[LOG] Saitou & Kajimoto - Hope Is The Thing With Feathers

[saitoupsychout]

Who: Saitou Itaru and Kajimoto Takahisa
What: Kajimoto returns Saitou’s lost gloves to him, and in the process, Saitou finally learns how Kajimoto feels about him.
When: September 15th
Where: Saitou’s office
Rating: PG
Comments: If we could get Saitou's and Kajimoto's names added to the tags, that'd be awesome~ We also seem to be missing a number of the other characters' names in the tags.

Saitou grumbled to himself in frustration as he rummaged through his desk, caught up in an effort to meticulously search his office from top to bottom for what he had lost. “I could’ve sworn I put them in my pocket. Where else on Earth could they be?” He wondered aloud, feeling completely flabbergasted as to how he had managed to lose one of the most important things that he always had with him at all times. As if to remind him yet again of what a foolish folly he had made, he was suddenly hit with details about his paperweight’s personal history up until that point. Cursing over this, the psychologist then let out a sigh before deciding to flop down in his chair to take a moment to breathe, making sure not to directly touch the chair as he did so. Largely because he wasn’t wearing his gloves. He had lost them, in fact, and after searching what felt like half the school, he still had no clue as to where he could have left them.

He had taken them off initially to help Tsuge with some hands-on work for another project that they had planned for the new semester and had decided that work gloves would suit the situation better than his usual more delicate white gloves. He had recalled placing them in his pocket and was certain they were still there when he left to go clean himself up afterwards. However, once he had done so and reached for them in his pocket, they were gone. He had retraced his steps throughout the school hunting for them, receiving jolts of feedback from his psychometry with everything he touched along the way, but they seemed nowhere to be found. No one else seemed to know where they were either, which meant there was a large chance that he wasn’t going to find them at all, no matter where he looked.

Which was upsetting for the teacher. The gloves had been special to him; a gift from his mother a few years back that she had hunted down for him specifically for everyday use while working around the school, not to mention they matched his lab coat. With them gone, he would have to try and dig up some temporary replacements until he could get a new pair. Though he doubted anything he would find in town would be the same.

Kajimoto stretched out one last time in the soft grass, then stood. While the Yoga Club met once a week to practice, Takahisa preferred a daily workout to keep him limber and calm. (Well, as limber and calm as he could be lately, with all the stress over his crush on Saitou-sensei.) He'd taken to practicing outside, usually in the early morning when it was cool and most students were still in bed. But this morning he'd managed to seriously oversleep and he’d only just finished his routine. Shaking his head at himself, he gathered up his mat and other things, intent on returning to the dorms. He was feeling a bit calmer today despite the schedule upset, and was looking forward to practicing with his dolls.

He turned a corner around a row of bushes, his mind on his power practice, and dropped his sweating water bottle. Rolling his eyes at himself, he chased after the escaped bottle, blinking as it came to rest against something soft and white near the bottom of a bush. The puppet master knelt and picked up his bottle, then the white... fabric? Yes, white gloves. Standing, Kajimoto puzzled over them for a second. They looked familiar, but who wore...?

Saitou-sensei. The knowledge went through him like a lightning strike. These looked exactly like the gloves Saitou-sensei wore every day. No, these were his gloves. Little things about them, things that he'd long memorized because of his stupid crush, made it obvious. Immediately a blush rose in the brunet's cheeks. Just thinking of the older man could do that to him. And standing there, holding the handsome teacher's gloves, the gloves he never took off...

...The gloves he never took off. Kajimoto started. Yes, Saitou-sensei never took his gloves off, so why were they here? It didn't make sense. Of course, he could be mistaken about who owned them, but if Saitou-sensei was indeed missing his gloves, they needed to be returned immediately. He quickly took off in the direction of the teacher's office, power practice long forgotten. Now he could only alternate between joy and nervousness at seeing the older man when he hadn't expected to. There was a definite flutter in his chest when he thought of the tall man thanking him for returning his precious gloves. He pushed it away as much as possible when he reached the office, knocking almost timidly on the door. Was he even in there right now?

Saitou jolted out of his half-awake daze upon hearing the knocking on his door. He had been about to opt for taking a nap after exhausting himself in his efforts to find his gloves, not to mention dealing with the constant input from his psychometry had left him feeling mentally worn out. As such, he wasn't exactly in the mood to deal with any chats from anyone, but not wishing to be rude or allow his frustrations to get the best of him, he decided to go ahead and speak to his visitor. "Come in~!" He called out, trying to keep his voice light and free of the irritability he was feeling. Normally he would have also gotten up and gone to the door to personally let his guest in, however, he wasn't wishing to risk accidentally bumping against whoever was there with his ability not under control at that moment. Which made him feel somewhat impolite for it, but he would just have to apologize for it when he had a chance.

Once the door opened, his expression and mood lightened upon seeing one of his favored students enter. "Ah. Kajimoto-kun~! Good morning~!" Saitou greeted the young man cheerfully, smiling at him warmly. "What brought you by today? Or are you just dropping by to see my face~" His smile turned more playful with his teasing words. Even if he was dealing with a troublesome situation at the moment, he couldn't seem to remain upset at all while the puppeteer was present. Something about him simply always made him want to smile.

Kajimoto closed the door behind him, telling his heart firmly that it needed to stop racing. Of course, it listened as much as it ever did and continued pounding as he turned to face the teacher. He could feel his cheeks turning pink at the suggestion that he was here to see Saitou-sensei’s face. While he was quite happy for the chance, he shook his head. He had business here. “Actually, there’s something... well, here, let me show you.” He’d tucked the gloves into the pocket of his pants right before he’d opened the door, and now he pulled them out to show the teacher. “I was walking past some bushes and found these. They look like yours, but I wasn’t sure because I've never known you to take them off before. But if they were yours I wanted to return them right away."

He glanced down at them, trepidation and excitement alternating through him, and approached the teacher's desk. He held the gloves out, offering them to the man. Closer up now, he noticed more details about the teacher. Was Saitou-sensei looking a little sleepy? The puppeteer couldn’t tell for sure, but he seemed like it. Regardless, the man looked as handsome as ever, and Takahisa’s hand shook minutely with the surge of feelings for his instructor. Really, it was a bit unfair for someone to be that kind, warm, and intelligent, and be handsome too. He bit his lip, reprimanding himself. He should at least wait until he was away from the tall man before daydreaming about him.

Staring at the boy curiously, wondering what he could possibly need to show him, Saitou's eyes went wide when Kajimoto suddenly pulled out what he had lost and been searching for all morning. "My gloves!!" He exclaimed in delighted surprise, his smile growing all the more over the unexpected retrieval. "I've been looking for them everywhere and had thought I'd lost them for good!" Finally getting up from his seat, he reached out his hands to eagerly accept the beloved gloves. Once he had them back on, he would be able to relax again. "Thank you so much for bringing them back to me, Kajimoto-kun. These particular gloves have become incredibly important to me. So you can't even begin to imagine how much I adore you right now for finding them for me~ Consider me indebted to you." He offered the young man a genuinely thankful and appreciative look, feeling glad that he could say that he had come to gain as close of a friendship as he had with his student.

As the gloves were dropped into his awaiting hands, Saitou prepared to immediately place them back on, however, he gave pause when his psychometry abruptly kicked in. Light flickering across his eyes as the tell-tale sign of it triggering itself, the teacher found himself caught off guard and confused as to why it was happening when his personal items were normally immune to the effects of his psychometry due to him having consistent and sole contact with them. When he was suddenly shown Kajimoto in the process of finding the gloves, he found his answer. Due to Kajimoto's contact with them, he was now being fed the information on how the gloves had gotten back into his possession. Which he supposed he didn't mind seeing, as he was grateful towards the puppeteer for helping him.

Unfortunately, Saitou hadn't been prepared for what he found out in the process. The wave of emotions that came with what he saw was almost suffocating in how strong they were, yet incredibly heartfelt as well. Suddenly the problem that Kajimoto had been dealing with in Yoga Club and had remained vague about made a lot more sense. It seemed he was the cause of the boy's anxiety, as well as the target of his affections. The once cheerful smile quickly disappeared from his face as he realized this, and as the last of the information was fed to him and he blinked himself out of his psychometry-induced daze, all he could seem to do in that moment was stare forlornly in complete silence at the teen.

The joy in the teacher’s reaction to seeing the gloves had been all the thanks Kajimoto had needed, and he blushed at the effusive response. While it thrilled him that he’d been able to help the man he loved by finding something that meant so much to him, the suggestion that the tall man was indebted to him was quietly demurred. It was enough that he’d seen such a bright and beautiful smile on Saitou-sensei’s face and knew he was the cause. He’d hold onto that memory as long as he could and treasure it. Kajimoto dropped the gloves into the instructor’s hands and stepped back, ready to leave. Surely the older man had things to do now that his gloves had been returned, and the puppet master was loathe to interrupt him. Plus he had his own power practice to get to.

But then Saitou’s reaction to... well, something... stopped him. His smile disappeared. His eyes became unfocused and flickered briefly, as though he was rapidly reading something. Takahisa frowned, not sure what to make of it. He reached out, thinking to touch the teacher on the shoulder and ask if he was okay. But he thought better of it and dropped his hand, curling his fingers into a fist to avoid that temptation again. He shouldn’t be so familiar with the man just because Saitou-sensei smiled a lot around him. The puppeteer was about to get alarmed at the change that had come over the teacher when whatever it was abruptly ended. He blinked at the sad look that was aimed his way, completely baffled. “...Sensei? Is... everything okay?” Which was stupid to ask because obviously it wasn’t, but he wasn’t sure what else to say.

Saitou continued to wordlessly stare at Kajimoto, his sad expression having shifted into more of a look of troubled uncertainty as his mind boggled and attempted to think things out. Though one thing was for certain, and that was that he was unsure of what to do about the situation that they had now been placed in. That much was proven when he opened his mouth in an effort to try and speak to the boy, only to realize that he wasn't sure what to say to him and quickly shut his mouth again. Just how exactly was he supposed to handle something like this? It was true that he had dealt with people having crushes on him before, and oftentimes he had found out by accident in situations like this. He had even had other students of his have crushes on him in the past, but this was different; just from experiencing the emotions Kajimoto had been feeling towards him, it was very apparent that this was way beyond the point of just a silly little school crush. This boy...this young man was very obviously feeling the full-fledged complicated adult emotion of love for him.

Yet he hadn't realized it at all. Like the clueless fool he was, he had been completely oblivious to something this intense and seen it as nothing more than Kajimoto simply being a good student who also just happened to be something of a teacher's pet who always wanted to do something to help. It made him wonder how many months this had been going on, that he had felt like this and Saitou had just kept looking the other way. Had it been going on ever since the puppet master had arrived there? No, that couldn't be possible. Such things as 'love at first sight' were just fairytale sayings, after all.

"...H-How long?" He managed to stammer out quietly after considering the question. "How long have you been feeling this way? ...About me?" A part of him felt nervous to hear the truth, though he wasn't really sure why.

Kajimoto was getting really worried now. Saitou-sensei wasn’t answering him at all, and even cut himself off the first time he spoke. He looked to be chewing on some thought that was only confusing him more and more, and it made the puppeteer nervous for reasons he couldn’t explain. What in the world could bother the tall man so suddenly that he’d cease all conversation to think about it? It was completely unlike him. Takahisa was about to walk around the desk, and his heart be damned about being too close, to see if there was something seriously wrong with the teacher. But just as he’d made up his mind to do it, Saitou-san finally spoke, and asked him a question that caused his brain to stutter to a halt. It almost sounded... like he knew. But no. No, no, no. Kajimoto knew he hadn’t given anything away. He’d been careful. And the only person he’d told had secrets of his own. Tsuge-sensei wouldn’t tell anyone something that had been said in confidence. The instructor must have meant something else. Right? “S-sensei? I-I don’t understand what you--” His eyes dropped to the teacher’s hands, still holding the gloves rather than wearing them. And that was when it clicked.

Color drained from his face as he recalled their first day of class, and the way Saitou-sensei explained his psychometry ability. How he could read events and even emotions that occurred in relation to any object. Like the emotions Kajimoto had been feeling ever since he’d picked up the gloves outside. Those stupid, stupid emotions that he knew were going to get him in trouble one day. His heart skipped a beat as he shifted his gaze to Saitou-san’s still-concerned face. He felt like he’d been punched, the breath forced out of him and his chest aching. He had to get out. The puppet master backed away from the desk until his back hit the office door. He had to leave. He couldn’t face this now. He hadn’t had time to prepare himself for the rejection!

“I should go,” he said, marveling a little at how calm his voice sounded when he was panicking inside. His hand made a few swipes against the wall, seeking the doorknob. “I’m sure you’re busy, and I have practice.” There! He grabbed the knob and turned toward the door, intending to run as soon as he could get it open.

Not in the mood for games at a time like this, Saitou had been about to call Kajimoto on his poorly attempted bluff, before the boy seemed to realize for himself that there wasn't any way for him to continue playing innocent at this point. Except it seemed that instead of coming right out and admitting to things by telling him what he wanted to hear like he had hoped, the puppeteer was now turning frightfully pale, looking all the part as if he had just seen something terrifying, and began steadily backing away from him. Becoming all the more confused by this behavior, the tall man felt at a loss for what else to say to the teen that could get him to calm down and speak to him. Though when he finally did speak again, attempting to excuse himself from the teacher's presence so he could escape out the door to go and likely try to hide from him somewhere, he quickly started saying the first things that came to mind.

"No! Wait!" Saitou loudly called out to his student, dropping his now far less important gloves on his desk and making his way around over to the boy, ready to stop him if he really did try to leave without speaking to him at all about any of this. "Kajimoto-- ...Takahisa-kun, please answer my question." He attempted to calm himself down and sound more sure of himself. He imagined he wasn't looking too impressive or approachable to the young man at the moment and every bit helped if it would more easily get Kajimoto to cooperate and speak to him. "I promise, I'm not going to get upset with you over any of this. ...I just want to talk to you about it."

Of all the ways this conversation might have happened, never once had Kajimoto envisioned it going like this. He bowed his head, blinking back tears. This was happening in the absolute worst way possible, and he still only had himself to blame. The puppet master stayed facing the door, although he didn’t try to leave just yet. But he wanted to. More than anything, right now he just wanted to run away, find someplace quiet and deserted, and have a good cry. But running away would solve nothing, and he knew it. It wouldn’t undo Saitou-sensei knowing, so the rejection was going to happen sooner or later. He sighed mournfully. Better to get it over with, right? With an effort of will, he let go of the last strands of hope that the teacher could return his feelings. It was time to face the truth.

He laughed softly at the promise the teacher gave him, ignoring how it sounded more like a sob. “I know you wouldn’t get upset, sensei. You’re far too kind for something like that.” A fond smile found its way to his lips, but it was still tinged with sadness and resignation. He looked down at his hands, still not sure he could look the object of his affections in the eye without crying. Saitou-san wanted to know how long he’d been feeling this way? That... was a good question, actually. Slowly, hesitantly, he came clean.

“I... I don’t know when it started being this.” He couldn’t put a name to the feelings yet, unsure if it was too presumptuous to call it ‘love’. “It was... little things at first. You were so kind, so patient. You cared about all of your students, and you seemed to genuinely like me as a person.” He took a breath to steady himself, and pushed on. “But... there were other things. You were funny... you were smart. Compassionate. H-h-h...” Takahisa swallowed, his cheeks turning a light pink. “Really... handsome. I knew, by the time I realized the last one, that I was in trouble. But... it just... snowballed from there, and it seemed like the more I got to know you, the stronger I felt about you.” Biting his lip, he hurried on. “But I know. I mean, that it’s impossible. If nothing else, Shiba-san... So-so I never... never expected you to-- so, it’s okay. You’re not going to surprise me when you let me down. Really.”

Saitou listened patiently as Kajimoto tried his best to explain himself in the less than pleasant state that he knew the boy was in. Hearing him speak the way he did as he spoke of him and described the many things he saw in the man, it seemed rather apparent that his favorite student had definitely spent a lot of time watching him in ways that he never would have suspected until today. The way he normally behaved had never given it away to him. Of course, there was incidents like at times during the Yoga Club meetings where he would act an odd way, but perhaps because he was the way he was, he had simply brushed it aside as nothing to really think too much on since Kajimoto would tell him what's on his mind in due time if he wished. Or so he had always assumed, at least. Though considering he was the source of the issue, he supposed the boy wouldn't be in a hurry to do so.

Despite the seriousness of the situation, Saitou couldn't help but smile over the puppet master's apparent embarrassment in complimenting him on his looks. The psychologist had grown up and grown older being more than aware of his attractiveness in the eyes of others, both male and female, and while he had used it to his advantage in his younger and more foolish years, he had never really much understood it, as he didn't consider himself classically handsome by any means. As such, it still always continued to amuse him how others would get flustered when calling him handsome of all people. Though in the case of Kajimoto, it also seemed to feel rather "cute" in a way, possibly because the young man's youth and innocence seemed to show through in such moments despite his efforts to try and act older and more mature than his years at times.

Though it was that youth and innocence that made it difficult to handle this situation and he let out a troubled sigh upon listening to Kajimoto go into his 'I totally understand that you're going to reject me and I'm okay with that' rationalizing, because he knew the part commonly left unsaid in such a conversation was something akin to 'even if it's pretty obvious I'm going to go and cry somewhere after this and then probably try to avoid you.' Which was the part he wanted to prevent the most, even if he was sure that in some way, the boy likely wasn't going to leave his office in a pleasant mood, no matter what he tried to say. Still, he did his best to try and explain what he could from his own side in return. "Takahisa-kun, I think you may be painting me in a more perfect light than you think I am, but I'm not going to belittle you over it at all or tell you that you shouldn't feel the way you do. You're the only one who truly knows your heart. Of course, I may not understand why you would choose to direct those feelings towards someone old enough to be your father, but I'm not about to lecture you for it or treat you as a child. If anything, I'm flattered~ Undeserving, maybe, but yes, still flattered nonetheless." He offered Kajimoto a warm smile once again as proof that he honestly did appreciate the boy's affections.

His expression only lasted that way for a moment though as Saitou switched to the subject of the one whom he assumed Kajimoto believed to be in the way of matters from what he had said. "As for Shiba-sensei..." He started, but paused as his own complicated emotions concerning the woman came to the surface. "...as much as I've come to care for her, I can't say there's really anything going on between us currently. She's still just a close friend that I've simply taken out to a few places. So please don't become upset with her for any of this. She is not responsible for anything I say to you."

Kajimoto’s head whipped around, a denial already on his lips the moment Saitou-sensei finished speaking. “No, sensei, that’s not-- I didn’t mean it like that.” Sighing, he ran a hand through his hair, trying to organise his thoughts so he wouldn’t sound jealous or unreasoning. He absolutely didn’t want to be misunderstood on this subject, at least. “I would never presume that if there wasn’t something going on between you two, that-that we would...” He grunted, not wanting to spell anything out that might cause discomfort. He pushed on, getting to the point. “ I would never blame her for any of this. I simply meant that I understood. There is someone else in your heart, someone you care for.” Considering for a moment, he added in a low mutter, “But apparently she’s blind for not seeing what she has.” It actually hurt him a little, knowing the teacher was dealing with what seemed to be his own feelings of hopelessness. Kajimoto turned back toward the door, but it didn’t stop the ache he felt for the older man. “I am sorry things don’t seem to be working out how you wanted them to,” he said softly, realizing as he said the words just how sincere he was. Putting his own heartache aside for a moment, he wanted the tall man to be happy, whomever he chose to be with. And he was sorry it hadn’t happened for the teacher.

“As for my feelings... you may feel I’m being naive in my assessment, but I’m merely being honest. If I’m biased, so be it.” He paused, blushing as he forced himself to say the next bit. “Your age... I know better than to believe the trite line about it being just a number, especially when Tsuge-sensei disagrees so vehemently.” Despite the surreal conversation he was having, he found his lips twitching upward at the corner when he thought of the crusty PE teacher who was far kinder than most people realized. “I realize that it’s a major objection for you, especially when it’s compounded by the fact that you’re a teacher and I’m a student.” Turning back slightly, he gathered up his courage and looked Saitou-san in the eye. “But it never was for me. If anything, I liked that you were older and more mature than the students around here.”

He stopped, looking down as his courage fled. He wrapped his arms around himself as though cold, even though it was an unusually warm September day outside. “I’ve never thought of my... feelings... to be something worthy of being considered ‘deserved’ or ‘undeserved’. They just were, whether I wanted them or not. I... I would have told you, eventually. You saw how I was in Yoga Club, it was getting harder and harder to hide it. I think some of the others knew. I was always afraid something I’d say or do would give it away and you’d figure it out. Not the way you did,” he said with a self-deprecating laugh as he nodded in the direction of the instructor’s hands, “But somehow. I just... wanted to work up the courage to say it myself, I guess. Once I could stop convincing myself that somehow, some way, maybe you could feel the same.” He looked up at Saitou, and suddenly gave the object of his affection a heartbroken but genuine smile. “It was definitely a bittersweet dream.” But it was time to wake up.

When Kajimoto attempted to compliment him by insisting Shiba didn't know what she was missing, Saitou shook his head in defense of the counselor's interests. "She's not blind. She's just a bit oblivious, I suppose you could say. But then, she wasn't the only one to be in that position." He offered a smile over the irony, considering he himself had been just as oblivious to Kajimoto's own feelings up until this point. So he definitely understood what it was like to be in the woman's position. "And I haven't exactly gone out of my way to make things obvious to her, so I suppose I can only blame myself if she hasn't seen anything in me." A part of it was admittedly due to nervousness over attempting to make a bigger show of his interests. It had been almost a decade since the last time he had been in a relationship. Being rusty in knowing how to handle himself in such a situation was an understatement.

"But my own awkward chase after someone aside, Tsuge-san may not necessarily have the best grip on handling relationships himself. I came to know the man's whole life before he came to this school thanks to my psychometry and it seemed rather obvious to me that he intentionally avoids ending up in relationships, even when it's obvious he wants to be with that someone. So take what he says with a grain of salt." Mentioning the man, it made Saitou curious as to what exactly Kajimoto had been talking to the old marine about. Considering the topic at hand, he figured he could garner a guess though. "With some people, age isn't a factor at all, nor is the idea of being teacher and student. ...I know Sakaki-sensei certainly didn't have any problems with either." He muttered disapprovingly as he recalled the music teacher's lecherous earlier days before he chose to settle down with Hanamura. "I admit that the fact that you are my student doesn't trouble me so much as the generations gap does, but even so, in such a situation, one has to worry about whether or not they could be considered abusing their position of authority to take advantage of a student. It's a thin blurred line to try and walk and it could lead to a lot of trouble." Something that Saitou had always kept in mind anytime a student admitted to having a crush on him. Even if for some reason he was able to put aside the fact that there was a considerable age gap, it was just never worth the trouble such a relationship could bring.

Though he knew that Kajimoto couldn't exactly be considered like the rest of those who had tried before him. None of the others had ever had the same depth to their affections for him like the puppeteer did, and because of that, it made it all the more difficult to simply just turn him away and reject his feelings. "We often imagine something different than what really ends up happening when it comes to admitting feelings. But the truth is, when you catch someone unawares by telling them, it's likely that they're not going to know how to react to what they've just been told. They can't return feelings that they hadn't even considered before." Saitou explained, admitting to his own situation at the moment in regards to the young man. He then paused for a second to consider his words, letting out a breath. "But that doesn't mean that they can't start considering it once it's known to them."

Kajimoto tried to suppress the grimace when Saitou-sensei explained why Shiba-san hadn't already fallen for him. He knew logically that it made sense. Saitou-san had been in the same position, so he understood in a way. A part of Takahisa still couldn't believe that the counselor hadn't fallen for the tall man on her own, even if she hadn't known about his own feelings for her. It might be his bias talking, but that was how he felt. He would take the teacher's word for it, though. At the very least, he understood about not wanting to be obvious about it. The puppeteer could definitely sympathise. He said nothing, but nodded knowingly when Saitou-sensei warned him about Tsuge-sensei's aversion to relationships. Oh yes, they'd talked about that too. And he could see the logic in the man's reasoning. But it seemed to be a subject of differing opinions for the two instructors. He left the subject alone, though. What had been told to him was said in confidence, even if Tsuge-sensei hadn't breathed a word about him keeping quiet. It was an unspoken promise between them, and he would honor it.

Takahisa couldn't help but blanch just a bit when the topic changed to the age difference and the subject of abuse of authority. He hated to admit it, but he could see why it would be a problem, and one he hadn't even considered. In his mind, he'd been more worried that the tall man would think of a student like him more as a child than a man. He felt that he was someone more mature than most his age, but that might not make a difference to the man in front of him. And if the legal ramifications didn't bother Saitou-san as much as the age difference, that was saying something. Kajimoto bit his lip. Yes, the 20+ year difference was something that would give most people pause. Especially when he was only 17, rather young and immature by most standards. He would have said something then about it, reassured Saitou-san that he still wasn't expecting a favorable reply under such circumstances, but the teacher went on in a way that made him pause and look the older man in the eye. His breath stuttered out of him, because it sounded like... well...

"You make it sound like you just need time to think about it and you might feel the same way for me," Kajimoto said with a short laugh. Which was silly, when the teacher had just outlined why he would have a problem with any relationship involving the puppet master. And that was before considering it, when he might still decide not to risk it for Takahisa's sake. Biting his bottom lip, he realized that that one sentence had fanned the sparks of hope back to life despite his best efforts to put them out. The look he gave the tall man was almost pleading. "But you-- I mean, even... considering them..." It was more than he'd expected. The puppeteer hadn't thought the teacher would laugh at him to his face and throw him out, but he had expected a gentle let-down and a compassionate list of reasons why it would never work out. Not this. He didn't want to hope. He really didn't. But he did, because if he was good enough, if his feelings could be returned... He tightened his arms around himself, unsure how to feel. His heart wanted to fly in a hundred directions at once. "You shouldn't tease, Saitou-san," he said finally, giving another pained laugh. Yes, a joke. The tall man liked those. This must be another one.

Saitou frowned as he watched his student's reaction to his words. The uncomfortable laughter, the self-hugging he was doing, they were obvious defense mechanisms being used to try and help him cope with the situation. He had seen it done enough in both his work at the school and during his time with the police to know when someone was trying to protect themselves from something they were dealing with. Which was not the result the psychologist had been trying to aim for. It seemed he wasn't doing so well in his efforts to keep the boy from getting upset. Sighing at himself over this, he rubbed at the back of his neck, trying to smooth out the bunched up nerves there that were building up due to him stressing himself over matters.

"I'm not teasing you, Takahisa-kun. Please stop looking at everything with such a negative outlook. It doesn't help you or me and especially not with what we're trying to handle here." He scolded the young man, admittedly becoming a bit frustrated. However, he stopped and silently scolded himself for this, having not wanted to let himself become that way while he was trying to manage the situation. He then attempted to start over and put things in a way that were clearer to the teen. "Listen to me," Unthinking, as he leaned over, Saitou reached his still bare hand up to cup the side of Kajimoto's face, turning it to look up at him. Of course, due to this, his psychometry immediately kicked in, flashing moments from Kajimoto's life all the way back to his birth before his eyes. He grimaced and cursed himself for the mistake, having not wanted to do that to Kajimoto, especially considering it was an invasion of one's privacy doing so. Though admittedly, it had explained a lot more to him about the boy and why he was the person he was, along with his feelings.

As the light stopped flickering across his eyes and his vision cleared, he once again tried to speak. "...I know life hasn't exactly left you with a lot of reason to try and throw caution to the wind with something as complicated as relationships, and considering I can't exactly promise anything to you since I honestly have no idea what to do about this, that probably doesn't give you much in the way of reason for positive thinking." Saitou admitted with a self-deprecating shrug, before offering the boy a warm smile. "But I can say that I don't mind trying to at least see what I can do to make you happy in a way that's close to what you are wishing for, if you would like me to."

Kajimoto winced when he was scolded. Dammit, the last thing he’d wanted to do was have Saitou-sensei angry at him. But he’d been too defensive, too ready to push away hope so he wouldn’t be hurt again. It was a habit he'd always had, going back to the beginning of his abilities and his parents' reaction. But that was no excuse. He should have been more mature about it. Takahisa was about to apologize when his face was turned. He felt a light blush staining his cheeks from the gentle but firm touch, realizing too late that the taller man still hadn't covered his bare hands. The puppeteer's eyes widened when he saw the same reaction Saitou-san had had when he'd held his gloves. Was the teacher reading... him? His flush spread downward at the thought. How much was he seeing? Part of him wanted to back away, to break the contact and hide what secrets he had left, but he stayed where he was. As private as he was about his life, he didn't want to push the instructor away and upset him again.

When the visions (or whatever it was that Saitou-san experienced when he touched things) stopped, Kajimoto held his breath. The long-haired man admitted that Kajimoto wasn't exactly wrong to think the way he had, and the puppet master nodded slightly. He could admit that the way he'd grown up had been a bit dysfunctional thanks to his parents' overzealous faith. He wanted to open himself up more, though-- to take more of a risk. Saitou-san was worth it, in his mind. More than worth it. He nodded again when the teacher reminded him that nothing could be promised right now, since he'd never considered the situation before. Kajimoto completely understood. That the other was considering it now made him smile, soft and genuine. When Saitou-san smiled at him, his heart melted completely. The warmth in it almost brought tears to his eyes. He always wanted Saitou-sensei to look at him like that.

And then the promise that he would try for Takahisa's sake left the puppeteer almost giddy. It was like surfacing from deep underwater. The pressure he'd been under for so long was completely gone, and he could finally breathe again. But he had his own version of 'the bends' , too. At the moment he was stunned over being accepted, even if it was on something like a trial basis. That was far more than he'd dare to hope for. He tried to speak, to say anything at all in response. Thank you. Or You're too kind. Or even Don't try so hard for my sake that you end up miserable, please. But the words got stuck in his throat and he couldn't get any of them out. So he gave up and stepped forward, intending to show the instructor when he couldn't tell him. He wrapped his arms around Saitou's whipcord-thin body, pulling the older man into a light hug and resting his cheek on the other's chest. Kajimoto closed his eyes against the sting of tears. He'd never before understood why some people cried when they were happy. Now he did.

Saitou was admittedly surprised when Kajimoto pulled him into a hug. He had expected the puppeteer to be a bit on the shocked side over having him responding positively at all, even in a partial sense, towards his affections, so the stunned silence and inability to reply hadn't been surprising. But considering that, he had figured Kajimoto would still be too flabbergasted at that moment to even accept what he had offered to him, not to mention, up until this point, the boy had turned into a flinching blushing mess whenever the psychologist so much as looked at him in a certain way. The thought of him initiating physical contact was unexpected, to say the least. Still, once getting over his astonishment, Saitou found himself smiling softly down at his student, wrapping his long arms around him and affectionately hugging him back.

For a moment, he simply stood there in silence, gently petting the young man's head in comfort in hopes of getting him to calm down further now that things seemed to have been talked out and settled, or at least for the time being in regards to this matter. There was still things they would have to deal with in time if Saitou planned to follow through with what he had said, plus there were now things that he wished to question Kajimoto about after having seen into his past, but there was time for that later. He didn't want to trouble the boy further with anything that wasn't important right then. "So I take it that you approve of my suggestion?" He eventually asked, breaking the quiet and hoping the puppet master had calmed enough to speak properly.

Kajimoto came to his senses right about the time that he felt those long arms wrap around him, and wondered if he might set the teacher’s lab coat on fire with his blush. He didn’t know what had overcome him in that instant and pushed him to get so handsy. Relief? That was part of it. Joy? That too. And maybe a bit of desperate need to reaffirm that he wasn’t talking to a hallucination, that this was all real and not some fever dream he was having back outside because he’d fallen asleep during his morning yoga routine. But the feel of the thin but solid body in his arms, the scent of his aftershave (cologne? Takahisa didn’t know, but it was really nice), the sound of that voice under his burning ear... Yes, this was very, very real. He pulled away with a polite cough, sure his flush must extend halfway down his body by now.

“I... yes,” he managed, his eyes modestly lowered. “And... thank you. You... you don’t know what it means to me to even have a chance. I know that nothing is set in stone. I would never presume. But even just a chance is so much more than I thought I would ever have with you.” He dared to look up and into Saitou-san’s eyes. “I really hadn’t expected any of this when I came in here. But I’m glad I was the one who found your gloves.” Even with the momentary fear of rejection, even with the dread and worry knotting his stomach, it had been worth it. And now... Well, now he had no idea. He’d never been in a relationship before, something he knew was going to come up in conversation later. But he’d cross that bridge when he came to it. “So what happens now?” he asked, bringing one hand up to scratch absently at the back of his head.

Saitou let go of Kajimoto as he pulled away from him, smiling in amusement and letting out a small chuckle at his continued embarrassed blushing, even when it was due to an action that the teen had initiated. At least he seemed to be in a better mood now, which was what mattered most to the teacher, and he was sure the hug had helped a lot with that. Though listening to Kajimoto thank him in a way that made it sound like he was doing the boy some kind of service with his offer, Saitou's amused smile faltered, replaced with an awkward expression that could only be described as a cross between discomfort and worry as he shook his head at his student's words. "You shouldn't thank me for anything, Takahisa-kun. I'm not doing this as just some polite courtesy towards you. I wouldn't be doing it at all if I didn't believe you had some sway over me." He insisted, waving off the poorly placed gratitude. However, his kind smile quickly resurfaced immediately afterward as he reached out to pat the puppet master's cheek affectionately. "But I'm glad you found my gloves as well. I'd hate to think that I likely would've still been completely in the dark about what you were going through if you hadn't done so."

Of course, there was now the matter of where they went from here now that he did know and was willing to try to attempt something with his student considering that, and when Kajimoto asked, Saitou had to pause and think for a moment. It was a good question. What did happen now? "What happens now is I put my gloves on and try to get some work done. And you should be having power training right about now, if I remember right." He replied, choosing to go with an answer for the here and now, for the time being. "And after that..." He gave a simple shrug, "I suppose we'll just make things up as we go and see where it takes us." It wasn't like he knew what he was doing at all when it came to any of this either, even with plenty of previous, if long past, experience in relationships. So he would just have to figure it all out as he went along.

Kajimoto nodded, understanding Saitou-san’s words. Part of him was insisting that it had to be charity, but the rest chose to believe that the older man wouldn’t do this unless he actually wanted to. Which made him... incredibly happy. So he nodded and tried not to look too happy, with everything said and done. He’d come out of this situation a hell of a lot better than he’d expected. And just when the blush was almost gone, Saitou-sensei patted his cheek and there it was again. He’d probably need to get used to things like that in the future, he thought with a tiny smile as he listened to the tall man’s decision on what they did now. Nothing more for now on what had happened here, but that was to be expected. He’d been told that the long-haired man was still trying to figure out his own feelings on the matter, so nothing else could be done. (At least, nothing that wouldn’t carry future regret for at least one of them if Saitou-san chose not to attempt a relationship with him.)

He could admit that the answer was practical, if nothing else. The teacher most likely had work that was backlogged now because he’d been without his gloves. And if Kajimoto didn’t get a move on, he’d either have to do a half-assed practice session or miss dinner with his friends. “Of course,” he agreed easily. “But I’ll... see you later?” Takahisa did his best to avoid sounding too hopeful. “If not today, then another day soon. For whatever reason.” No reason to make Saitou-sensei think he was pushing for time together, though the offer was open if the older man wanted to talk or just sit in companionable silence. One hand came up to pat down his hair almost self-consciously.

Heading back over to his desk, Saitou picked up his cherished gloves and placed them back on like he had intended from the start of their conversation, up until they had been momentarily forgotten in favor of the dealing with the more important issue at hand. He immediately felt much more comfortable and at ease with them now on and sealing away his troublesome ability, and he let out a soft sigh of relief over it. Though in honesty, he was sure that the fact that they had settled matters for the time being was helping with making him feel better as well. And with any luck, once Kajimoto left, he wouldn't find himself dwelling on any of it too much and could tend to his work in peace.

"That sounds like a good plan to go with, yes~" He agreed with a nod as he walked back towards Kajimoto, still tugging at his gloves to make certain they were in place and completely covering everything they needed to cover. "And if you can't find me here, you're more than welcome to come and drop by my apartment, if you like~ It would give you a chance to see me outside of my work that way as well." Students weren't normally allowed to visit the teachers' apartments above the dorms without express permission, and over the years, Saitou had let very few come to pester him once he had retreated to the relative peace and quiet found in his apartment. Even fewer had ever been invited inside. So it was not something that the man freely offered to just anyone, yet he was giving Kajimoto the privilege to do so and visit him in his own private abode.

Kajimoto smiled a little bashfully at the permission to see Saitou-san in his own home. “I look forward to it,” he managed to say without stuttering, but at this point he was giving up on the notion of not blushing around the man. He’d heard how rare it was for the tall man to allow students into his apartment, so he was both surprised and pleased that the invitation had been extended. And he found himself wanting to know more about Saitou-sensei, to see what he was like when he wasn’t in his teacher mode. He was sure, now that he knew it wouldn’t hurt more to see other sides of the man, that he’d fall even harder for him. But that was something to enjoy later. For now, he had practice and Saitou-san had work. With a silent nod, Kajimoto reached for the door.

Smiling fondly as he watched Kajimoto head for the door, preparing to leave for real this time, Saitou suddenly considered something else he felt he should tell the teen before he headed out. "Takahisa-kun. Wait." He called over to the boy, stopping him. "Before you leave, there's something I should give you." Walking over to him, the teacher reached out and took hold of the back of Kajimoto's head, pulling him forward, closer to him, and leaned down to affectionately place a simple kiss on his student's forehead. It was a small way of both saying goodbye for now and showing that he really meant what he said when he promised to try at a relationship between them. Pulling back away after a moment, he offered the young man a caring smile and a light pat on the cheek as a send off. "Take care and have a good rest of the day~" His voice held a tired note to it as he said the goodbye. Once Kajimoto left, before he tried to do any work, he was definitely planning to crash on his office couch and take that nap that he had been wanting to take earlier, as he certainly needed a bit of rest after all of this.

Kajimoto paused, startled that Saitou-san needed to give him anything. The kiss stunned him. He couldn’t even process it at first. The sensation of those lips on his forehead was so far from anything he might have expected that, even after Saitou-san had pulled away, he could only blink in shock. But then it really hit him what had happened, and why, and his cheeks were burning again. Saitou-san had kissed him. The taller man was being true to his promise to try thinking of the puppet master like that. Takahisa’s heart thumped once, twice in his chest, joy bursting within him. There were so many things he could have said at that moment, but they all got caught in his throat. He’d also picked up on the tired tone of the teacher’s voice, and didn’t want to keep him engaged any longer. In the end, he said nothing, only gave the teacher one more shy smile as he quietly closed the door behind him.

He stood with his hand on the knob still for a moment, trying to absorb the magnitude of what had just happened. It almost seemed strange to see other students walking down the hall as though today was any other day. Except it was, wasn’t it? Just another day, one where he happened to gain a little hope that the one he loved could love him back. That was all. He bit his lip, trying to keep from grinning too much as he pushed away from the door. If he was smiling too much someone would wonder what was up, and he didn’t want anyone prying. This was personal, moreso than anything in his life had ever been before. Although there was one person he could talk to. He’d have to catch the old man in the gym after he’d met with his friends, he thought as he walked outside. The sun shone down on him, blindingly bright, and Kajimoto let out a sharp exhale. He felt like he’d spent four months at the bottom of the ocean: dark, cold, and under constant pressure; now he’d finally surfaced and could breathe again.