(no subject)
Everything seriously sucks hardcore right now. Friendships are falling apart. Realtionships are falling apart. Everything that used to be good is falling apart. All I want to say right now is FUCK YOU to the world.
I hate my parents so much. It's funny though because I try to do what I can to get my dad to atleast somewhat like me. Acknowledge my existence. I was six when I told him to leave me alone and he responded with "if I could I would leave you on the side of the highway and never come back for you." Everytime after that when we'd be driving somewhere together, silence, I just wanted to open the door and jump out in to traffic. He thinks I'm worthless, stupid and inconsiderate. He makes me feel so small and defenseless. Always calling me names and putting me down. My self esteem level is fukking in the negetive numbers now. I HATE HIM. But I just wish I made him happy and he would accept me and like me. Then my mom is freaking out at me. Yes mom I like girls. Yes mom my girlfriend makes me very happy. You think if she really gave a shit, she'd be happy that I am happy instead of criticizing me and giving me shit about it. Arg I wish they'd just go away.
Krystal: I'm also really glad that we are so close. I know I can talk to you about anything. We've had 6 years of good time. Sure we had our rough times, but we got over it. We've been through a lot together and I love you to death. You really are my best friend and I wouldn't trade what we've built for the world.
Hmmmmm Sno Ball is comming up. Should be fun. I'm looking forward to it. I guess we are all going to Krystal's home before. I wonder if her mom will be lecturing me about dating a girl. Well, that is if she doesn't get to me before then.
God I wish people would just get off my back and shut the fuk up. This is me, if you don't like it, that's your problem. I don't need your stupid ass comments to cut me down.
Sometimes I wonder how much more of this I can take before I give up. I've had enough already and chances are things will only get worse. When am I going to be HAPPY? I can't even remember the last time I made it through a WHOLE DAY without crying atleast once....
God I'm pathetic. It makes me sick.
I hate my parents so much. It's funny though because I try to do what I can to get my dad to atleast somewhat like me. Acknowledge my existence. I was six when I told him to leave me alone and he responded with "if I could I would leave you on the side of the highway and never come back for you." Everytime after that when we'd be driving somewhere together, silence, I just wanted to open the door and jump out in to traffic. He thinks I'm worthless, stupid and inconsiderate. He makes me feel so small and defenseless. Always calling me names and putting me down. My self esteem level is fukking in the negetive numbers now. I HATE HIM. But I just wish I made him happy and he would accept me and like me. Then my mom is freaking out at me. Yes mom I like girls. Yes mom my girlfriend makes me very happy. You think if she really gave a shit, she'd be happy that I am happy instead of criticizing me and giving me shit about it. Arg I wish they'd just go away.
Krystal: I'm also really glad that we are so close. I know I can talk to you about anything. We've had 6 years of good time. Sure we had our rough times, but we got over it. We've been through a lot together and I love you to death. You really are my best friend and I wouldn't trade what we've built for the world.
Hmmmmm Sno Ball is comming up. Should be fun. I'm looking forward to it. I guess we are all going to Krystal's home before. I wonder if her mom will be lecturing me about dating a girl. Well, that is if she doesn't get to me before then.
God I wish people would just get off my back and shut the fuk up. This is me, if you don't like it, that's your problem. I don't need your stupid ass comments to cut me down.
Sometimes I wonder how much more of this I can take before I give up. I've had enough already and chances are things will only get worse. When am I going to be HAPPY? I can't even remember the last time I made it through a WHOLE DAY without crying atleast once....
God I'm pathetic. It makes me sick.