...How Things Change...
Wow im sitting here reading thru my friends entries..the last few from the past week or so, and i think to myself, " damn things change". I know that life is full of change and everything but there r some things that dont change..For one, the definition of what a friendship is. I read all these entries and i sit here and think, we are all close to being adults and look how things are being resolved..Thru a computer?? Could the he-said-she-said bullshit still be the cause of breaking and losing friendships?..are friends only those people u spent most of ur time with or arent they the ones who r supposed to make u happy and be there for u to listen or talk? Im not here to defend anyone or pick any sides because luckily, im not part of this drama..If its one thing ive realized now that ive gotten away from the whole "group" thing, is that sometimes we just cant realize that we all make mistakes, that like mayling said, there r flaws, that as friends we NEED to put up with. Friendships are just like relationships except for the sex thing..They are hard...especially the ones that r real. A friend is not someone u spent everyweekend with or just someone u chill with..a friend is someone u know is there for u even if u cant chill...Speaking for myself, I am BASICALLY NEVER around and ive learned to c who my true friends r...Bro ive had a close time with ALL my friends..there have been close seasons with Mayling which lasted like 3 years..then with Belkys..Cindy...Jova..and ivbe always found a closeness with Angelica, Kirelis, Kristie..and then new people come along..and it seems like little by little the old people are replaced..Is that the way it works?? Ok u meet a new friend so ok bye to u..ill talk to u later??...I think that each and every1 of ur friends deserves respect and caring for the memories and time spent on the friendship. I read a lil something a lil while ago that hurt me in a way i didnt expect..I think we've all felt left out at times, but damn does it suck..everyone is aware of who ur close friends are and who considers u what..but then theres certain people that u feel will always consider u a close friend even if u dont spent too much time together..and then u find urself as just any other person to them..it sucks..but thats change right?...I think we all need to sit down and think of all the reasons why we r friends with each person and learn to accept ppl for who and what they r...As for that pride that we all fear to lose..its all BS..when it comes to important losses..pride should be kicked aside..
Maybe its because ive never had a true friendship without drama and for more than just a period of time, but sometimes i doubt true friendships exist..i hope i am wrong and that there are true frienships out there..I guess the only way ill find out is as soon as this high school journey is over...
On another note..God im so sick! I honestly feel like im not gonna make it thru this year..every week is something new!...
The only good thing in my life right now is my relationship w/john..besides out insignificant problems, he's such a bright lil light in my life...along with that, my friendship w/jova, i can relate to her so much, and i know she's a very COMPLICATED person..but shes also very great..Oh and materialistic..i got a car..its not a big deal but now i can move around..ive realized how expensive this whole car deal is, even with a freakin old car!
I wanna improve a few things..I need to get better from my health..Im scared of one thing in particular but hopefully itss just a lil fear..w/e it is, i hope i have plenty of support..Man its affecting everything..I feel horrible about the whole summer school thing..I coulndt even make it thru the 6 weeks..I hate feeling irresponsible and thats exactly what im being..
LIL NOTE to belkys..I miss u..its been more than 2 days since weve talked..i call and u dont pick up or ur line is busy..if u have a lil time, give me a call..
To mayling: Feel better girl..u have toooooo much goinmg for ursels..right a lil list of all the good things u have and ull c it beats the negative
Maybe its because ive never had a true friendship without drama and for more than just a period of time, but sometimes i doubt true friendships exist..i hope i am wrong and that there are true frienships out there..I guess the only way ill find out is as soon as this high school journey is over...
On another note..God im so sick! I honestly feel like im not gonna make it thru this year..every week is something new!...
The only good thing in my life right now is my relationship w/john..besides out insignificant problems, he's such a bright lil light in my life...along with that, my friendship w/jova, i can relate to her so much, and i know she's a very COMPLICATED person..but shes also very great..Oh and materialistic..i got a car..its not a big deal but now i can move around..ive realized how expensive this whole car deal is, even with a freakin old car!
I wanna improve a few things..I need to get better from my health..Im scared of one thing in particular but hopefully itss just a lil fear..w/e it is, i hope i have plenty of support..Man its affecting everything..I feel horrible about the whole summer school thing..I coulndt even make it thru the 6 weeks..I hate feeling irresponsible and thats exactly what im being..
LIL NOTE to belkys..I miss u..its been more than 2 days since weve talked..i call and u dont pick up or ur line is busy..if u have a lil time, give me a call..
To mayling: Feel better girl..u have toooooo much goinmg for ursels..right a lil list of all the good things u have and ull c it beats the negative