sappy songs
"scaping through my head til i dont wanna sleep anymore"..
i did a silly thing last night, drank too much... got too emotional.. and texted jake. he called me thursday night and we talked for a good 30 mins or so.. and it was nice catching up with him, i was genuinely happy for him.. new job,new major, just gettin stuff together. proud of him. it should have ended at that, but unfornately.. when u drink.. u get emotional.. and you let it go.. it doesnt. thank GOD i didnt call him.. just text messages. but they were pretty desperate messages.. I hope i have an "excuse".. family member dies..jake met him.. family member MENTIONS jake right before he dies.. im sad already.. i just added the topping to the emotion cake. " i just want something, i can never have" I guess i wanted him to comfort me. Hes the only friend that had ever met him and understood the full story behind everything. So hes the obvious choice of people to turn to but.. hes also the complicated one.. someone i dont know anymore, havent known for like a year.. but yet hes the person i wanted to help me. Human Emotions are a source of wonder and im completely lacking in comprehension of them in any means. I did damage control this morning i think though. (hope so)
.. i think jesika shouldnt be allowed to have bottles of white wine.. or shots called "afterburns" or too many shiners in one night anymore. But.. yesterday did have a silver lining..we went to Cuba Libre for dinner first. Jerk Chicken Quesadillas are amazing.
i did a silly thing last night, drank too much... got too emotional.. and texted jake. he called me thursday night and we talked for a good 30 mins or so.. and it was nice catching up with him, i was genuinely happy for him.. new job,new major, just gettin stuff together. proud of him. it should have ended at that, but unfornately.. when u drink.. u get emotional.. and you let it go.. it doesnt. thank GOD i didnt call him.. just text messages. but they were pretty desperate messages.. I hope i have an "excuse".. family member dies..jake met him.. family member MENTIONS jake right before he dies.. im sad already.. i just added the topping to the emotion cake. " i just want something, i can never have" I guess i wanted him to comfort me. Hes the only friend that had ever met him and understood the full story behind everything. So hes the obvious choice of people to turn to but.. hes also the complicated one.. someone i dont know anymore, havent known for like a year.. but yet hes the person i wanted to help me. Human Emotions are a source of wonder and im completely lacking in comprehension of them in any means. I did damage control this morning i think though. (hope so)
.. i think jesika shouldnt be allowed to have bottles of white wine.. or shots called "afterburns" or too many shiners in one night anymore. But.. yesterday did have a silver lining..we went to Cuba Libre for dinner first. Jerk Chicken Quesadillas are amazing.