now that you know your end is near
I know my livejournal is in no way political, but I just finished reading the latest issue of Time, and I am really angry and sad.
I used to read the news every single fucking day, all the way through, every single article, and I no longer can because it makes me so depressed. I know it's a cop-out, I know it's not right, but it makes me ill and defeated, and I know it doesn't help to turn a blind eye, but listen. Just listen.
PEOPLE ARE DYING. REAL people with real families, people who are young, people who are younger than I am. They are dying in a war that EVERYONE KNOWS IS WRONG. Everyone knows it. So much so that it isn't endorsed by ANYONE, it's opposed by almost everyone in every sector, liberal or conservative. It isn't just a bunch of hippies running around shouting for world peace anymore, it's everyone. It's you and me, and yet WE'RE STILL THERE. And I don't know what to do about it, now we've created this huge quagmire that is impossible to get out of and I feel terribly bad for the Iraqi people who are there and who have now had their whole world made EVEN MORE unstable because of our arrogance, and that's not all.
THE WORLD IS HEATING UP. It's getting so hot and animals are dying, people are dying, we are going to be TOTALLY FUCKING SCREWED in such a short amount of time. Everyone is starting to feel it. This winter was totally fucking nuts, and it's not just a fluke, it's because of GLOBAL FUCKING WARMING. Climate change or whatever the fuck you want to call it. And it doesn't just mean that we're heating up--it means that the weather is getting EXTREME. Sudden cold spikes and heat waves and TSUNAMIS and HURRICANES and EARTHQUAKES, and it's not going to stop. When I start thinking about this, I feel ILL because I don't think that there's going to be an earth for my children to live on. It's makes me think that the apocalypse is upon us, that we are bringing about our own destruction, and it's going to be here so quickly. And I try to be environmentally conscious, but everything is so tied into everything else, and they make it so damn hard, and I KEEP GETTING THOSE FUCKING PLASTIC BAGS AT THE GROCERY STORE. My house is FULL of them--under the sink and in the cabinet and filling up the closet, and EACH ONE of those motherfuckers take 1,000 years to decompose. ONE THOUSAND YEARS.
And the gas prices and urban sprawl and the decline of culture and the rise of consumerism and the neverending buildup of waste and all these huge companies that are taking over every aspect of our lives and big brother who is always, always watching.
I am so tired of feeling completely useless in this society. So tired of feeling like nothing I do or say will make any kind of difference. Tired of feeding into the machine, tired of supporting things I don't want to support, tired of buying into a society that's screwing itself so royally. There are SO MANY OF US. There are more people on this earth than the combined total of everyone who has already lived and died. And it is so easy to hide behind that huge mass of people because in such big numbers, we all become anonymous, but this is OUR FUTURE. These are OUR LIVES. This is the fate of ALL HUMANITY.
I am just trying to live, and sometimes it is so damn difficult.
I used to read the news every single fucking day, all the way through, every single article, and I no longer can because it makes me so depressed. I know it's a cop-out, I know it's not right, but it makes me ill and defeated, and I know it doesn't help to turn a blind eye, but listen. Just listen.
PEOPLE ARE DYING. REAL people with real families, people who are young, people who are younger than I am. They are dying in a war that EVERYONE KNOWS IS WRONG. Everyone knows it. So much so that it isn't endorsed by ANYONE, it's opposed by almost everyone in every sector, liberal or conservative. It isn't just a bunch of hippies running around shouting for world peace anymore, it's everyone. It's you and me, and yet WE'RE STILL THERE. And I don't know what to do about it, now we've created this huge quagmire that is impossible to get out of and I feel terribly bad for the Iraqi people who are there and who have now had their whole world made EVEN MORE unstable because of our arrogance, and that's not all.
THE WORLD IS HEATING UP. It's getting so hot and animals are dying, people are dying, we are going to be TOTALLY FUCKING SCREWED in such a short amount of time. Everyone is starting to feel it. This winter was totally fucking nuts, and it's not just a fluke, it's because of GLOBAL FUCKING WARMING. Climate change or whatever the fuck you want to call it. And it doesn't just mean that we're heating up--it means that the weather is getting EXTREME. Sudden cold spikes and heat waves and TSUNAMIS and HURRICANES and EARTHQUAKES, and it's not going to stop. When I start thinking about this, I feel ILL because I don't think that there's going to be an earth for my children to live on. It's makes me think that the apocalypse is upon us, that we are bringing about our own destruction, and it's going to be here so quickly. And I try to be environmentally conscious, but everything is so tied into everything else, and they make it so damn hard, and I KEEP GETTING THOSE FUCKING PLASTIC BAGS AT THE GROCERY STORE. My house is FULL of them--under the sink and in the cabinet and filling up the closet, and EACH ONE of those motherfuckers take 1,000 years to decompose. ONE THOUSAND YEARS.
And the gas prices and urban sprawl and the decline of culture and the rise of consumerism and the neverending buildup of waste and all these huge companies that are taking over every aspect of our lives and big brother who is always, always watching.
I am so tired of feeling completely useless in this society. So tired of feeling like nothing I do or say will make any kind of difference. Tired of feeding into the machine, tired of supporting things I don't want to support, tired of buying into a society that's screwing itself so royally. There are SO MANY OF US. There are more people on this earth than the combined total of everyone who has already lived and died. And it is so easy to hide behind that huge mass of people because in such big numbers, we all become anonymous, but this is OUR FUTURE. These are OUR LIVES. This is the fate of ALL HUMANITY.
I am just trying to live, and sometimes it is so damn difficult.