Roswell Series: Before I Knew You: Fic 10, Out of the Shadows (1/1)
Author: X_tremeroswellian
Email: faithboscorelli1@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: Not mine. Don't sue. The song "Out of the Shadows" is also not mine. It belongs to the wonderful, talented Sarah McLachlan and appears on her album, "Touch."
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: Only for the first four stories of this "Before I Knew You" series.
Author's Note: Might want to read, "Building a Mystery," "Posession," "Elsewhere," and "Good Enough" before reading this story.
Summary: What was going on with Max and Liz the month before the shooting?
"Rising up
The night is done
And now the bright lights come
Held back in my pitied world
Where everything's undone
A cold wind blows right through me
I'm made a hollow shell
There's nothing left, just ash remains
Enrich the soil, no soul, no soul
Close call there in the shadows
There's an end to the dark
Cause there's someone out there
Someone like me..."
--Sarah McLachlan, "Out of the Shadows"
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Out of the Shadows
"I don't like this." Isabel stood in the doorway of Max's bedroom, watching as he packed a duffel bag.
"I can't help it. It's required for the class."
"Are you going to be okay with this, Maxwell? I mean, you and Liz alone, outside under the stars for the whole night?" Michael asked doubtfully.
"We're hardly going to be alone. Our entire biology class is going." He glanced over at Isabel and noticed the worried expression on her face. "It's going to be okay, Is. Nothing's going to happen."
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"Maria, it's not a problem. Our whole class is going." Liz tossed an extra blanket into her duffel bag and turned to face her friend. "Besides, Max doesn't feel that way about me and *I'm* going out with Kyle."
"Right." Maria watched her pack.
"Okay. Well, I've got a bus to catch. Would you mind giving me a ride?"
"Sure. Let's go."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Max climbed onto the bus, and drew in a deep breath. He greeted Ms. Hardy and then walked further back.
Liz looked up and smiled at him. "Hey, Max."
Max gazed at her and then smiled back. "Hey."
"Do you want to sit with me?" she offered, moving her bag onto her lap.
He swallowed hard. "Okay." Max dropped down into the seat next to her and hauled his bag on top of his lap as well.
Liz felt a tingle throughout her as their arms brushed casually. Just keep reminding yourself that you're going out with Kyle and you'll be just fine, she told herself. She glanced over at Max, who stared straight ahead of him. Then she looked out the window.
"We have about a three hour drive ahead of us," Ms. Hardy announced as the last student climbed onto the bus and took his seat. "We'll sleep out under the stars tonight, and in your lab groups you'll discuss the various constellations."
Liz leaned her head against the window as the bus started up and the driver pulled away from the school. She watched as the scenery rushed by her. Then she closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep moments later.
Max glanced over and a smile formed on his lips as he watched her sleeping. He listened to the gentle sound of her breathing, and leaned towards her until he could feel the warm breath leaving her lips. It smelled sweet, like cinnamon. He watched as a strand of her hair fell across her face and he ever so gently brushed it back into place. She moved slightly, and Max's heart began to race as her head laid against his shoulder. Then he calmed down when he realized she was still asleep.
He took the opportunity to watch her, unnoticed. She was so peaceful, so content. He wondered if she was dreaming.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Honey bear, I missed you!"
"Grandma Claudia! It's been so long since I've seen you!" Liz cried, throwing her arms around her neck. She kissed her grandmother on the cheek.
"You look beautiful!" her granmother exclaimed.
Liz smiled. "Thank you." She looked around. They were standing on the beach, staring out across the ocean.
"He's the one, Lizzie," Grandma Claudia said softly.
Liz blinked in surprise. "What?"
"The answer to your question. The one you haven't asked yet. He's the one."
She bit her lip. She had no idea what she was talking about.
"You'll know. In time. When you're ready. When you're both ready."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Liz awoke slowly, unsure of her surroundings. She felt like she was moving, but she was sitting down. She blinked and opened her eyes, yawning. Her head was resting against something very comfortable. Suddenly she realized she was on the bus on the way to her biology camp out and that the something she was resting her head on was actually someone.
She jerked her head up and gasped.
"Are you okay? Did you have a bad dream?" Max asked, looking down at her in concern.
Liz shook her head. "Uh, no. I just--I'm sorry. I didn't mean to use you as a human pillow."
Max bit back the grin he felt at her words, and shook his head. "It's okay." In reality, he felt a bit disappointed that she had woken up and pulled away so quickly.
She stretched and looked out the window. "How long have I been asleep?"
Max looked at his watch. "I dunno. About two hours, I think."
Liz cringed. "I am so sorry, Max."
"Hey, don't worry about it. It's really not a big deal," he added shyly, looking down at his feet.
She bit her lip and stared at her own feet.
"All right, class, we're here," Ms. Hardy announced a half hour later. Liz and Max both looked out the window.
"We're in the middle of nowhere," she murmured.
Max gazed down at her. "Well, at least it will be a good view of the stars."
She looked up at him. "Yeah." They were so close, Liz could feel his warm breath mingling with her own. If she moved even an inch, their lips would meet. She swallowed hard, her eyes wide.
Max stared down at her looking up at him. He felt his pulse quicken as he realized how close they were to one another. He unconsciously let his gaze drop to her lips.
"And what do we have here?" Pam Troy demanded, glaring at them. "We're here for star-gazing, not making out."
Max and Liz both looked up at her. "We weren't doing anything," Max said quickly. "Right?"
Her thoughts were racing, but she managed to get out, "Right." Had Max been about to kiss me? she wondered. She closed her eyes briefly and took a deep breath. "Let's get off the bus," she said quickly. She didn't even give Max a chance to get up. She squeezed past him and hurried down the bus steps, eager to get some fresh air.
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Max found himself watching her as he set up his sleeping bag and pulled out a bag of nacho chips and a bottle of tabasco sauce. She was moving quickly to set up her own sleeping bag, and busying herself with making sure that everything was in perfect order before their star-gazing session began.
She's nervous, he realized. Because of me. Because of what almost happened. He swallowed hard and pried his eyes away from her delicate face. He ripped open the bag of chips and poured tabasco sauce onto some, crunching away. Had she wanted him to kiss her? She certainly hadn't moved away until Pam interupted them. Was it possible that Liz had wanted to kiss him as badly as he had wanted to kiss her?
No. Not possible. This was Liz Parker. She was popular, pretty, smart. And he wasn't even human.
Of course she didn't know that.
That urge to tell her suddenly swept over him again. He gazed over at her as she settled down on her sleeping bag, just feet away from him. "Liz."
She looked at him. "Yeah?"
"Can I ask you something?"
"Sure." She got up, and dragged her sleeping bag a little closer so they could talk quietly without people eavesdropping as easily. Then she sat back down and waited.
"What if...someone you'd known for a really long time told you this huge secret that this person hadn't told anyone else?"
Her eyebrows furrowed. "I'm not sure I know what you mean."
"I mean, say this secret was like, really huge. Something that could change everything--the way you saw the person. What would you do if you found out that someone you thought you knew was really completely different than who you thought they were?"
"Well, I'm still not quite following you, Max," she said slowly.
He gazed up at the sky that was filling with beautiful stars. "Say that--Alex told you he was gay. What would you do?"
"You mean, would I stop being his friend?" she asked.
"Yeah." He continued staring up at the sky.
"No, of course not. I mean, Alex has been my friend for a really long time. And it wouldn't change the way I feel about him. Hypothetically speaking, if he told me he was gay, then he would have been gay all along, so it doesn't change anything. He just didn't tell me. Something like that is really personal and it takes a long time to build up a trust that's strong enough to share that secret with someone."
Max's heart nearly stopped. He looked over at her. "Right."
"Why?" she asked softly.
"A friend asked me how to deal with something and I wasn't really sure what to say."
"Well, I hope I helped." She gazed up at the sky.
"You did. More than you can know," he said quietly.
"The stars are really beautiful tonight," she said.
He gazed at her. "Yeah."
"There's the big dipper," she said, pointing it out to him. She pointed out a few others and he looked at her with amazement.
"You know a lot about this stuff, don't you?" he asked.
She smiled. "Yeah, well. When I was younger, my parents were always busy with the Crashdown and everything and then my dad got me a telescope for my ninth birthday so I would have something to do when they worked at night. I used to spend hours on my rooftop star-gazing. Made me feel less alone. Like I was connected with the universe somehow." Liz shook her head. "Stupid, huh?"
"No, it's not stupid at all. Actually, I think I know how you feel," he admitted, watching the sky.
Liz looked over at him and then back up.
"Do you ever wonder if there's something else out there?" he ventured carefully.
"Like--?"
"I don't know. Aliens or something."
She blinked. "Well, actually, yeah, I've wondered that a lot."
"Do you believe that there are?"
Liz laid down on her sleeping bag so she could get a better view of the night sky. "Well, not one hundred percent. But I think it's pretty arrogant to say that with all that beautiful space--" she began, motioning her hand to the sky. "--that we're the only beings in existence."
"But doesn't the whole idea scare you?"
She propped herself up on her elbows and gazed over at him. "No. Why would it?"
Max met her gaze. "Well, I mean with all the movies and books...most people are frightened by the idea."
"Yeah, well, it's Hollywood. Hollywood is all about special effects and blowing things way out of proportion to make money." She dropped back down on her sleeping bag and returned her eyes to the sky. "In reality, if there are other beings out there somewhere, it's more concievable, to me at least, that they would be just as human as you and I."
"So you think the aliens would be nice and not little green men who abduct people while they're sleeping and perform experiments on them?" He couldn't believe he actually just said that, and to Liz Parker of all people.
She laughed. "Yeah, I'm sure they'd want to come down here just to abduct us and study us when they're probably like, a zillion times more intelligent than we are to begin with."
Max stared at her in shock. "Is that what you really think?"
She sat up again and looked at him. "Well, you did ask me my opinion," she said, a bit defensively.
"Yeah, I did. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to sound patronizing." Max gazed at her. "It's just--I think you're the only person I've met who isn't terrified of the whole idea."
Liz smiled. "The idea of aliens doesn't scare me. Now bigfoot on the other hand..."
Max laughed. "Right." He looked back up at the sky. He realized he knew already that he was going to tell Liz the truth eventually. He had known it all along, since the first time he saw her. Now it was all just a matter of time.
Email: faithboscorelli1@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: Not mine. Don't sue. The song "Out of the Shadows" is also not mine. It belongs to the wonderful, talented Sarah McLachlan and appears on her album, "Touch."
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: Only for the first four stories of this "Before I Knew You" series.
Author's Note: Might want to read, "Building a Mystery," "Posession," "Elsewhere," and "Good Enough" before reading this story.
Summary: What was going on with Max and Liz the month before the shooting?
"Rising up
The night is done
And now the bright lights come
Held back in my pitied world
Where everything's undone
A cold wind blows right through me
I'm made a hollow shell
There's nothing left, just ash remains
Enrich the soil, no soul, no soul
Close call there in the shadows
There's an end to the dark
Cause there's someone out there
Someone like me..."
--Sarah McLachlan, "Out of the Shadows"
---------------------------------------
Out of the Shadows
"I don't like this." Isabel stood in the doorway of Max's bedroom, watching as he packed a duffel bag.
"I can't help it. It's required for the class."
"Are you going to be okay with this, Maxwell? I mean, you and Liz alone, outside under the stars for the whole night?" Michael asked doubtfully.
"We're hardly going to be alone. Our entire biology class is going." He glanced over at Isabel and noticed the worried expression on her face. "It's going to be okay, Is. Nothing's going to happen."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Maria, it's not a problem. Our whole class is going." Liz tossed an extra blanket into her duffel bag and turned to face her friend. "Besides, Max doesn't feel that way about me and *I'm* going out with Kyle."
"Right." Maria watched her pack.
"Okay. Well, I've got a bus to catch. Would you mind giving me a ride?"
"Sure. Let's go."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Max climbed onto the bus, and drew in a deep breath. He greeted Ms. Hardy and then walked further back.
Liz looked up and smiled at him. "Hey, Max."
Max gazed at her and then smiled back. "Hey."
"Do you want to sit with me?" she offered, moving her bag onto her lap.
He swallowed hard. "Okay." Max dropped down into the seat next to her and hauled his bag on top of his lap as well.
Liz felt a tingle throughout her as their arms brushed casually. Just keep reminding yourself that you're going out with Kyle and you'll be just fine, she told herself. She glanced over at Max, who stared straight ahead of him. Then she looked out the window.
"We have about a three hour drive ahead of us," Ms. Hardy announced as the last student climbed onto the bus and took his seat. "We'll sleep out under the stars tonight, and in your lab groups you'll discuss the various constellations."
Liz leaned her head against the window as the bus started up and the driver pulled away from the school. She watched as the scenery rushed by her. Then she closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep moments later.
Max glanced over and a smile formed on his lips as he watched her sleeping. He listened to the gentle sound of her breathing, and leaned towards her until he could feel the warm breath leaving her lips. It smelled sweet, like cinnamon. He watched as a strand of her hair fell across her face and he ever so gently brushed it back into place. She moved slightly, and Max's heart began to race as her head laid against his shoulder. Then he calmed down when he realized she was still asleep.
He took the opportunity to watch her, unnoticed. She was so peaceful, so content. He wondered if she was dreaming.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Honey bear, I missed you!"
"Grandma Claudia! It's been so long since I've seen you!" Liz cried, throwing her arms around her neck. She kissed her grandmother on the cheek.
"You look beautiful!" her granmother exclaimed.
Liz smiled. "Thank you." She looked around. They were standing on the beach, staring out across the ocean.
"He's the one, Lizzie," Grandma Claudia said softly.
Liz blinked in surprise. "What?"
"The answer to your question. The one you haven't asked yet. He's the one."
She bit her lip. She had no idea what she was talking about.
"You'll know. In time. When you're ready. When you're both ready."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Liz awoke slowly, unsure of her surroundings. She felt like she was moving, but she was sitting down. She blinked and opened her eyes, yawning. Her head was resting against something very comfortable. Suddenly she realized she was on the bus on the way to her biology camp out and that the something she was resting her head on was actually someone.
She jerked her head up and gasped.
"Are you okay? Did you have a bad dream?" Max asked, looking down at her in concern.
Liz shook her head. "Uh, no. I just--I'm sorry. I didn't mean to use you as a human pillow."
Max bit back the grin he felt at her words, and shook his head. "It's okay." In reality, he felt a bit disappointed that she had woken up and pulled away so quickly.
She stretched and looked out the window. "How long have I been asleep?"
Max looked at his watch. "I dunno. About two hours, I think."
Liz cringed. "I am so sorry, Max."
"Hey, don't worry about it. It's really not a big deal," he added shyly, looking down at his feet.
She bit her lip and stared at her own feet.
"All right, class, we're here," Ms. Hardy announced a half hour later. Liz and Max both looked out the window.
"We're in the middle of nowhere," she murmured.
Max gazed down at her. "Well, at least it will be a good view of the stars."
She looked up at him. "Yeah." They were so close, Liz could feel his warm breath mingling with her own. If she moved even an inch, their lips would meet. She swallowed hard, her eyes wide.
Max stared down at her looking up at him. He felt his pulse quicken as he realized how close they were to one another. He unconsciously let his gaze drop to her lips.
"And what do we have here?" Pam Troy demanded, glaring at them. "We're here for star-gazing, not making out."
Max and Liz both looked up at her. "We weren't doing anything," Max said quickly. "Right?"
Her thoughts were racing, but she managed to get out, "Right." Had Max been about to kiss me? she wondered. She closed her eyes briefly and took a deep breath. "Let's get off the bus," she said quickly. She didn't even give Max a chance to get up. She squeezed past him and hurried down the bus steps, eager to get some fresh air.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Max found himself watching her as he set up his sleeping bag and pulled out a bag of nacho chips and a bottle of tabasco sauce. She was moving quickly to set up her own sleeping bag, and busying herself with making sure that everything was in perfect order before their star-gazing session began.
She's nervous, he realized. Because of me. Because of what almost happened. He swallowed hard and pried his eyes away from her delicate face. He ripped open the bag of chips and poured tabasco sauce onto some, crunching away. Had she wanted him to kiss her? She certainly hadn't moved away until Pam interupted them. Was it possible that Liz had wanted to kiss him as badly as he had wanted to kiss her?
No. Not possible. This was Liz Parker. She was popular, pretty, smart. And he wasn't even human.
Of course she didn't know that.
That urge to tell her suddenly swept over him again. He gazed over at her as she settled down on her sleeping bag, just feet away from him. "Liz."
She looked at him. "Yeah?"
"Can I ask you something?"
"Sure." She got up, and dragged her sleeping bag a little closer so they could talk quietly without people eavesdropping as easily. Then she sat back down and waited.
"What if...someone you'd known for a really long time told you this huge secret that this person hadn't told anyone else?"
Her eyebrows furrowed. "I'm not sure I know what you mean."
"I mean, say this secret was like, really huge. Something that could change everything--the way you saw the person. What would you do if you found out that someone you thought you knew was really completely different than who you thought they were?"
"Well, I'm still not quite following you, Max," she said slowly.
He gazed up at the sky that was filling with beautiful stars. "Say that--Alex told you he was gay. What would you do?"
"You mean, would I stop being his friend?" she asked.
"Yeah." He continued staring up at the sky.
"No, of course not. I mean, Alex has been my friend for a really long time. And it wouldn't change the way I feel about him. Hypothetically speaking, if he told me he was gay, then he would have been gay all along, so it doesn't change anything. He just didn't tell me. Something like that is really personal and it takes a long time to build up a trust that's strong enough to share that secret with someone."
Max's heart nearly stopped. He looked over at her. "Right."
"Why?" she asked softly.
"A friend asked me how to deal with something and I wasn't really sure what to say."
"Well, I hope I helped." She gazed up at the sky.
"You did. More than you can know," he said quietly.
"The stars are really beautiful tonight," she said.
He gazed at her. "Yeah."
"There's the big dipper," she said, pointing it out to him. She pointed out a few others and he looked at her with amazement.
"You know a lot about this stuff, don't you?" he asked.
She smiled. "Yeah, well. When I was younger, my parents were always busy with the Crashdown and everything and then my dad got me a telescope for my ninth birthday so I would have something to do when they worked at night. I used to spend hours on my rooftop star-gazing. Made me feel less alone. Like I was connected with the universe somehow." Liz shook her head. "Stupid, huh?"
"No, it's not stupid at all. Actually, I think I know how you feel," he admitted, watching the sky.
Liz looked over at him and then back up.
"Do you ever wonder if there's something else out there?" he ventured carefully.
"Like--?"
"I don't know. Aliens or something."
She blinked. "Well, actually, yeah, I've wondered that a lot."
"Do you believe that there are?"
Liz laid down on her sleeping bag so she could get a better view of the night sky. "Well, not one hundred percent. But I think it's pretty arrogant to say that with all that beautiful space--" she began, motioning her hand to the sky. "--that we're the only beings in existence."
"But doesn't the whole idea scare you?"
She propped herself up on her elbows and gazed over at him. "No. Why would it?"
Max met her gaze. "Well, I mean with all the movies and books...most people are frightened by the idea."
"Yeah, well, it's Hollywood. Hollywood is all about special effects and blowing things way out of proportion to make money." She dropped back down on her sleeping bag and returned her eyes to the sky. "In reality, if there are other beings out there somewhere, it's more concievable, to me at least, that they would be just as human as you and I."
"So you think the aliens would be nice and not little green men who abduct people while they're sleeping and perform experiments on them?" He couldn't believe he actually just said that, and to Liz Parker of all people.
She laughed. "Yeah, I'm sure they'd want to come down here just to abduct us and study us when they're probably like, a zillion times more intelligent than we are to begin with."
Max stared at her in shock. "Is that what you really think?"
She sat up again and looked at him. "Well, you did ask me my opinion," she said, a bit defensively.
"Yeah, I did. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to sound patronizing." Max gazed at her. "It's just--I think you're the only person I've met who isn't terrified of the whole idea."
Liz smiled. "The idea of aliens doesn't scare me. Now bigfoot on the other hand..."
Max laughed. "Right." He looked back up at the sky. He realized he knew already that he was going to tell Liz the truth eventually. He had known it all along, since the first time he saw her. Now it was all just a matter of time.