Take the photograph, it will be the last.

[xnever_lovedx]

Today is a very sad day. even though i dont know why. i had a good friday a horrible then good then bad saturday. and im just sad today. someone said something that really got to me yesterday. people only came to see me so they could use my things. and idk im feeling very unliked and very unwanted right now. and i wish that i didnt have some of these thoughts going threw my head. bcz they hurt. i hate being compared to someone. even tho nothing of comparason was said.. i compare myself when i hear better things said about someone else then me. shes hot and im pretty. i dk.. i think im over reacting but im sick of everyone tihnking she is prettier then me.. she already stole one from me.. please dont make it become 2. i wish i was pretty enough for you but im not.. cant you just accept it and give me a chance? i thought we had fun but maybe you were just being nice to me. idk.. i think you might read my journal but im not sure. you did yesteday but do you actually read what i write and do you know that some of the things.. are aimed at you? i dont think people realize how much they mean to me.. just bcz i dont i love you doesnt mean i dont. i just dont like saying those words to people sometimes. after i say them i usually get hurt really bad. so i try not to say them. its not u its my insecurities. and yesterday i didnt wanna ask but if you read this you will know my ? and that was were those answeres you put in my journal quizes the truth or just you trying to make me feel like i have a chance... and do i have a chance or should i forget it? i need to know. i dont wanna dwell on something that is never going to happen and thats how i feel right now. and i dont like it. you love her and im not saying who you are or who she is.. but you love her and not me and i dont think you ever will.. and im feeling really hurt and lonley and sad right now. i think i might go watch the notebook bcz even tho i dont usually cry during movies.. i am so sad right now i need to and maybe that will help... but who knows... if you know that im talking to ou and you do read this.. comment me something.. weather its a note of comfort that i just need to be patient or the truth that i fear i know already. thats about all i feel like writing.. so ill be around.. i love you.. but you love her.

*Natalie*