2 out of 4 lightbulbs in my room are out...so its rather dim
heres another update...just because
thursday: dance....had a nice long break to help around the studio, call people, eat junk food dinners and think. i called 4 people and thought alot. i had a pespi bottle which heather found me crushing to death with my hands. im just really stressed and comfused, but at least i can dance i out, and it feels good. lyrical team kicked ass as usual, i love my la danse family!
yesterday: school. well, ive had enough of school, and enough of what people have to say. bombed a geometry test. dave visited my study hall and i went over to talk to him for the last 15 minutes. got out of 6th period study hall with liz to find a pieve for forensics, so we did nothing but talk in luciano's office. i love my liz and miss her to death! i never get to talkto her liek i used to. well anyway, i missed the bus, so i had to wait for a ride home. came home and danced around. got my parents to let me go to jacqui's, i was supposed to sleep over but my moms stupid. went over there and had a kickass time. we watched movies and ate and talked. i really have to hang out with her more often. then i came home and talked online. talked on the phone for a little while and then layed in bed and thought for a long long time. ive been thinking to much latly.
today: got up and got dressed. went to the mall with mom because i needed stuff. got a lecture int he ,mall about hard work, but it wasnt bad. it was good to actually spend time with her and geet along for the most part. i got a dress for victoria's sweet 16, its pretty, yay! then got a shirt and christmas presents for my twin cousins. got dead sea facial products with my mom, she decided it was a good way for us to talk for a while every week, while doing our faces! shes an insane woman who does the unspeakable sometimes, but it really felt good to know that shes trying, and she proved that today. we ate lunch and my mom started bugging me about what i wanted to do with my life. niether of my paretns know what i plan to do so they cant use it against me. i told my mom shed see when she needed to, but she still bugged me anyway. i came home and found that my dad already found my report card because it was open under a stack of papers, so i took it. later he came into my room and the conversation went as follows
my father: hey angel we need to talk
me: daddy i already found it
my father: you took it!??! god your smart, and crafty, athough your report card tells me otherwise. im glad i was home first.
me: ok?
my father: you have to tell your mother between today and tomorrow and i want no noise and no whining. you know your screwed, and im not helping you. when you tell your mother, get ready for the biggest beating and hell raising of your life.
yea, so im scared itll ruin what my mom was trying to start to fix. and im glad i never told my paretns what im doing with my life, because theyd audimatically use it against me and crush my hopes and dreams. and no one does that to me, and i mean no one. they are something i can hold onto. i know you cant live in a dreamers world all of your life, but i do know someone who doesnt dream is an empty someone.
i also saw this on liz's livejournal a while ago,a nd its about time i did it
for 10 people who dont know....
1. best friend, all i can discribe you as. known you forever, glad we got closer everyday. to see you suceed is so great and to see you glowing in school everyday is even better. its wonderful that your happy. like a sister to me. i can tell you my every secret, my every thought, and youd never tell a soul. someone i trust more than anyone. your always there and im so happy that i can have a friend like you. they say if you have one great friend in life you are more than blessed, and i consider you to be that person. i love you
2. i miss you. i miss what we had in a friendship. you were one of my best friends all of freshman year and over the summer, and i feel like i blew it. your another one that i trust with so much and i wish that i talked to you more, even though i know itll never be the same. im so grateful that you were there for me anytime i needed you.
3. isnt it funny how we became friends? your there, you listen, you understand. someone whose great to have a "girl talk" with. someone to pick me up when im down. thanks. and i hope we become closer.
4. an older friend whose given me advice on it all. didnt know you until that long ass phone call. now your one of my closest friends who looks out for me like no other. i know your frustrated with my decisions right now, but its getting better and i know im fine. thanks for everything youve ever done for me and are still doing for me.
5. another friend i met in the oddest way. just saw you everywhere and randomly started saying hi. the better version of me. someone i trust and care about like no other. a best friend outside of school, someone i really need. i love you and im so glad to have you in my life.
6. havnt known you for that long and yet your already one of my best coolest friends. havnt seen you outside of school in a while and i miss hanging out with you. you can make me laugh no matter what the circumstance. my mother away from home! thanks for being there to talk to and for advice. thanks for the hot pockets....lol
7. a friend who i dont see much anymore, who lives kind of far, but who i can say i trust with my secrets. your crazy. your very crazy, but you know when to be sirious. you can relate with me on some stuff and can tell me things to do to help situations. so glad i got to see you over the summer for a week at camp. wish i saw you more, i miss you.
8. a best friend and relative. you know everyhting. weve been though alot together. im sorry if im pushing you away, i dont mean to it just happens i guess, i love you so much! i hope your doing good.
9. weve had so many adventures. so many good times, and i friend ive known since i was 6. from grammar school to high school, weve stuck close. someone who i cherish as a friend and someone who has impacted my life. weve been out of state together and your like a sister to me. dont see you much anymore with sceduals and school. im sorry. well get back in touch soon.
10. ok. havnt known you for long at all, yet weve been through alot. your there, all the time. you can make me smile and i care about you alot. know almost everyhting about me, and have helped me through some tough scary stuff. im here for you whenever you need. im so glad your still around and i hope that you stay around, you said you werent leaving. thanks for everyhting
all of you have touched me in one way or another. thankyou so much.
( feel free to comment...especially if your one of the ten i wrote about)
thursday: dance....had a nice long break to help around the studio, call people, eat junk food dinners and think. i called 4 people and thought alot. i had a pespi bottle which heather found me crushing to death with my hands. im just really stressed and comfused, but at least i can dance i out, and it feels good. lyrical team kicked ass as usual, i love my la danse family!
yesterday: school. well, ive had enough of school, and enough of what people have to say. bombed a geometry test. dave visited my study hall and i went over to talk to him for the last 15 minutes. got out of 6th period study hall with liz to find a pieve for forensics, so we did nothing but talk in luciano's office. i love my liz and miss her to death! i never get to talkto her liek i used to. well anyway, i missed the bus, so i had to wait for a ride home. came home and danced around. got my parents to let me go to jacqui's, i was supposed to sleep over but my moms stupid. went over there and had a kickass time. we watched movies and ate and talked. i really have to hang out with her more often. then i came home and talked online. talked on the phone for a little while and then layed in bed and thought for a long long time. ive been thinking to much latly.
today: got up and got dressed. went to the mall with mom because i needed stuff. got a lecture int he ,mall about hard work, but it wasnt bad. it was good to actually spend time with her and geet along for the most part. i got a dress for victoria's sweet 16, its pretty, yay! then got a shirt and christmas presents for my twin cousins. got dead sea facial products with my mom, she decided it was a good way for us to talk for a while every week, while doing our faces! shes an insane woman who does the unspeakable sometimes, but it really felt good to know that shes trying, and she proved that today. we ate lunch and my mom started bugging me about what i wanted to do with my life. niether of my paretns know what i plan to do so they cant use it against me. i told my mom shed see when she needed to, but she still bugged me anyway. i came home and found that my dad already found my report card because it was open under a stack of papers, so i took it. later he came into my room and the conversation went as follows
my father: hey angel we need to talk
me: daddy i already found it
my father: you took it!??! god your smart, and crafty, athough your report card tells me otherwise. im glad i was home first.
me: ok?
my father: you have to tell your mother between today and tomorrow and i want no noise and no whining. you know your screwed, and im not helping you. when you tell your mother, get ready for the biggest beating and hell raising of your life.
yea, so im scared itll ruin what my mom was trying to start to fix. and im glad i never told my paretns what im doing with my life, because theyd audimatically use it against me and crush my hopes and dreams. and no one does that to me, and i mean no one. they are something i can hold onto. i know you cant live in a dreamers world all of your life, but i do know someone who doesnt dream is an empty someone.
i also saw this on liz's livejournal a while ago,a nd its about time i did it
for 10 people who dont know....
1. best friend, all i can discribe you as. known you forever, glad we got closer everyday. to see you suceed is so great and to see you glowing in school everyday is even better. its wonderful that your happy. like a sister to me. i can tell you my every secret, my every thought, and youd never tell a soul. someone i trust more than anyone. your always there and im so happy that i can have a friend like you. they say if you have one great friend in life you are more than blessed, and i consider you to be that person. i love you
2. i miss you. i miss what we had in a friendship. you were one of my best friends all of freshman year and over the summer, and i feel like i blew it. your another one that i trust with so much and i wish that i talked to you more, even though i know itll never be the same. im so grateful that you were there for me anytime i needed you.
3. isnt it funny how we became friends? your there, you listen, you understand. someone whose great to have a "girl talk" with. someone to pick me up when im down. thanks. and i hope we become closer.
4. an older friend whose given me advice on it all. didnt know you until that long ass phone call. now your one of my closest friends who looks out for me like no other. i know your frustrated with my decisions right now, but its getting better and i know im fine. thanks for everything youve ever done for me and are still doing for me.
5. another friend i met in the oddest way. just saw you everywhere and randomly started saying hi. the better version of me. someone i trust and care about like no other. a best friend outside of school, someone i really need. i love you and im so glad to have you in my life.
6. havnt known you for that long and yet your already one of my best coolest friends. havnt seen you outside of school in a while and i miss hanging out with you. you can make me laugh no matter what the circumstance. my mother away from home! thanks for being there to talk to and for advice. thanks for the hot pockets....lol
7. a friend who i dont see much anymore, who lives kind of far, but who i can say i trust with my secrets. your crazy. your very crazy, but you know when to be sirious. you can relate with me on some stuff and can tell me things to do to help situations. so glad i got to see you over the summer for a week at camp. wish i saw you more, i miss you.
8. a best friend and relative. you know everyhting. weve been though alot together. im sorry if im pushing you away, i dont mean to it just happens i guess, i love you so much! i hope your doing good.
9. weve had so many adventures. so many good times, and i friend ive known since i was 6. from grammar school to high school, weve stuck close. someone who i cherish as a friend and someone who has impacted my life. weve been out of state together and your like a sister to me. dont see you much anymore with sceduals and school. im sorry. well get back in touch soon.
10. ok. havnt known you for long at all, yet weve been through alot. your there, all the time. you can make me smile and i care about you alot. know almost everyhting about me, and have helped me through some tough scary stuff. im here for you whenever you need. im so glad your still around and i hope that you stay around, you said you werent leaving. thanks for everyhting
all of you have touched me in one way or another. thankyou so much.
( feel free to comment...especially if your one of the ten i wrote about)