Updating from library again....
Sometimes I'm not really sure what going on
Sometimes I feel like my whole life's a con
Sometimes I wonder why I'm here
Sometimes I think, when there's no one near
Think that there is something wrong with me
Think that you should let me be
Think that I should be alone
Think that I deserve no one
Everything is changing around me
Everything, you can see
Everything is the same in one way
Everthing come what may
Maybe I was wrong about me
Maybe I'm someone else
Maybe I just wish I could be someone
Maybe the someone you love
Ok I was really bored... sorry about the lame poem... I was a little depressed but I'm feeling a lot better now. Something about expressing stuff in a poem, it always helps me to see my own emotions. I guess I was just sad because I can feel myself changing, and I don't like it. I'm afraid. I don't want to change into someone that Matt doesn't love. Yeah I know. It sounds lame, but I really am scared of it. I don't even know why I'm changing. Maybe it's not real, maybe it's my own imagination. I don't know.
But really, everyone is changing. I can feel it. Sometimes even see it. I hung out with Matt last night and he was different, not a bad different, just not the same. Nicole and Dave are different too, but I think that is mostly from experiences they have had. Nicole is kinda-punkish I guess, and Dave I really don't know how to describe. It's kind of like he's protecting himself, but still doing the things that he used to. Just not as open as before.
I don't know what's going on, but I don't want to change too much. A little more responsibility would probably help, I'm so bad at that stuff. I don't know whether to put my foot down and say "that's it! I refuse to change!" But would that even really help? I mean everyone says that you can't stop change.
Okay I'm going to stop worrying now. I'm just gonna take life as it comes and make the best out of it. I don't care how Matt changes. I'll still love him no matter what.
<3...I love you Matt...<3