Reasons to Date a Hufflepuff Ch. 1: A Plan Is Formed [Teddy/Lorcan]
Fic Title: Reasons to Date a Hufflepuff, and How to Do It
Chapter Number and Title: Chapter I: A Plan Is Formed (Or, The Remarkable Power of a Winningly Seductive Smile)
Ship: Teddy/Lorcan
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Somewhat cracky, extremely fluffy.
Wordcount: 2998 words, this chapter
Summary: Lorcan can think of lots of good reasons to get a Hufflepuff boyfriend (mainly, the Puff common room is actually warm).
Chapter I: A Plan Is Formed (Or, The Remarkable Power of a Winningly Seductive Smile)
Lorcan
Lorcan was having an unpleasant day. His cauldron had exploded in potions, Lysander had come moaning to him about falling out with his latest girlfriend, and then Lorcan had been caught trying to hex said girlfriend silly in a third floor corridor.
Well, the last one was entirely deserved -- both for breaking school rules and for being the sort of person who tries to hex a girl (albeit a Weasley) -- but nevertheless, one wasn't supposed to get caught when dishing out retribution. Detention wasn't badass at all.
And now, having finished that detention, Lorcan trudged down towards the dungeons at some ungodly hour of the night, far after hours. Slytherin was clearly the superior house, but Lorcan hated the dungeons. They were cold and damp and not cunning at all -- a cunning location for a dormitory would be somewhere in the warm and away from drafts. One thing could be said for Hufflepuffs: they were able to light fires that weren't put out instantly by water dripping down from the Lake.
Actually, Lorcan considered as he whispered the Slytherin password, there was quite a lot to be said for the Hufflepuff common room. He remembered it from a party he had crashed there last Christmas. It was warm, comfortably furnished (in contrast to the hard, high-backed leather chairs in Slytherin), and near enough to the kitchen to be perfumed by a subtle scent of treacle tarts and roast pork.
The party had been terrible, though -- primarily involving Muggle boardgames (and nothing as interesting as strip Twister), and a very strange game of Truth or Dare where no one was drunk and no one kissed anyone else. When one sixth year had confessed that he was bisexual, everyone had nodded and said that it must be difficult to be an opressed minority, and that he was admirable for having pride.
Yes, Hufflepuffs were very strange. Lorcan certainly wouldn't want to be one. But ... he supposed he could date one. A Hufflepuff boyfriend. Then he could spend his nights in Hufflepuff but retreat to Slytherin when he tired of boardgames.
The idea of a Hufflepuff boyfriend was actually sounding rather attractive. Puffs were supposed to be loyal, weren't they? Lorcan's few flings had been just that -- flings. Perhaps it was time to settle down, now that he was a wise and mature sixteen year old. Yes, if Lorcan wanted to settle down, a Hufflepuff would certainly be his first choice -- and they were a fairly attractive lot, in an innocent, cupidic way.
And it couldn't be difficult to seduce a Hufflepuff. They were sentimental and spineless, and would probably melt into his strong arms at a gift of chocolate and roses.
But who? Lorcan wished he could remember the name of the gay sixth year -- seventh year, now -- from the Truth or Dare game. Lilac, wasn't it? Eddie Lilac? No, that wasn't quite right ...
Lupin! That was it. Teddy Lupin. Head boy, now. That might make it a bit difficult; he would probably try to be responsible. Still, Lupin was good looking enough to be worth the effort, and Lorcan knew that he himself was good looking enough for anyone.
Lorcan reached his dormitory and fell into bed with a sigh. Tomorrow he would start seducing Teddy Lupin.
Teddy
The last few years of Teddy's life had gone quite well. He had been made prefect, then head boy, had confessed that he was bisexual during a Truth or Dare game and been met with nothing but tolerance, had achieved all O's and E's on his owls, and he was sure that he would die a virgin.
Not that chastity was necessarily a bad thing. In Hufflepuff, it was considered virtuous. But, really, only in Hufflepuff. Gryffindor and Slytherin were reknowned for their promiscuity, and even Ravenclaws regularly met for midnight rendezvous, despite being the type of people who actually used the word 'rendezvous'.
It wasn't that Teddy was all that fussed about sex -- although he would like to try it, at least once in his life. But he would really like some sort of a relationship. He was a Hufflepuff, after all; he had needs. A Hufflepuff is not a Hufflepuff without someone to cuddle with, preferably while drinking hot chocolate by the fire.
Teddy was not entirely sure how it had come to pass that he was nearly 18 and had yet to amass more romantic experience than one fumbling (and extremely awkward) kiss with Miriam Lawrence when they were fifteen.
Since recieving his OWL results he supposed he could no longer deny that he was smart (although he had a sneaking suspicion that he only had book smarts). He knew he wasn't particularly good-looking, but he had the power to be the most handsome man in the world and he chose not to use it. Modesty was an attractive characteristic, wasn't it?
And lots of people liked him, certainly. He had many friends.
Teddy sighed, and flip-flopped back and forth between studying Transfiguration and trying to work out what was wrong with him.
Lorcan
It is remarkably difficult to seduce, or even to befriend, a seventh year. Despite being only a year apart, sixth and seventh years exist in galaxies that only pass each other once in a billion years. Seventh years naturally see everyone below them as children, and will quickly shake off anyone who tries to get into their social circle without a really good excuse.
Lorcan started by looking at the list of clubs. Good luck there -- Lupin was in two. Charms Club and the Super Fun Wednesday Potions Study Group ... damn. Charms was full, and Lorcan was reknownedly pants at potions.
But ... potions! That was it! Lupin was as much a potions whizz as Lorcan was a potions dunce. He could approach Lupin, say that he was thinking of becoming a healer or an auror (that would make him seem noble) but was in danger of failing potions, but "I've heard you're very good at potions, and I thought perhaps you could tutor me?" All, of course, with a winningly seductive smile.
So here he was now, waiting a short distance along a corridor from the Charms classroom. In two minutes Lupin would come out of Charms, and Lorcan would have six minutes to grab him and talk to him before Lupin had to go to Transfiguration. He had it all planned.
The classroom door opened, and a rush of bodies came out. It wasn't difficult to spot Lupin -- he was ridiculously tall, and the last to leave the classroom.
Lorcan stepped out of the shadows just behind him, and touched him lightly on the small of the back. "Lupin?"
Teddy turned, and Lorcan's breath caught in his throat. Lupin was strikingly good looking. He had high cheekbones and a strong, noble nose and chin, but still managed to have a soft androgyny to his features. Lorcan had never payed Teddy Lupin much attention. Despite being the orphaned son of two great war heroes and a Metamorphmagus to boot (though he rarely let his powers surface), Lupin had managed to fade into the background of Hogwarts, although he always made an effort to know everyone's name.
"Lysander Scamander, isn't it?" Lupin paused, and appeared to notice the Slytherin tie. "Lorcan. I'm sorry."
"It's not hard to tell us apart. I'm the devilishly handsome one," Lorcan quipped, and quickly regretted it. Arrogance would surely put off a Hufflepuff.
Lupin did not seem to mind, however. He gave a little laugh that bubbled up like Felix Felicis -- that's right, potions!
"I'm thinking of becoming an eeler or a horror --" Lorcan paused and took a deep breath "-- that is, a healer or an auror, but I'm ... well, I'm really rather terrible at potions but I've heard that you're, well, a bit of a genius so I ... I wondered if you could tutor me? Sometime?"
As he spoke, Lorcan grew more and more horrified with himself. He wasn't speaking, his tongue was flopping around in his mouth like a beached manatee. He gave Lupin his best winningly seductive smile, hoping that would make up for his inelegance.
Lupin smiled in response, and Lorcan was pretty sure that his heart shouldn't be doing this. Slytherin hearts were made of ice bound in iron, and it took a lot of warmth to melt iron.
"I'm a bit busy," Lupin began, and Lorcan felt his melted heart begin to sink. "But ... sure, why not. How about tomorrow, after classes? I can get Professor Zabini to let us use the potions classroom, so there's no need to bring any supplies."
"Excellent," Lorcan exhaled, relief buoying his heart up again. "I look forward to it."
"Cool," Lupin replied, and his smile before walking away made Lorcan wonder, fleetingly, who was seducing who.
Teddy
Teddy determinedly refrained from thinking about the encounter until after Transfiguration. He couldn't allow his grades to slip just because his heart seemed to be going at two hundred beats a minute.
Although he knew that their mother was a friend of Harry and Ginny, and had met her several times when he was very young, he had never been acquainted with the Scamander twins. Luna traveled constantly, and apparently both twins had been raised almost completely by their father.
Teddy's vague memories of Luna brought up a small woman with dark blonde hair, a distant expression, and enormous pale eyes. Teddy had met Lysander before, and he seemed pretty much like his mother -- blonde, blue-eyed, and sweet tempered (if worryingly observant). . Nothing could have prepared him for Lorcan's appearance.
Lorcan was short, but broad-shouldered. He had coarse, dark hair -- a stark contrast to his brother's -- and although his eyes were large an blue, his expression was anything but far-off. He kept his eyes shrewdly narrowed, almost half-closed.
But the most remarkable thing about Lorcan Scamander was his poise. He seemed to be as much an elegant gentleman as any sixteen year old could be. And something about the Slytherin's smile -- such a simple, commonplace gesture in others -- made Teddy have to take deep breaths to calm himself down.
Teddy couldn't get that smile out of his head, and it was driving him mad.
Lorcan
After his last class the next day, Lorcan dashed back to his dormitory. He hurriedly re-brushed his teeth and straightened his robes. As an afterthought, he brushed his hair until it gleamed like darkest obsidian, and applied a bit of the lavendar-lime cologne that had been his birthday present to himself. He loved that cologne. It was masculine and elegant, but very, very gay.
Satisfied that he lived up to his reputation as a handsome devil, Lorcan proceeded through the quiet dungeon to the potions classroom, doing his best not to run all the way there. This would never do. He had clearly been single for too long (a month now, was it?), if he wanted to melt into the strong arms of the first handsome man he had a chance with. Lupin was supposed to melt into his arms. If he remembered that, then he would be fine.
The potions classroom door was slightly ajar. Lorcan paused to check his hair in a hand mirror that he carried in his pocket, before pushing the door open. "Lupin?"
The Hufflepuff emerged from the supply closet, carrying a cauldron, a sixth year potions textbook, and an armful of ingredients. "Call me Teddy."
Oh, first name basis! This was definitely a good start. Lorcan gave another winning smile. "Where do we start?"
"I was just about to ask you that," Teddy said, setting his burden down on one of the high tables. "Are there specific things you're having trouble with, or are you ... just generally pants at everything?"
"I'm pants at everything. I barely passed the OWL," Lorcan replied immediately, and coughed, attempting to regain his composure. "That is to say, I feel that I could benefit from a general review of the entirety of last year's curriculum."
"Right. Wow, okay," Teddy said. "I guess this'll take more than a day, then."
Lorcan's heart soared. "I suppose so, yes."
"Well," Teddy said, "why don't we start with antidotes ..."
The rest of the evening passed quickly and happily. Lorcan found himself getting along famously with Teddy, despite his tutor being a Puff. He brushed his hand against Teddy's as much as possible while chopping up asphodel root, and Teddy had not once moved away. And as an added benefit, Lorcan actually felt like he might be able to make it through potions the next day without having to write home for a new cauldron.
Teddy glanced at the clock as they finished the Veritaserum antidote. "We should be getting to dinner. This was fun," he added. "You're not really that bad at potions."
Lorcan smiled winningly. "Shall we do this again on ... Friday?" He wanted to say 'tomorrow', but he shouldn't sound too desparate. Two days would be just enough to, hopefully, make Teddy feel desperate.
"Sure," Teddy grinned. The sleeves of his robes were rolled up and his hair was falling into his eyes -- Lorcan had a sickeningly sentimental and decidedly un-Slytherin urge to reach up and brush it off his forehead ...
"I'll see you on Thursday, then," Lorcan said quickly, moving towards the door. "Thank you!"
Lorcan dashed back to his dormitory, and discussed the philosophical implications and consequences of memory charms with Hieronymus Parkinson until the feeling went away.
***
Lorcan had no idea if Teddy was feeling desperate yet, but he knew that he was. The last two days had been torture, and most of Friday had been occupied by planning exactly how he would progress in his seduction.
Now, finally, the time had come to meet Teddy. Lorcan, having completed his beauty routine, knocked sharply on the potions classroom door. Teddy opened it. Lorcan noticed that the seventh year was barefoot, and wondered why he found that attractive.
"Take off your shoes," Teddy commanded. His voice sounded strange and husky, and combined with Teddy's slow grin, it sent a shiver down Lorcan's spine.
Lorcan regained his composure. "I'd rather not. The floor is perpetually freezing here in the dungeons."
"No, it's warm!"
Lorcan raised one eyebrow -- a gesture that he had perfected at the age of seven.
"I was working on my own potions work, before you got here," Teddy explained. "It's this warming potion that can spread out across flat surfaces. So if you put down just a drop, pretty soon the whole floor will be warm."
"Oh," Lorcan said, and sat down at one of the tables to take his shoes off, before dropping back to his feet. As his feet met the floor, it was pure bliss. He allowed himself to smile as the warmth spread up through the soles of his feet, all the way to his brain.
"Great, isn't it?" Teddy asked him.
"Fantastic," Lorcan replied fervently, and shuffled over to one of the tables, where two cauldrons were resting. One was red-orange and seemed to glow with heat -- like a radiator, he recalled from Muggle Studies. That must be the warming potion. The other one was Hufflepuff yellow, like sunshine on buttercups.
"What this?" Lorcan pointed to the yellow potion.
Teddy padded over, grinning with every step on the warm surface. "Oh, that's Pleasance. It's a bit like a Cheering Charm, but less of a giddy happiness and more ... peaceful."
"I didn't know Hufflepuffs did drugs."
Teddy looked defensive. "It's not a drug."
"It sounds like a drug to me."
"Well, alright ... but I had to test it, to make sure I brewed it right."
"If you say so," Lorcan smirked, but avoided irritating Teddy. He was rather irritated himself, though -- now he couldn't make a move, as he would be taking advantage. If he was wooing a Slytherin that would be a turn-on, but he doubted that it would impress a Puff.
Although ... if he took some himself, it would be fair, right? He tried to resist the sly grin that he knew was spreading across his face. "Shouldn't you let me test it as well? To be sure?"
Teddy's Pleasance-induced grin faded. "I most certainly should not," he said. "I'm head boy. I can't go around giving drugs to ... to children!"
Lorcan felt his heart drop. "I'm sixteen," he said, doing his best to keep his voice calm and mature.
"You're still underage."
"Oh, come on," Lorcan whined, wishing that Hufflepuffs were less bloody noble and more like regular people. "It won't be fair if it's only you. And in any case, I'm a Slytherin. They can't possibly blame you, Hufflepuff, Head Boy and future saint, for my actions."
Teddy frowned. "I think it's pretty much worn off me anyway," he said shortly.
Damn it! This could very well have ruined everything. Teddy was sitting down now, spreading supplies out on a table, and Lorcan knew he had just missed a perfect chance.
Still ... he could try to patch things up. He sat down next to Teddy, dangerously close on the bench, and leaned closer. Lorcan knew that he smelled masculine, elegant, and very, very gay -- the cologne again. Teddy, however, smelled like woodfires and potions ingredients. Lorcan allowed himself to inhale deeply before speaking.
"I'm sorry," Lorcan said softly. "I shouldn't have --"
"No, I shouldn't have snapped at you," Teddy interrupted him. "Merlin, let's just make some potions, alright?"
"Yes," Lorcan said, with a winningly seductive smile. "How about love potions? I've always wanted to try brewing Amortentia."
"... Let's do poisons."
Lorcan smiled and agreed. Still, eventually they would have to get around to love potions -- and if all went well, by that time Teddy's Amortentia would smell like Lorcan.
Chapter II
Chapter Number and Title: Chapter I: A Plan Is Formed (Or, The Remarkable Power of a Winningly Seductive Smile)
Ship: Teddy/Lorcan
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Somewhat cracky, extremely fluffy.
Wordcount: 2998 words, this chapter
Summary: Lorcan can think of lots of good reasons to get a Hufflepuff boyfriend (mainly, the Puff common room is actually warm).
Chapter I: A Plan Is Formed (Or, The Remarkable Power of a Winningly Seductive Smile)
Lorcan
Lorcan was having an unpleasant day. His cauldron had exploded in potions, Lysander had come moaning to him about falling out with his latest girlfriend, and then Lorcan had been caught trying to hex said girlfriend silly in a third floor corridor.
Well, the last one was entirely deserved -- both for breaking school rules and for being the sort of person who tries to hex a girl (albeit a Weasley) -- but nevertheless, one wasn't supposed to get caught when dishing out retribution. Detention wasn't badass at all.
And now, having finished that detention, Lorcan trudged down towards the dungeons at some ungodly hour of the night, far after hours. Slytherin was clearly the superior house, but Lorcan hated the dungeons. They were cold and damp and not cunning at all -- a cunning location for a dormitory would be somewhere in the warm and away from drafts. One thing could be said for Hufflepuffs: they were able to light fires that weren't put out instantly by water dripping down from the Lake.
Actually, Lorcan considered as he whispered the Slytherin password, there was quite a lot to be said for the Hufflepuff common room. He remembered it from a party he had crashed there last Christmas. It was warm, comfortably furnished (in contrast to the hard, high-backed leather chairs in Slytherin), and near enough to the kitchen to be perfumed by a subtle scent of treacle tarts and roast pork.
The party had been terrible, though -- primarily involving Muggle boardgames (and nothing as interesting as strip Twister), and a very strange game of Truth or Dare where no one was drunk and no one kissed anyone else. When one sixth year had confessed that he was bisexual, everyone had nodded and said that it must be difficult to be an opressed minority, and that he was admirable for having pride.
Yes, Hufflepuffs were very strange. Lorcan certainly wouldn't want to be one. But ... he supposed he could date one. A Hufflepuff boyfriend. Then he could spend his nights in Hufflepuff but retreat to Slytherin when he tired of boardgames.
The idea of a Hufflepuff boyfriend was actually sounding rather attractive. Puffs were supposed to be loyal, weren't they? Lorcan's few flings had been just that -- flings. Perhaps it was time to settle down, now that he was a wise and mature sixteen year old. Yes, if Lorcan wanted to settle down, a Hufflepuff would certainly be his first choice -- and they were a fairly attractive lot, in an innocent, cupidic way.
And it couldn't be difficult to seduce a Hufflepuff. They were sentimental and spineless, and would probably melt into his strong arms at a gift of chocolate and roses.
But who? Lorcan wished he could remember the name of the gay sixth year -- seventh year, now -- from the Truth or Dare game. Lilac, wasn't it? Eddie Lilac? No, that wasn't quite right ...
Lupin! That was it. Teddy Lupin. Head boy, now. That might make it a bit difficult; he would probably try to be responsible. Still, Lupin was good looking enough to be worth the effort, and Lorcan knew that he himself was good looking enough for anyone.
Lorcan reached his dormitory and fell into bed with a sigh. Tomorrow he would start seducing Teddy Lupin.
Teddy
The last few years of Teddy's life had gone quite well. He had been made prefect, then head boy, had confessed that he was bisexual during a Truth or Dare game and been met with nothing but tolerance, had achieved all O's and E's on his owls, and he was sure that he would die a virgin.
Not that chastity was necessarily a bad thing. In Hufflepuff, it was considered virtuous. But, really, only in Hufflepuff. Gryffindor and Slytherin were reknowned for their promiscuity, and even Ravenclaws regularly met for midnight rendezvous, despite being the type of people who actually used the word 'rendezvous'.
It wasn't that Teddy was all that fussed about sex -- although he would like to try it, at least once in his life. But he would really like some sort of a relationship. He was a Hufflepuff, after all; he had needs. A Hufflepuff is not a Hufflepuff without someone to cuddle with, preferably while drinking hot chocolate by the fire.
Teddy was not entirely sure how it had come to pass that he was nearly 18 and had yet to amass more romantic experience than one fumbling (and extremely awkward) kiss with Miriam Lawrence when they were fifteen.
Since recieving his OWL results he supposed he could no longer deny that he was smart (although he had a sneaking suspicion that he only had book smarts). He knew he wasn't particularly good-looking, but he had the power to be the most handsome man in the world and he chose not to use it. Modesty was an attractive characteristic, wasn't it?
And lots of people liked him, certainly. He had many friends.
Teddy sighed, and flip-flopped back and forth between studying Transfiguration and trying to work out what was wrong with him.
Lorcan
It is remarkably difficult to seduce, or even to befriend, a seventh year. Despite being only a year apart, sixth and seventh years exist in galaxies that only pass each other once in a billion years. Seventh years naturally see everyone below them as children, and will quickly shake off anyone who tries to get into their social circle without a really good excuse.
Lorcan started by looking at the list of clubs. Good luck there -- Lupin was in two. Charms Club and the Super Fun Wednesday Potions Study Group ... damn. Charms was full, and Lorcan was reknownedly pants at potions.
But ... potions! That was it! Lupin was as much a potions whizz as Lorcan was a potions dunce. He could approach Lupin, say that he was thinking of becoming a healer or an auror (that would make him seem noble) but was in danger of failing potions, but "I've heard you're very good at potions, and I thought perhaps you could tutor me?" All, of course, with a winningly seductive smile.
So here he was now, waiting a short distance along a corridor from the Charms classroom. In two minutes Lupin would come out of Charms, and Lorcan would have six minutes to grab him and talk to him before Lupin had to go to Transfiguration. He had it all planned.
The classroom door opened, and a rush of bodies came out. It wasn't difficult to spot Lupin -- he was ridiculously tall, and the last to leave the classroom.
Lorcan stepped out of the shadows just behind him, and touched him lightly on the small of the back. "Lupin?"
Teddy turned, and Lorcan's breath caught in his throat. Lupin was strikingly good looking. He had high cheekbones and a strong, noble nose and chin, but still managed to have a soft androgyny to his features. Lorcan had never payed Teddy Lupin much attention. Despite being the orphaned son of two great war heroes and a Metamorphmagus to boot (though he rarely let his powers surface), Lupin had managed to fade into the background of Hogwarts, although he always made an effort to know everyone's name.
"Lysander Scamander, isn't it?" Lupin paused, and appeared to notice the Slytherin tie. "Lorcan. I'm sorry."
"It's not hard to tell us apart. I'm the devilishly handsome one," Lorcan quipped, and quickly regretted it. Arrogance would surely put off a Hufflepuff.
Lupin did not seem to mind, however. He gave a little laugh that bubbled up like Felix Felicis -- that's right, potions!
"I'm thinking of becoming an eeler or a horror --" Lorcan paused and took a deep breath "-- that is, a healer or an auror, but I'm ... well, I'm really rather terrible at potions but I've heard that you're, well, a bit of a genius so I ... I wondered if you could tutor me? Sometime?"
As he spoke, Lorcan grew more and more horrified with himself. He wasn't speaking, his tongue was flopping around in his mouth like a beached manatee. He gave Lupin his best winningly seductive smile, hoping that would make up for his inelegance.
Lupin smiled in response, and Lorcan was pretty sure that his heart shouldn't be doing this. Slytherin hearts were made of ice bound in iron, and it took a lot of warmth to melt iron.
"I'm a bit busy," Lupin began, and Lorcan felt his melted heart begin to sink. "But ... sure, why not. How about tomorrow, after classes? I can get Professor Zabini to let us use the potions classroom, so there's no need to bring any supplies."
"Excellent," Lorcan exhaled, relief buoying his heart up again. "I look forward to it."
"Cool," Lupin replied, and his smile before walking away made Lorcan wonder, fleetingly, who was seducing who.
Teddy
Teddy determinedly refrained from thinking about the encounter until after Transfiguration. He couldn't allow his grades to slip just because his heart seemed to be going at two hundred beats a minute.
Although he knew that their mother was a friend of Harry and Ginny, and had met her several times when he was very young, he had never been acquainted with the Scamander twins. Luna traveled constantly, and apparently both twins had been raised almost completely by their father.
Teddy's vague memories of Luna brought up a small woman with dark blonde hair, a distant expression, and enormous pale eyes. Teddy had met Lysander before, and he seemed pretty much like his mother -- blonde, blue-eyed, and sweet tempered (if worryingly observant). . Nothing could have prepared him for Lorcan's appearance.
Lorcan was short, but broad-shouldered. He had coarse, dark hair -- a stark contrast to his brother's -- and although his eyes were large an blue, his expression was anything but far-off. He kept his eyes shrewdly narrowed, almost half-closed.
But the most remarkable thing about Lorcan Scamander was his poise. He seemed to be as much an elegant gentleman as any sixteen year old could be. And something about the Slytherin's smile -- such a simple, commonplace gesture in others -- made Teddy have to take deep breaths to calm himself down.
Teddy couldn't get that smile out of his head, and it was driving him mad.
Lorcan
After his last class the next day, Lorcan dashed back to his dormitory. He hurriedly re-brushed his teeth and straightened his robes. As an afterthought, he brushed his hair until it gleamed like darkest obsidian, and applied a bit of the lavendar-lime cologne that had been his birthday present to himself. He loved that cologne. It was masculine and elegant, but very, very gay.
Satisfied that he lived up to his reputation as a handsome devil, Lorcan proceeded through the quiet dungeon to the potions classroom, doing his best not to run all the way there. This would never do. He had clearly been single for too long (a month now, was it?), if he wanted to melt into the strong arms of the first handsome man he had a chance with. Lupin was supposed to melt into his arms. If he remembered that, then he would be fine.
The potions classroom door was slightly ajar. Lorcan paused to check his hair in a hand mirror that he carried in his pocket, before pushing the door open. "Lupin?"
The Hufflepuff emerged from the supply closet, carrying a cauldron, a sixth year potions textbook, and an armful of ingredients. "Call me Teddy."
Oh, first name basis! This was definitely a good start. Lorcan gave another winning smile. "Where do we start?"
"I was just about to ask you that," Teddy said, setting his burden down on one of the high tables. "Are there specific things you're having trouble with, or are you ... just generally pants at everything?"
"I'm pants at everything. I barely passed the OWL," Lorcan replied immediately, and coughed, attempting to regain his composure. "That is to say, I feel that I could benefit from a general review of the entirety of last year's curriculum."
"Right. Wow, okay," Teddy said. "I guess this'll take more than a day, then."
Lorcan's heart soared. "I suppose so, yes."
"Well," Teddy said, "why don't we start with antidotes ..."
The rest of the evening passed quickly and happily. Lorcan found himself getting along famously with Teddy, despite his tutor being a Puff. He brushed his hand against Teddy's as much as possible while chopping up asphodel root, and Teddy had not once moved away. And as an added benefit, Lorcan actually felt like he might be able to make it through potions the next day without having to write home for a new cauldron.
Teddy glanced at the clock as they finished the Veritaserum antidote. "We should be getting to dinner. This was fun," he added. "You're not really that bad at potions."
Lorcan smiled winningly. "Shall we do this again on ... Friday?" He wanted to say 'tomorrow', but he shouldn't sound too desparate. Two days would be just enough to, hopefully, make Teddy feel desperate.
"Sure," Teddy grinned. The sleeves of his robes were rolled up and his hair was falling into his eyes -- Lorcan had a sickeningly sentimental and decidedly un-Slytherin urge to reach up and brush it off his forehead ...
"I'll see you on Thursday, then," Lorcan said quickly, moving towards the door. "Thank you!"
Lorcan dashed back to his dormitory, and discussed the philosophical implications and consequences of memory charms with Hieronymus Parkinson until the feeling went away.
***
Lorcan had no idea if Teddy was feeling desperate yet, but he knew that he was. The last two days had been torture, and most of Friday had been occupied by planning exactly how he would progress in his seduction.
Now, finally, the time had come to meet Teddy. Lorcan, having completed his beauty routine, knocked sharply on the potions classroom door. Teddy opened it. Lorcan noticed that the seventh year was barefoot, and wondered why he found that attractive.
"Take off your shoes," Teddy commanded. His voice sounded strange and husky, and combined with Teddy's slow grin, it sent a shiver down Lorcan's spine.
Lorcan regained his composure. "I'd rather not. The floor is perpetually freezing here in the dungeons."
"No, it's warm!"
Lorcan raised one eyebrow -- a gesture that he had perfected at the age of seven.
"I was working on my own potions work, before you got here," Teddy explained. "It's this warming potion that can spread out across flat surfaces. So if you put down just a drop, pretty soon the whole floor will be warm."
"Oh," Lorcan said, and sat down at one of the tables to take his shoes off, before dropping back to his feet. As his feet met the floor, it was pure bliss. He allowed himself to smile as the warmth spread up through the soles of his feet, all the way to his brain.
"Great, isn't it?" Teddy asked him.
"Fantastic," Lorcan replied fervently, and shuffled over to one of the tables, where two cauldrons were resting. One was red-orange and seemed to glow with heat -- like a radiator, he recalled from Muggle Studies. That must be the warming potion. The other one was Hufflepuff yellow, like sunshine on buttercups.
"What this?" Lorcan pointed to the yellow potion.
Teddy padded over, grinning with every step on the warm surface. "Oh, that's Pleasance. It's a bit like a Cheering Charm, but less of a giddy happiness and more ... peaceful."
"I didn't know Hufflepuffs did drugs."
Teddy looked defensive. "It's not a drug."
"It sounds like a drug to me."
"Well, alright ... but I had to test it, to make sure I brewed it right."
"If you say so," Lorcan smirked, but avoided irritating Teddy. He was rather irritated himself, though -- now he couldn't make a move, as he would be taking advantage. If he was wooing a Slytherin that would be a turn-on, but he doubted that it would impress a Puff.
Although ... if he took some himself, it would be fair, right? He tried to resist the sly grin that he knew was spreading across his face. "Shouldn't you let me test it as well? To be sure?"
Teddy's Pleasance-induced grin faded. "I most certainly should not," he said. "I'm head boy. I can't go around giving drugs to ... to children!"
Lorcan felt his heart drop. "I'm sixteen," he said, doing his best to keep his voice calm and mature.
"You're still underage."
"Oh, come on," Lorcan whined, wishing that Hufflepuffs were less bloody noble and more like regular people. "It won't be fair if it's only you. And in any case, I'm a Slytherin. They can't possibly blame you, Hufflepuff, Head Boy and future saint, for my actions."
Teddy frowned. "I think it's pretty much worn off me anyway," he said shortly.
Damn it! This could very well have ruined everything. Teddy was sitting down now, spreading supplies out on a table, and Lorcan knew he had just missed a perfect chance.
Still ... he could try to patch things up. He sat down next to Teddy, dangerously close on the bench, and leaned closer. Lorcan knew that he smelled masculine, elegant, and very, very gay -- the cologne again. Teddy, however, smelled like woodfires and potions ingredients. Lorcan allowed himself to inhale deeply before speaking.
"I'm sorry," Lorcan said softly. "I shouldn't have --"
"No, I shouldn't have snapped at you," Teddy interrupted him. "Merlin, let's just make some potions, alright?"
"Yes," Lorcan said, with a winningly seductive smile. "How about love potions? I've always wanted to try brewing Amortentia."
"... Let's do poisons."
Lorcan smiled and agreed. Still, eventually they would have to get around to love potions -- and if all went well, by that time Teddy's Amortentia would smell like Lorcan.
Chapter II