsing next to her body, spent and satisfied.
Shuddering, she shut her eyes once more as she waited for her breath to return to normal. Turning on her side, she rested a hand on his chest.
Peeling the used condom off his cock, Sam moved away from her long enough to dispose of it. Taking her hand, the one that was on his chest, he slipped beneath it again, letting it rest on his body. Once again, he noticed the small oval wound but said nothing. "You look satisfied," Sam said smugly, his eyes wide with contentment.
She chuckled faintly. "So do you."
"Maybe it's because I am," he replied, winking at her and scooting his body closer to hers.
"Well, that's good to know," she whispered, curling against him.
Feeling her relaxing against him, Sam kissed her gently and whispered, "Get some sleep." He pulled a blanket over them to keep her warm.
Her eyes drifted shut as she lay curled against him comfortably. And within moments she was fast asleep.
Sleep came slowly for Sam, however. He watched her sleep, her face angelic and perfect, and wondered what tomorrow would bring. Would he be a father or not? Would she want him around if she was carrying his child?
&&&&&
Morning came too quickly and found her standing in the bathroom, staring at the test she'd taken. Even though it was only a ten minute wait, it already felt like an eternity.
Sent at 5:08 PM on Tuesday
Sam rested against the headboard of the bed, trying to remain calm though he was anything but. His eyes kept straying to the closed door, where he knew Chloe was waiting for the pregnancy results. He always came back to the question: what do I do if she's pregnant?
Damn, Dean was going to kill him.
She slowly stepped out of the bathroom, knowing the ten minute wait would seem much longer if she just stood there. "Sam? You want some coffee?"
"Sure," he replied, swinging his long legs over the bed and onto the floor, searching for his jeans. "Want some help with that?"
"Making coffee?" Her voice was light, teasing. "I think I can get it, but you're welcome to watch."
A lazy smile graced his lips, hiding the tension he felt inside. Moving back to the bed, he sprawled on his back and whispered, "Maybe I'll just watch... you."
Tilting her head to one side, she smiled faintly. "So you like to watch?"
His eyes darkened with mischief, trailing slowly down her body -- clad only in his button-down shirt, dwarfing her small frame.
"Guess I have my answer," she said with a wide grin. She winked at him and headed out of the room and down the hall toward the kitchen.
Damn, he groaned, his thoughts turning to the night before, watching her hips sway enticingly away and remembering how she'd felt underneath him. He cleared his throat quietly, trying to focus on the situation at hand.
Chloe returned less than five minutes later, carrying two mugs of coffee. She moved to the bed and handed one to him, exhaling slowly as she perched on the edge of the bed.
Immediately a large hand softly touched her shoulder. "It's going to be okay," he whispered lamely, not knowing what else to say. He took a sip of his coffee, thoughtful for a moment.
A small, wry smile touched her lips. "Maybe."
Hand slipping away, he turned to look at her. "If you're..." He could hardly say the word. "What are you going to do?"
"I don't know," she admitted, glancing at him.
Her sad, frightened stare nearly undid him: Sam kept her gaze, even though every instinct told him to look away. Then he remembered the small, round wound on her right shoulder. Reaching over, he pulled his shirt over her shoulder and whispered, "What happened to you?"
Chloe flinched visibly, her face paling a little. "Long story," she whispered, her gaze shifting to the clock.
"Sorry," he replied, releasing her. It was pretty obvious she didn't want to tell him. "Didn't mean to pry." He took another sip of the coffee.
"It's all right. I just...need to focus on...this other thing right now," she said quietly.
Sam paled and rubbed a hand over his face. That was just another reminder of how much he really wasn't a part of her life. No matter how much he wanted to be.
"It's time," she said very softly, setting her mug down on the nightstand and heading for the bathroom slowly. Please God let it be negative, she thought, her heart pounding heavily in her chest.
Sam held his breath, literally, not moving from the bed. Instead, he watched her walk into the bathroom. Waiting for the results was worse than fighting the Demon, he thought.
She drew in a deep breath and looked down at the test that lay on the sink. There was a small minus sign. "Sam? It's negative."
He stood up suddenly, the air leaving his lungs in a rush of sound. "It is?" He grabbed his jeans and yanked them on. He didn't know whether to be disappointed or relieved. At least Dean won't kill me, he mused with a small smile.
"Yeah." She picked the test up and threw it in the garbage can, letting out a relieved breath. She slowly turned to see him standing in the doorway.
His hand absently rubbed the back of his neck, his shyness and uncertainty coming back as he looked at her. "Good thing we were safe last night," he tried to joke, though it fell flat on his lips.
She gazed at him intently, completely unsure about what they were supposed to do now. "Yeah," she murmured, biting her lower lip.
The chasm between them yawned wider, and Sam had never felt more separated from anyone in his life. "Well," he stated, voice strange and awkward.
She looked down at the floor, swallowing hard. "I guess...you'll...go back to your life now." Her voice was barely audible.
He didn't want to, he realized. As much as his brother needed him now, as many problems they were facing with the Feds, other hunters... the Demon... Sam still wanted a normal life. With her. "I... guess so," he muttered, looking down at the floor, his heart sinking to his feet.
Tears prickled at her eyes and she didn't look up at him, though she was trembling visibly. She wanted him to stay. Or to take her with him. Anything to get out of this place that she seemed trapped in right now. She wanted to ask him to keep her safe.
Sam thought he heard a sob escape her lips and glanced up at her. Chloe looked on the verge of collapse, or so he told himself when he closed the distance between them and held her tightly in his arms. "Chloe," he whispered, kissing the top of her head, mentally begging her to say something. Anything. Did she still want him? Was there nothing he could do?
"I'm in trouble, Sam," she whispered back, a tear streaking down her face. "A lot of it."
"What kind of trouble?" He pulled back and looked down at her, eyes filled with concern. His thumb brushed over her wound, causing her to moan in pain a little. "Does it have something to do with this?"
"Yes." She closed her eyes, her face growing pale.
Frowning, he looked around the apartment a moment. "Look, I want to hear about this, but we have two options: you can come with me, or I can stay here. Either way, I'm not leaving you." He stared intently at her. "Which do you want, Chloe?"
It only took her a moment to decide. "I need an hour to pack and talk my cousin and Clark."
A wide smile crossed his face. She wanted to come with him, Sam thought, leaning down and kissing her quickly. "Okay, I'll call Dean and let him know you'll be crashing with us for awhile... that is, if he's conscious right now."
Nodding, she slowly headed toward her bedroom, wondering what she'd just gotten herself into.