(no subject)
Hello. Yes, it's been awhile, has it not? Unfortunately, nothing good has been going on in my life. How sad is that?
Well, first off, I may as well tell you all. I got fired. -.- Yes, this is me being a loser and not having a job. My friends seem fairly optimistic for me that I'll find a job really quick, but I'm starting to get nervous and I've only been unemployed for 2 days. Sadly, Menards was my life, and now my life is...well, over. So, yes. I'm getting quite nervous. I know I have a lot of friends willing to help me out, but the last thing I want to do is bum money from people. But, shit. I feel like a *huge* loser not having a job.
I've spent a lot of time the past week being really unhappy about the way my life has ended up. I haven't been able to look back at much and say that I'm happy or proud of the way things turned out. I have very few close friends and very little to show for the friends that I do have. I mean, for fuck's sake, my friends don't write songs about me, or feel like they need to die for me. They wouldn't drop everything to be by my side at 1 am when I can't do anything because I'm crying too hard to even whimper their name into my phone anymore.
I've also realized I've spent way too much of my life caring about what other people are going to think of me if I do certain things. Or that I've spent way too much time being too nervous for my safety and the safety of my friends, so I've missed out things that could have been really fun, and new, and in turn, could have changed my life for the better. I guess you could say that I'm starting to have a mid life crisis...although I'm not quite in the middle of my life yet.
...and yet, while I'm sitting here feeling sorry for myself, I could be out *attempting* to make life better. Maybe. There's not too much job hunting I can do on the weekends. So, yes. I suck at everything in life.
On a happier note, my DMB concerts are next Saturday and Sunday...I'm seeing Seether at the county fair in August, I'm seeing Breaking Benjamin/Evans Blue/Dropping Daylight August 1 at the Rave, and possibly Dashboard Confessional at the Rave July 27th. All tickets are paid for/being bought for me by my friends (who feel bad for me cuz I'm a loser).
I think I need to get out of the house -.-
Well, first off, I may as well tell you all. I got fired. -.- Yes, this is me being a loser and not having a job. My friends seem fairly optimistic for me that I'll find a job really quick, but I'm starting to get nervous and I've only been unemployed for 2 days. Sadly, Menards was my life, and now my life is...well, over. So, yes. I'm getting quite nervous. I know I have a lot of friends willing to help me out, but the last thing I want to do is bum money from people. But, shit. I feel like a *huge* loser not having a job.
I've spent a lot of time the past week being really unhappy about the way my life has ended up. I haven't been able to look back at much and say that I'm happy or proud of the way things turned out. I have very few close friends and very little to show for the friends that I do have. I mean, for fuck's sake, my friends don't write songs about me, or feel like they need to die for me. They wouldn't drop everything to be by my side at 1 am when I can't do anything because I'm crying too hard to even whimper their name into my phone anymore.
I've also realized I've spent way too much of my life caring about what other people are going to think of me if I do certain things. Or that I've spent way too much time being too nervous for my safety and the safety of my friends, so I've missed out things that could have been really fun, and new, and in turn, could have changed my life for the better. I guess you could say that I'm starting to have a mid life crisis...although I'm not quite in the middle of my life yet.
...and yet, while I'm sitting here feeling sorry for myself, I could be out *attempting* to make life better. Maybe. There's not too much job hunting I can do on the weekends. So, yes. I suck at everything in life.
On a happier note, my DMB concerts are next Saturday and Sunday...I'm seeing Seether at the county fair in August, I'm seeing Breaking Benjamin/Evans Blue/Dropping Daylight August 1 at the Rave, and possibly Dashboard Confessional at the Rave July 27th. All tickets are paid for/being bought for me by my friends (who feel bad for me cuz I'm a loser).
I think I need to get out of the house -.-