HOLY CORNDOGS!!
Please come out to this because it's going to be the best show ever witnessed. If you don't come, I'll send Drowningman out to kidnap your dog, or cat, or any pet that you have.
In fact, you should come just for the sole purpose to slap Alvin on the back because we all now know that he doesn't shoot blanks.
You should also come just to see the pregnant stomach that he helped produce for probably the last time, considering she's due July 10th.
So, in honor of Bill Nye the Science Guy, "Consider the Following:"
If you don't come, you will be sad.
-Brendan