Did You Know?
Did You Know? (1/1)
Pairing: baekyeol/chanbaek
Genre: Humor
Summary: Chanyeol is continuously spouting random facts that Baekhyun obviously don't care about, so in the end does Baekhyun find a way to shut him up?
What had he done? Oh dear, what on earth had he done?
That was only thought running through Baekhyun’s head as he pretended to listen to Chanyeol’s overly happy voice droning on and on about things no one really cared for-well, Baekhyun didn’t care, but maybe some people did. Like Chanyeol.
Baekhyun wanted to do nothing more than rip his ears off after the first hour and a half of Chanyeol’s constant jabber.
“Did you know that cats have more than a hundred vocal cord sounds whereas dogs only have ten?”
Interesting. Really, Baekhyun tried to convince himself.
“Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our ears and nose never stop growing.”
“Did you know babies are born without kneecaps? They don’t appear until their second to sixth year of age.”
“Banging your head against the wall burns one hundred and fifty calories an hour.”
On and on, it didn’t stop. Baekhyun’s eye twitched when he looked at the clock.
3:25
“Did you know that only humans, chimps, and dolphins have sex for pleasure? It’s truly amazing.”
“The strongest muscle in the human body is the tongue.”
Really now…that’s…yeah…Keep it together, Baekhyun…
“Did you know that a pig’s orgasm lasts for thirty minutes? I mean, I wish my orgasms could last that long…”
What the-? Oh my god…
“An ant always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.”
“The shortest war in history was between Zanzibar and England in nineteen ninety-six. Zanzibar surrendered after thirty eight minutes!”
….That is some beautiful rain outside…
“Marilyn Monroe had six toes.”
Lovely.
“If you keep a goldfish in a dark room for a long time it will eventually turn white.”
“Adolf Hitler’s mother seriously considered abortion, but was talked out of it by her doctor.”
…..So many things I want to say to that one. The mother had the best option in mind.
“On average, a human being will have sex more than three-thousand times and spent two weeks kissing in their lifetime.”
Shall I put an end to this now?
“Having sex once a week can help improve your immune function by thirty percent.”
“Well, in that case,” Baekhyun cut in, grabbed Chanyeol’s arm and practically dragging him to their shared room, “Let’s have sex. I’m bored.”
“I was hoping we could do something like this,” Chanyeol laughed, allowing himself to be pushed down onto the bed.
“Hey, did you know…?” Chanyeol started, holding Baekhyun close in his arms, the both of them slight panting and sweating.
“I swear, if it’s another one of you stupid facts, I’ll punch you,” Baekhyun grumbled.
“Did you know I love you?” Chanyeol asked smiling, laying a sweet kiss on the top of his partner’s head.
Baekhyun felt his cheeks heat up, but didn’t say anything in return. He knew Chanyeol knew the answer. He most certainly did, and Baekhyun loved him back.
“Also, did you know that cats can sleep up to sixteen to eighteen hours a day?”
“Dammit, Chanyeol!”
“Ow! Don’t hit me!”
Pairing: baekyeol/chanbaek
Genre: Humor
Summary: Chanyeol is continuously spouting random facts that Baekhyun obviously don't care about, so in the end does Baekhyun find a way to shut him up?
What had he done? Oh dear, what on earth had he done?
That was only thought running through Baekhyun’s head as he pretended to listen to Chanyeol’s overly happy voice droning on and on about things no one really cared for-well, Baekhyun didn’t care, but maybe some people did. Like Chanyeol.
Baekhyun wanted to do nothing more than rip his ears off after the first hour and a half of Chanyeol’s constant jabber.
“Did you know that cats have more than a hundred vocal cord sounds whereas dogs only have ten?”
Interesting. Really, Baekhyun tried to convince himself.
“Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our ears and nose never stop growing.”
“Did you know babies are born without kneecaps? They don’t appear until their second to sixth year of age.”
“Banging your head against the wall burns one hundred and fifty calories an hour.”
On and on, it didn’t stop. Baekhyun’s eye twitched when he looked at the clock.
3:25
“Did you know that only humans, chimps, and dolphins have sex for pleasure? It’s truly amazing.”
“The strongest muscle in the human body is the tongue.”
Really now…that’s…yeah…Keep it together, Baekhyun…
“Did you know that a pig’s orgasm lasts for thirty minutes? I mean, I wish my orgasms could last that long…”
What the-? Oh my god…
“An ant always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.”
“The shortest war in history was between Zanzibar and England in nineteen ninety-six. Zanzibar surrendered after thirty eight minutes!”
….That is some beautiful rain outside…
“Marilyn Monroe had six toes.”
Lovely.
“If you keep a goldfish in a dark room for a long time it will eventually turn white.”
“Adolf Hitler’s mother seriously considered abortion, but was talked out of it by her doctor.”
…..So many things I want to say to that one. The mother had the best option in mind.
“On average, a human being will have sex more than three-thousand times and spent two weeks kissing in their lifetime.”
Shall I put an end to this now?
“Having sex once a week can help improve your immune function by thirty percent.”
“Well, in that case,” Baekhyun cut in, grabbed Chanyeol’s arm and practically dragging him to their shared room, “Let’s have sex. I’m bored.”
“I was hoping we could do something like this,” Chanyeol laughed, allowing himself to be pushed down onto the bed.
“Hey, did you know…?” Chanyeol started, holding Baekhyun close in his arms, the both of them slight panting and sweating.
“I swear, if it’s another one of you stupid facts, I’ll punch you,” Baekhyun grumbled.
“Did you know I love you?” Chanyeol asked smiling, laying a sweet kiss on the top of his partner’s head.
Baekhyun felt his cheeks heat up, but didn’t say anything in return. He knew Chanyeol knew the answer. He most certainly did, and Baekhyun loved him back.
“Also, did you know that cats can sleep up to sixteen to eighteen hours a day?”
“Dammit, Chanyeol!”
“Ow! Don’t hit me!”