Fix You
Tears stream down your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I will try to fix you
My years have being a horrible brother have culminated in my little brother turning into a depressed, withdrawn, angry little boy. I'm so afraid I fucked him up for the rest of his life. Nearly since the day he was born, I was wrestling with him and hurting him and belittling him. I didn't mean to, I was just a stupid little boy myself. Now the more and more I face manhood, the more I see the mistakes that I've made.
In general, I've just seemed so withdrawn myself. It's like I have so much going on inside myself, so much passion and energy, and I just don't know how to show it.
But other than all of that, today was a good day. I spent the earlier part of the day with Mary Jo, Amanda, Brendan, and then we walked over to Burger King and then Mairin came. Then we all went our separate ways for a little while, then we all met back up at Hannah's, and Josh was there too. We stayed on Hannah's porch for a while, then walked to the store and then went swimming. I was going to see Jackdaw, but I'm not really in the "get fucking crazy" mood that I'd need to be for Jackdaw.
Mary Jo makes me feel really happy. Even though we've been going out for not too long, she really means alot to me. But sometimes I feel like I don't know how to show it, I guess. And sometimes it's kind of hard, especially around Josh and Hannah, 'cause no offense to them, but I kind of feel a little weird when I see them hanging all over each other and being all super-PDA. I'm really happy for the both of them, but it's just awkward for everyone, I think. I know everyone reads each other's Livejournals and I don't want to cause drama or anything, but it's pressuring sometimes. Then again, maybe it's just me.
I guess I'm just not feeling like I'm showing people enough affection. So to everyone I know and hold dear, I care about you all and I want to let you all know that. In some way, you all mean something very special to me.
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I will try to fix you
My years have being a horrible brother have culminated in my little brother turning into a depressed, withdrawn, angry little boy. I'm so afraid I fucked him up for the rest of his life. Nearly since the day he was born, I was wrestling with him and hurting him and belittling him. I didn't mean to, I was just a stupid little boy myself. Now the more and more I face manhood, the more I see the mistakes that I've made.
In general, I've just seemed so withdrawn myself. It's like I have so much going on inside myself, so much passion and energy, and I just don't know how to show it.
But other than all of that, today was a good day. I spent the earlier part of the day with Mary Jo, Amanda, Brendan, and then we walked over to Burger King and then Mairin came. Then we all went our separate ways for a little while, then we all met back up at Hannah's, and Josh was there too. We stayed on Hannah's porch for a while, then walked to the store and then went swimming. I was going to see Jackdaw, but I'm not really in the "get fucking crazy" mood that I'd need to be for Jackdaw.
Mary Jo makes me feel really happy. Even though we've been going out for not too long, she really means alot to me. But sometimes I feel like I don't know how to show it, I guess. And sometimes it's kind of hard, especially around Josh and Hannah, 'cause no offense to them, but I kind of feel a little weird when I see them hanging all over each other and being all super-PDA. I'm really happy for the both of them, but it's just awkward for everyone, I think. I know everyone reads each other's Livejournals and I don't want to cause drama or anything, but it's pressuring sometimes. Then again, maybe it's just me.
I guess I'm just not feeling like I'm showing people enough affection. So to everyone I know and hold dear, I care about you all and I want to let you all know that. In some way, you all mean something very special to me.