(no subject)

Apr 23, 2002 02:12

Is is possible to miss people that are still here? I miss them already and they are not even gone yet. We have all had our good times and our bad. As of late, my world is crumbling around me. I found out who my real friends are and who really cares about me. I also found out things that I am not sure I wanted to hear from Heidi, but things I needed to hear. It is nice that she was able to have absolutely no emotional attachment whatsoever. I can't do that. I am not saying that I became irreversibly attached or anything, but I did what I did because I was with Heidi, not just because I was with someone. She didn't, or at least as far as I can tell. I think hearing that may be what hurt the most today.

Special thanks to Claire for everything tonight. You were right on the money with everything you brought up. You really did help with a lot of different things, everyone did. Thanks also to Heidi for gracing me with her presence when I needed her, even if it was a little awkward.

I love you all....I just wish that I could believe you when you tell me that everything is going to be okay. Right now, I feel that it is just a line of bullshit that you are saying to make me feel better. Hopefully, I'll feel differently tomorrow.
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