(no subject)
hmm...Well I had this whole plan about how to talk to Dan about how I feel...but it definetly did not work out like I wanted it to...actually our "talk" never happened at all. As soon as I got to his house, he gave me this necklace that he spent his entire paycheck on. Then I was talking to his mom, who seems really cool, but what she was saying kind of scared me...ok nvm it scared me a lot. She said that she told Danny that the next thing he'd be getting me was a ring...not an engagement ring, but a promise ring. (um..is there a difference when you're 15?) oh man oh man. Oh! And THEN his sister sat down and had a talk with me (which I didn't mind cuz I like her too..its just what they were saying!) She said that she's told the few girls that Dan has been serious about, that she'll kick their ass if they break his heart. And she didn't say it flat out (she said she didn't because she liked me) but she begged me not to hurt him. And I'm honestly not planning on it, I just am so scared now that what I have to tell him will hurt him anyways. This past weekend was just way too overwhelming. I felt practically blackmailed!! And last night he called me but i had my ringer off, and this morning I got his message saying that he missed me and he felt really bad and he really needed to talk to me...GOD I FEEL SO BAD. We don't talk much during the week because he goes to work every night an hour after I get out of school and doesn't come home till 10 or sometimes 11 cuz now he cooks so they like always need him. I know I've said this before..but its true. I mean I really like Dan, and we get along so well since we've been friends for so long..and I feel a lot more comfortable around him then I do a lot of other guys...but that's just the thing..i want to keep it that way with him. I don't want something to happen and for me to totally lose him. And it's all way too much too fast..and the last time that happened....well I don't really want to talk about it.
Ok. I'm sick of moping about that. I'm sorry if it pains you to read it. I really want to get together with a lot of ppl this weekend, but Friday we are going to Tampa for Nationals...(which i'm really nervous about) considering I just learned the dance and that a lot of ppl haven't shown up to practice the last couple of weeks before the (supposively) biggest competition of the year. So I just hope it goes well and that I come back alive.
Overall tho, I've felt alittle better lately..emotionally that is. Maybe all that medicine is finally kicking in. But this isn't including how I feel physically, because I'm still sick and it's hard for me to make it thru the day. I'm thankful for the first part tho... <3
Ok. I'm sick of moping about that. I'm sorry if it pains you to read it. I really want to get together with a lot of ppl this weekend, but Friday we are going to Tampa for Nationals...(which i'm really nervous about) considering I just learned the dance and that a lot of ppl haven't shown up to practice the last couple of weeks before the (supposively) biggest competition of the year. So I just hope it goes well and that I come back alive.
Overall tho, I've felt alittle better lately..emotionally that is. Maybe all that medicine is finally kicking in. But this isn't including how I feel physically, because I'm still sick and it's hard for me to make it thru the day. I'm thankful for the first part tho... <3