i always sound angry, but im not.

[xsplitendsx]

this doesnt even feel worth it.
this doesnt even feel real.
slit.
bleed.
cry. ache. writhe around on the floor begging for forgivness.
begging for myself to forgive you and you acknowledging my weakness for the few that have deserted my heart. my presence, my being. those who affirmed to so many a time.
those who were part of it. those who felt with me, ached with me, triped with me.
her hand turned black; it ate away at her flesh her bone. it disintegrated, and i reached, caught, squeezed before it devored everything.
relax.
relax, relax, relax.
youre so proud, but this will fuck you up more.
you know who fucks one up more?
you know who, you know what?
FUCKING YOU. FUCKING YOU YOU YOU.
thats what does, thats what is, thats what hurts.
fucking the only person i could relate to, fucking the closest.... those are never as real as the others. those who you dont need everyday, those who exist without you, but still think of you, those are the ones for life.
and this, as much as it hurts, as much as its crashing & burning.
i hope i make it out alive.