relief...finally...jst for today...
went out wit mi uncle, aunt, n lil cuzins....it was fun jst spendin time wit them...mayn landon got big n he's jst 3 months..haha..luv that lil boi.....my reason fer livin....im attached to him n he is to me...wierd...smart lil munky head..hahah...sigh*....let alot of stuff out....felt perty good....miss em sooOo much....but yea..nuthin i kan do rite now....they gave me a boost that i needed at the moment....sumfin to strive for... a baby cuzin growin up n lookin up to me....maynn....i jst needa stop cryin tho...try to but i kant..o wells...keep gettin more heart cramps n chest pains....eh...all the shit..all the cryin....beginin to feel it physicalli..not jst mentalli n emotionalli....fuck it...nuthin i kan do..im gettin sicker....i kan feel it...but o wells....let it b i guess...