(no subject)
Y'know. When me and sam first got together. he told me, that he knew for a fact that i had the balls to blow my head off. and he knew i'd do it if i was pushed to far. y'know, that was true... and then i got soft, and i wasnt able to do it... i just popped pills and shot up on heroin (which im thinkin about doin again) sam seemed to like me more when i was on it... anyway. So, now im wondering... do i have the courage.... maybe hang myself... or somethin.. he wont miss me...he'll never miss me... he doesnt want me, he doesnt love me. hell he has his friends lie to me, for him. so he gets out of talking to me. i'll just, leave this world and he'll never notice me being gone... so... he says that "no matter what i'll always stand beside you, because im your friend. im the one person that will always be side you and not behind you goin 'oh its okay im back here' like everyone else has done to you..." then what is he doin now? totally ignoring me... not wanting anything to do with me... blowing me off.. its all not worth it anymore... i'm done.... if this doesnt work i dont know what will....maybe he'll get the balls to answer the phone sometime today... a true friend is there when you needthem most, and he's never there for me... the only time he ever answers the phone is when he thinks its someone else, or he doesnt recognize the number.... -sighs- im goin to town.... bye..