Marriage to athlete no bed of roses
Love tested by hectic, short-term career and, often, relocation
Published: Tuesday, February 14, 2006
On Valentine's Day, single Canadian women fantasize about the man of their dreams. But it isn't a knight in shining armour on a white horse they imagine whisking them away.
It's a sweaty man in a jersey, helmet and skates.
Granted, not every Canuck chick is into hockey players, but most of us have wondered at least once what it would be like to wear a big rock from a hockey star on our left hand.
Unfortunately, if you fantasize that life with a pro sports star is filled with fancy parties, sparkling jewelry and pampering at the spa, then a fantasy is exactly what it is. It's not reality.
Kelly Turco, wife of Team Canada and Dallas Stars goalie Marty Turco, says her plans for Valentine's Day aren't exactly the stuff romance movies are made of.
"The whole family [including two young girls] arrives in Turin that day, and then the team has practice that evening. We'll have to celebrate another day -- like a movie and dinner at home some time," Kelly Turco said.
The Turcos didn't even plan anything special for the first annual Pro Sports Wives Day on Saturday.
This national day of observance has been officially awarded in the U.S. to the Professional Sports Wives Association, a non-profit organization launched last September to provide pro sports wives with resources and support on topics that range from marriage counselling to financial planning.
PSWA member Diana McNab, a psychologist who's divorced from former Canuck Peter McNab, says the often-ignored better halves endure unique challenges throughout the year: Juggling the demands of a husband's hectic and short-term career, watching female fans hitting on their men, relocating at a moment's notice, managing income that could evaporate after a career-ending injury, and putting their own careers on the backburner -- all under the watchful public eye.
The PSWA says statistics prove it isn't easy. The group claims a staggering 80 per cent of pro athletes are divorced and are $250,000 US in debt after they have retired.
These wives say they're not trying to drum up sympathy.
"[The PSWA] is just a great way to keep everyone in touch and it introduces women with similar lifestyles to one another so that they don't feel alone," says Turco.
The PSWA believes strong, independent women are more likely to survive athlete marriages, because their husbands' schedules force them to operate like single parents during the season.
So, if you're a single woman who matches the description, and you don't mind swatting groupies off your guy who's around less than Snuffleupagus, making friends fast but not for long, and scraping pennies together after an injury, then the hockey player is your man.
If not, you'd better go back to that fantasy about the guy in the tin suit on the horse. jenzurowski@shaw.ca
© The Vancouver Province 2006