I'm hopeless.
I wish so desperately I could trust someone.
I wish there wasn't this wall between us, always... no matter how much I wish there wasn't.
How do people do it?
I wish I didn't have to attack first/ leave first / fight first before anyone has even done anything bad.
I wish I didn't see the malice / deceptiveness/ bad in people, when there is none.
Why do I so desperately search for all the evil? Any little crack that I can become defensive about & leave.
... just so i can conclude that there was a good reason this never worked.
I just wish I could believe that there are good people out there, with good intentions ... & no one is perfect.
I know this, but seems like I don't believe it.
I wish there wasn't this wall between us, always... no matter how much I wish there wasn't.
How do people do it?
I wish I didn't have to attack first/ leave first / fight first before anyone has even done anything bad.
I wish I didn't see the malice / deceptiveness/ bad in people, when there is none.
Why do I so desperately search for all the evil? Any little crack that I can become defensive about & leave.
... just so i can conclude that there was a good reason this never worked.
I just wish I could believe that there are good people out there, with good intentions ... & no one is perfect.
I know this, but seems like I don't believe it.