(no subject)
I read somewhere that depression is anger turned inward. This, I believe, is very true.
I wonder why I have so much anger this week. I am unable to remove my claws from it, it seems they only sink deeper. I don't want to confront it, I can't even put it into words so I'd rather show what I'm feeling. But subtleties are slow and torturous, and no one seems to be able to read my mind. Perhaps a little self importance is what I've conceived in recent days, and the calamity of it is making me sick. Whatever it is, I need to let it go.
I am a firm believer that it is always my choice to walk away from the things that don't suit me. Why is it, though, that I feel like I have blocks of cement tied to my feet? Have I put them there? How do I get them off? I feel like I should be so far away from here right now. There are a million little tiny questions that I feel like I should write down, and at the same time I'm afraid the answers wouldn't be worth hurting you. This has all got to pass somehow.