stresssssssssss
well a year ago yesterday my dad died...long story...if u ask i mite tell...but dnt feel sorry for me...feel sorry for my mom..i went to the lawyers office today to take action on the family fued that happend the day my dad died and now im starting the begging of a law suit on my dads side of the family..its a long slow tedious process and im proud of myself for taking on such a big responsibility...the only problem is...im a minor....so along with legal representation i have to find an adult to co represent me....this whole deal is really stressful....
along with the legal stress...i have at home stress....and this stress seems makes the whole social aspect of my life become limited... this social world i have grown into seems to be more interested in what lies within thier boundries rather than to explore...for example...i wanna go and do all these things and see different parts of the world..but i seem to always want to plan around "social events" like there more important than the oppurtunities i have ahead of me...i feel that i am trapped in this superficial rhelm that has hypmotized me to be as shallow as the public...as much as all people tend to be a little but shallow i find myself drowning in these shallow thoughts and actions..ive become a person who cares too much about the presentation of people...ive lost my good friends...and now i cant trust ne one because i dont kno who my friends are...i feel like im trapped in the stereotypical high school...with the really cool gurls and the kinda well known gurls..and the jocks..and all the clicks only im the one hwo bounces around trying to make these so called friends...and learning what i lost in order to make new friends is worth more that the friends i could make....
i dunno im just all around confused...some times i wish that fer 1 day everyone had to tell teh truth..and not sugarcoat thier lies...i wish i secretly knu what everyone was saying behind my back...or better yet i wish i could read peoples misnds....
<333sammy d
along with the legal stress...i have at home stress....and this stress seems makes the whole social aspect of my life become limited... this social world i have grown into seems to be more interested in what lies within thier boundries rather than to explore...for example...i wanna go and do all these things and see different parts of the world..but i seem to always want to plan around "social events" like there more important than the oppurtunities i have ahead of me...i feel that i am trapped in this superficial rhelm that has hypmotized me to be as shallow as the public...as much as all people tend to be a little but shallow i find myself drowning in these shallow thoughts and actions..ive become a person who cares too much about the presentation of people...ive lost my good friends...and now i cant trust ne one because i dont kno who my friends are...i feel like im trapped in the stereotypical high school...with the really cool gurls and the kinda well known gurls..and the jocks..and all the clicks only im the one hwo bounces around trying to make these so called friends...and learning what i lost in order to make new friends is worth more that the friends i could make....
i dunno im just all around confused...some times i wish that fer 1 day everyone had to tell teh truth..and not sugarcoat thier lies...i wish i secretly knu what everyone was saying behind my back...or better yet i wish i could read peoples misnds....
<333sammy d