(no subject)
I don't ever care to update anymore.
Maybe I'm over tired. It's 2:28AM. I always have so much on my mind. I don't think there's ever a moment that I don't have something to say. That must be rather annoying. Last night was real shaky. I don't know how to overcome my stubbornness so it doesn't help when someone else is stubborn back. By the time I do overcome my stubborn nature, it's too late. I hate falling asleep with a knot in my throat. I always fear that the last night before someone leaves is going to be spent in frustration. I don't enjoy feeling inadequate. I don't enjoy feeling like someone else is inadequate. That is not typically the case. There are times when I feel that I should try and be something other than what I am for the sake of those I care so much about. I may be stubborn but I am also very patient. I sit and listen, even if I don't want to hear the words. I respond, usually with a great understanding. I care about how so and so feels when they fall asleep at night. I take the time to make sure that everything feels alright for that person, even if it costs me and extra half an hour of sleep. Thing is.. I can't fully show my love for another person until I am convinced that they love me first, and to the same extent. It seems that the only time I can ever express how I feel for another person is during a period of conflict or resolution. This never used to be a problem for me. Words could flow with ease and were easily returned, if not offered up first. I guess life is a series of new experiences of which past events really don't help much. I think live journal pretty much sucks, but at 2:47AM where else could I vent? I need to buy a real journal. Anyway..so there is this song by Frente called "Labour of Love".
Maybe I'm over tired. It's 2:28AM. I always have so much on my mind. I don't think there's ever a moment that I don't have something to say. That must be rather annoying. Last night was real shaky. I don't know how to overcome my stubbornness so it doesn't help when someone else is stubborn back. By the time I do overcome my stubborn nature, it's too late. I hate falling asleep with a knot in my throat. I always fear that the last night before someone leaves is going to be spent in frustration. I don't enjoy feeling inadequate. I don't enjoy feeling like someone else is inadequate. That is not typically the case. There are times when I feel that I should try and be something other than what I am for the sake of those I care so much about. I may be stubborn but I am also very patient. I sit and listen, even if I don't want to hear the words. I respond, usually with a great understanding. I care about how so and so feels when they fall asleep at night. I take the time to make sure that everything feels alright for that person, even if it costs me and extra half an hour of sleep. Thing is.. I can't fully show my love for another person until I am convinced that they love me first, and to the same extent. It seems that the only time I can ever express how I feel for another person is during a period of conflict or resolution. This never used to be a problem for me. Words could flow with ease and were easily returned, if not offered up first. I guess life is a series of new experiences of which past events really don't help much. I think live journal pretty much sucks, but at 2:47AM where else could I vent? I need to buy a real journal. Anyway..so there is this song by Frente called "Labour of Love".