(no subject)
Today Anna and I hung out. I hadn't seen her in a long time. We use to be best friends. We use to have fun together and be able to talk for hours and if we didn't have anything to say we would watch movies. I would stay at her house every weekend, it was nice having a best friend. We both homeschooled at the time. Then she started going to a christian school and we started hanging out less and less till eventually we just stopped. She had new friends. I didn't matter anymore. Today I have realized just how much we have both changed. We had such a hard time thinking of things of say. I would like to keep in touch with her, make sure she's ok, but today was just really awkward.(sp?) and if it's like that everytime we hang out, i'm not sure how often I want to hang out. We have nothing in common. We don't listen to the same music,wear the same clothes,talk about the same things, we don't have fun the same way. We're just so different now.
It has me all sad and depressed. I want to be friends like we were, I want to be able to re-wind the clock, I would change so many things. I have good friends, don't get me wrong. I want a best friend though. Someone my age. All my good friends are either older or younger. I have nobody my age. I want someone my age that I can talk to about anything...from boys, to my dirty little secret, to pink snakes with fur! That use to be Anna. I just want a friendship like Anna and I had again, even if it isn't with her..I just want it with someone. Everyone wants that though, everyone always talks about how that is what they want. It seems that nobody has it. Does it actually exist? Maybe i'm sugarcoating the relationship I had with Anna, maybe it wasn't really as good as I thought. gah, who knows. I'm just down right now. I've been thinking about alot of stuff and today just didn't help.
I apologize for all that, just wanted to get it out.
Here comes another one!
My cousin Andra(she's all married and such) is in town and asked my Nanny to cook a fried chicken dinner for her while she's here, Nanny says "ok..Wednesday at 12" Andra said "ok! that's great Nanny thanks!"
THEN Andra goes off and schedules an appt. to get her hair permed...at 12:30 Wednesday. This whole fricken dinner was for her, and she may not even be there. She's always like that, she's always flaked out and just done stupid things but when she's around it's like she's a queen, the world revolves around her.
I'm done.
*thinks about whether there is anything else she wants to say*
hmm...i'm getting these nifty hairthings off hottopic. i'll post a link soon.
I may order a FSF shirt too. Not sure. Not a big Hottopic fan but sometimes they have something cool.
GAH! THEY MAY BE COMING SOON! *crosses fingers and prays*
-teddi