its been awhile.
hey guys. i havent updated in forever. so i decided to. since im bored and have nothing else to do.
i will update you on my life as of right now.
so i had a dream last night that i got into a huge yelling argument with mrs. keenan outside of the band room during class and she punched me in the face because she couldnt fathom that i was right and she was wrong. i should have punched her back. but i didnt. i figured she would use her new attacking skills she learned to take me out. i just smiled after she punched me and then i walked back into the class smiling :) she told me to pack up my shit and leave. so i did. and i was happy to. haha.
i really wish that dream was true. seriously. i really want to stick up for myself for once and let her have it. not physically. verbally. oh yes. i want her to know once and for all what she puts me through and the effect she has on me as well as everyone else. i hate her so much.
for those who didnt know, next weekend Dec. 16th she had asked me to play the piano for 4 hours for 100-200 dollars at a company christmas party. she asked me to do this about two weeks ago. she needed to know if i would do it right away. so i told her the very next day that i would certainly do it. so she was like ok great i'll let the lady know. so i, being really excited about this, went out and bought all new christmas music. yesterday i asked her if she had talked to the lady and she said yes i called her last night and they said they dont need you anymore. and i was like WHAT?? and she was like .. well, what happened was they had called other people too and they wanted the first person to call them back, and i told them i was waiting for your answer. I TOLD HER LIKE 2 WEEKS AGO THAT I WOULD DO IT AND SHE WAITED UNTIL YESTERDAY TO CALL THE LADY BACK , AND SHE HAD THE NERVE TO TELL THEM THAT SHE WAS WAITING FOR MY ANSWER EVEN THOUGH SHE HAD MY ANSWER TWO WEEKS AGO!. i was soo pissed. you have no idea how badly i needed that money and how much i wanted to do it. besides, it makes me look bad because she blamed it on me. so now the company probably thinks that im too lazy to confirm if i would do it or not. i told mrs. keenan that i had bought all new music for it, and all she could say was "oh. im sorry" (very very very unapologetically). i am so upset. i hate her so much. she doesnt care at all. she does this all the time. she screwed me and a few others out of a free $500 scholarship last year too because she didnt turn in the applications on time and all she said was "sorry , maybe next year." yeah there is no next year for me and amanda and whoever else applied. thanks alot.
my mom is going to call mrs. keenan. and im going to email marciniak. and im also going to ask keenan for the phone number of the company so i can apologize for mrs. keenan and her stupidity and let them know that it wasnt my fault, and that i really wanted to do this.
so ugh. other than that.
things are going pretty well for the most part.
school is going well. grades are good. im busy right now with choir and band and i like it. im finally doing something instead of sitting on my butt. haha. now all i need is a job. i need one BAD!.
im getting really worried about my CMU audition for the music program. ive procrastinated to the point where now i have no shot. eek. the audition is in less than a month and i have nothing ready. i do not know my scales on the piano like...at all. i have no idea what song i will audition on. i dont know my clarinet scales in two-three octaves, and i dont have a song ready, or a song at all. yeah im screwed. its hard enough to get into the music program and i havent even started to prepare. theres asolutely no way i will get in now. :( i screwed myself. ouch. but im still going to that school anyways. so im hoping that if i dont get in to the music program, i will still be in the marching band and try to work my way up. i dont know what else to fall back on if i dont make it into the program. i have no other career interests. i used to want to be a 4th grade teacher, but i pretty much lost that ambition. i guess i will go with the flow and see where life takes me. most people change their career goals in college after their first or second years anyway. we'll see what happens. i dont want to give up my dreams this easily, but at this point, theres no way i will get into the music program this year. im not ready, and its my fault. :( i need to get going and get prepared.
wow this is long. if you are still with me, props to you.
hmm. theres a lot more i could right about but i wont bore you with my troubles. hehe. i could go on and on about my family problems, but i dont want to be a complainer. i would have to say that i am dealing with the cards that are dealt to me quite well. i wish i could say the same about my brother but i cant.
with each new thing thats added to my plate, i deal and move on. im trying to just forget about my dad. he's dead to me. i hate to say it, but the dad that i once knew is no longer. but again, i will not go into this. i dont need to go around telling everything to people. its my problem and i will deal like i have been. so. its all good. :)
Christmas is coming ! :)
that is all.
i will update you on my life as of right now.
so i had a dream last night that i got into a huge yelling argument with mrs. keenan outside of the band room during class and she punched me in the face because she couldnt fathom that i was right and she was wrong. i should have punched her back. but i didnt. i figured she would use her new attacking skills she learned to take me out. i just smiled after she punched me and then i walked back into the class smiling :) she told me to pack up my shit and leave. so i did. and i was happy to. haha.
i really wish that dream was true. seriously. i really want to stick up for myself for once and let her have it. not physically. verbally. oh yes. i want her to know once and for all what she puts me through and the effect she has on me as well as everyone else. i hate her so much.
for those who didnt know, next weekend Dec. 16th she had asked me to play the piano for 4 hours for 100-200 dollars at a company christmas party. she asked me to do this about two weeks ago. she needed to know if i would do it right away. so i told her the very next day that i would certainly do it. so she was like ok great i'll let the lady know. so i, being really excited about this, went out and bought all new christmas music. yesterday i asked her if she had talked to the lady and she said yes i called her last night and they said they dont need you anymore. and i was like WHAT?? and she was like .. well, what happened was they had called other people too and they wanted the first person to call them back, and i told them i was waiting for your answer. I TOLD HER LIKE 2 WEEKS AGO THAT I WOULD DO IT AND SHE WAITED UNTIL YESTERDAY TO CALL THE LADY BACK , AND SHE HAD THE NERVE TO TELL THEM THAT SHE WAS WAITING FOR MY ANSWER EVEN THOUGH SHE HAD MY ANSWER TWO WEEKS AGO!. i was soo pissed. you have no idea how badly i needed that money and how much i wanted to do it. besides, it makes me look bad because she blamed it on me. so now the company probably thinks that im too lazy to confirm if i would do it or not. i told mrs. keenan that i had bought all new music for it, and all she could say was "oh. im sorry" (very very very unapologetically). i am so upset. i hate her so much. she doesnt care at all. she does this all the time. she screwed me and a few others out of a free $500 scholarship last year too because she didnt turn in the applications on time and all she said was "sorry , maybe next year." yeah there is no next year for me and amanda and whoever else applied. thanks alot.
my mom is going to call mrs. keenan. and im going to email marciniak. and im also going to ask keenan for the phone number of the company so i can apologize for mrs. keenan and her stupidity and let them know that it wasnt my fault, and that i really wanted to do this.
so ugh. other than that.
things are going pretty well for the most part.
school is going well. grades are good. im busy right now with choir and band and i like it. im finally doing something instead of sitting on my butt. haha. now all i need is a job. i need one BAD!.
im getting really worried about my CMU audition for the music program. ive procrastinated to the point where now i have no shot. eek. the audition is in less than a month and i have nothing ready. i do not know my scales on the piano like...at all. i have no idea what song i will audition on. i dont know my clarinet scales in two-three octaves, and i dont have a song ready, or a song at all. yeah im screwed. its hard enough to get into the music program and i havent even started to prepare. theres asolutely no way i will get in now. :( i screwed myself. ouch. but im still going to that school anyways. so im hoping that if i dont get in to the music program, i will still be in the marching band and try to work my way up. i dont know what else to fall back on if i dont make it into the program. i have no other career interests. i used to want to be a 4th grade teacher, but i pretty much lost that ambition. i guess i will go with the flow and see where life takes me. most people change their career goals in college after their first or second years anyway. we'll see what happens. i dont want to give up my dreams this easily, but at this point, theres no way i will get into the music program this year. im not ready, and its my fault. :( i need to get going and get prepared.
wow this is long. if you are still with me, props to you.
hmm. theres a lot more i could right about but i wont bore you with my troubles. hehe. i could go on and on about my family problems, but i dont want to be a complainer. i would have to say that i am dealing with the cards that are dealt to me quite well. i wish i could say the same about my brother but i cant.
with each new thing thats added to my plate, i deal and move on. im trying to just forget about my dad. he's dead to me. i hate to say it, but the dad that i once knew is no longer. but again, i will not go into this. i dont need to go around telling everything to people. its my problem and i will deal like i have been. so. its all good. :)
Christmas is coming ! :)
that is all.