Rant: Proceed with caution
Two words: "Kill me".
Well I had to wake up at 7:30 this morning because I had to be in Bedford at 9. I left really early so that I would have enough time to get there, because I was scared to death that I would get lost. I couldn't find my way to the school in my head. Well I got there safe and sound, so you can all breathe now.
So I got there and went into the cafeteria, where the head of the day camp was. Like, no one else was there yet, so I just kinda stood in the middle of the cafe, looking around like a pathetic little lost soul. More kids came and grouped together in their cliques and whatnot that they'd already established. I felt like I had moved again, except this time I was in high school. I was the only new camp counselor this year, and from another town. Perfect.
Then we went to the "bomb shelter" where I spent probably a total of two hours out of my day. It's a friggin basement that isn't even finished. Half of the floor is like, dirt. It was dark and musty, and that's where all the crap was. First we moved tables, which were really heavy, and, of course, you basically had to find someone else to help you move one table. But see Jess, she has no partner! Yeah I did get a partner, but then she left after moving two friggin tables to set up her room or whatever. I moved like, just tables and chairs for an hour and a half. Then I started moving boxes places, basically following people who already knew what they were doing. I was the silent stalker. It sucked because I didn't know where basically anything was in that damned school.
We had some sort of a break and I talked to the head guy. He showed me my schedule. The way he was talking about it, he made it seem like I was working more than just Thursdays and Fridays. Hmm...
Then I moved more crap.
Then we had lunch. I brought mine like a cool kid. I went out to my car to eat it, because all the natives went gallavanting around their town. I would have gotten majorly lost if I roamed beyond my parking space, so I stayed. I called my mom. I couldn't hold up the cell phone. Bad. It was really lonely, but the radio was nice...
Then I went back inside and talked to the head guy again. I told him that the contract I got in the mail said I would be working Thursdays and Fridays, and he was like "whoah that's a mistake!". And now you know the root of my suffering. I am now working everyday, 9-3ish, in Bedford, with no friends. In one day I have lost my summer.
Moved the last of the crap. Then I actually got to go inside my music room and explore my things. I was thrilled. I have two keyboards, a friggin karaoke machine, two stereos, random CDs and tapes, costumes, rhythm instruments (dude, I have friggin claves), and just ... more than I thought. I was like a kid at Christmas opening up those boxes. Some other girl had the room last year, and she was telling me some of the things she had the kids do or whatever. Oh man, the coolest thing are these "boom sticks". They're colored tubes, but each one is designated a pitch. It goes like two octaves. I'm going to have fun with those...
Then the girl left, and I was alone again, but happier. I sorted the tapes and whatnot. It was peaceful. No one else was around me, but this time I liked it. Then it was 3 so I went back upstairs. The head guy was asking kids if they could stay till 5 (paid overtime). I left. I didn't have anything else to do. I wanted to go home.
Obviously found my way home--it wasn't that hard. I told my mom who told my dad about the fact that now I have to work everyday. My dad said I could always quit, considering the fact that I signed a false contract. I don't know what I should do. The money would be nice. Maybe I'll like the kids. It's good teaching experience. I'll probably make friends sometime. I don't have to haul anymore shit around. I won't be there to put everything away at the end of the 6 weeks because of FH camp. I have summer work to do. I have friends. I need someone to decide things for me :/
So now I'm here, and emotionally distressed. I'm not used to being a loner, and I don't like it at all. I need people.
I want to cry, but I don't want my eyes to get all puffy.