Show me the way to the next whiskey bar.... oh don't ask why... oh don't ask why..
Hey gals and gouls...
How are things? Let me catch up....
Dallas: So i left... it was an emergency. I had to. Me and noe were going to cut each others throats. Mainly because he was being a huge asshole. I was being self destructive... massively and that didn't help at all. Albert's sister offered to pay for a bus ticket for me to get away before school started... i accepted and took a 9 hours bus ride to dallas. I met this goth dood on the way up and that was really cool he saved me from being lonely and i had a smoking buddy. He had the whole marilyn manson collection and he was freaking everyone out and that was the best. I had a 20 sack of pot with me on the bus ride up and i was pretty paranoid, i was wish to smoke some on the stops but that was a definate NO. Albert picked me up from the bus station in downtown dallas and we drove around and smoked a fat joint and i was so relaxed to be with him. We got to his place and i grabbed his cordless to let some ppl know i made it okay, i went outside i called noe... no answer... i called my mom... she was at work though... i broke down and cried because i had noone to call to say i got in to dallas okay. So i called Danni and i probably freaked her out cuz i didn't even let her know i was going to dallas. She made me feel better and then i crashed... the first couple of days there i cried every single day. I saw six feet under and i cried. Albert's lil niece Chloe is so awesome but i was so depressed i couldn't even have the nerve to move or smile. Every move i made there was a dark cloud over me. It was awful. His sister made dinner and i would go to Albert's room and cry... why? I have no fucking idea. So i was sad... bottom line. After a couple of days the pot was all gone and my immunity to it was very high.... and it still is. So albert took me out to cure my sadness. I'm not sure in what order everything we did was in i'll just say it as i remember. I know we parked in Deep Ellum and walked inside blocked off streets. We walked and walked and it was ghetto but fun. Lots of people, lots of music. We finally stopped in a bar because my feet were dying. Shitty bar btw, but we needed a drink. We stopped for a few minutes then made our way to the Velvet Hookah. I had a tremendous amount of fun there. Their hookah is so freaking expensive but well worth it because it's so smoothe. I'm not sure what our hookah was named but i know it was a mix of all different things like rose, caramel and strawberry and other things. We sat in the back of this decorated room and i sat on the floor on a pillow and me and Albert watched these 2 hot girls dance for these guys. I got to dance with the hot girl at one point... and then she came closer and we couldn't take our eyes off of her neither could anyone else in the room... the whole room was fixated on this girl. It was wonderful. Finally we took off after our heads were filled with hookah and we were so lightheaded. We then went to steak and shake *rolls eyes* lol and i had a kids meal. The next day we went to Ikea and that place islike the metropolitan museumin NY...lol... we also went to throckhorton mining company (sp?) which is a gay and lesbian bar, we parked near a grocery store and then walked over a couple of streets to get to the place. Cover was free and that was great cuz we got to spend mula on drinks. I felt shitty when we got there and I did not think i was up to dancing. Ha! We were all over that dance floor for over 2 hours. I was jumping around like it was a cyndi lauper concert. It was fantabulous! I was surrounded by tons and tons of gay men with their shirts off. Every move i made i touched sweaty male skin... and the place didn't stink like moody's band hall either. These were clean gay men and i could breathe deep and not choke on polluted air. I loved it. I got to dance with the only girl i saw in the place also. She was asian and cute. She said she was watching me dance with Albert and she said "You so sexy, I copy You. Okay?" Man she was completely drunk and i had to hold her up. She weighed like 2 pds and she wasn't even holding herself up anymore, i was holding her up. LOL... she kept telling me "You so beautiful, you so prettyyyy" That was fun. We stayed till the place closed down and we got to see male prostitues make their sales on the corners streets. On the way home i think we got steak and shake again... lol.
First my psych appointment... on the 29th i went over to MHMR to meet my psych and my case manager for the very first time. I was very nervous because i'm thinking i am going to be there for over an hour and we are going to discuss my condition and different types of medication that i will be taking or that i can be taking if one doesn't work or if i don't like one...whatever... Boy was I WRONG! I got to MHMR right on the dot and asked for my pysch...her name is Dr. Mic. Well they call me to the back after about 10 minutes and as me and Noe are waiting... i am putting together my sketch book that my friend captucueball gave me the idea for. (it came out fabulous btw). I'm compiling all of my sketches i've ever done, well the ones that i still have in my grasp. and placing them all in this sketch book. It looks so nice and neat... perfect actually. So as i'm showing it to Noe this older white man is sitting to my right side against the wall, he's obviously waiting for his pyschiatrist too. Well it seems out of nowwhere that he abruptly jumps up and points at the empty chair that was next to the one that he was siting in and calls it a bitch and mumbles other graphic comments to it and walks away and eyes me and Noe. It was pretty creepy, alot of the people that go to MHMR are really helpless. So minutes later they call me to the back and this guy explains to me that they lost my appointment... i explain that this is the 2nd time that this has happened and i also explain that i just came back from a dallas trip which was an emergency relief and that i need to speak to someone. I had been waiting for a month to meet this pysch anyways and just to start meds. I'm practically begging to see someone and i'm also explaining that i have school the following day. Noe took off when they called me in to get me some double sided tape at walmart, i had to call him back to bring me my composition book that had a paper stating that i had an appointment. By then i'm already crying and my mascara is running down my face. So now i have to wait for Noe to bring me this paper and to show them that they infact set me up for an appointment for that day. So i go wait outside and try to put myself together. As i'm waiting there is this black woman with a baggy t-shirt and sweatpants and a pearl necklace walking back and forth giggling to herself about nothing and then another man throwing rocks at somebody... but there's nobody there.... creepy. I realize that i can't pull myself together watching a grown lady laughing about nothing and a guy throwing stuff at someone who isn't there. Finally, Noe shows up and brings me the paper, i show it to secretary and she confirms that the paper they handed me was infact a scheduled appointment that was never scheduled. She tries to reason with me and asks if i can come the next day but i explain i have class. She tells me to come in the morning before class and that i'll only be there for 10 minutes. Stupid. only 10 minutes? For what? So now i'm thinking i'm going to be rushed and how will i be diagnosed and be prescribed meds if i'm only going to be seen for 10 minutes. Ridiculous.
To be continued.........
How are things? Let me catch up....
Dallas: So i left... it was an emergency. I had to. Me and noe were going to cut each others throats. Mainly because he was being a huge asshole. I was being self destructive... massively and that didn't help at all. Albert's sister offered to pay for a bus ticket for me to get away before school started... i accepted and took a 9 hours bus ride to dallas. I met this goth dood on the way up and that was really cool he saved me from being lonely and i had a smoking buddy. He had the whole marilyn manson collection and he was freaking everyone out and that was the best. I had a 20 sack of pot with me on the bus ride up and i was pretty paranoid, i was wish to smoke some on the stops but that was a definate NO. Albert picked me up from the bus station in downtown dallas and we drove around and smoked a fat joint and i was so relaxed to be with him. We got to his place and i grabbed his cordless to let some ppl know i made it okay, i went outside i called noe... no answer... i called my mom... she was at work though... i broke down and cried because i had noone to call to say i got in to dallas okay. So i called Danni and i probably freaked her out cuz i didn't even let her know i was going to dallas. She made me feel better and then i crashed... the first couple of days there i cried every single day. I saw six feet under and i cried. Albert's lil niece Chloe is so awesome but i was so depressed i couldn't even have the nerve to move or smile. Every move i made there was a dark cloud over me. It was awful. His sister made dinner and i would go to Albert's room and cry... why? I have no fucking idea. So i was sad... bottom line. After a couple of days the pot was all gone and my immunity to it was very high.... and it still is. So albert took me out to cure my sadness. I'm not sure in what order everything we did was in i'll just say it as i remember. I know we parked in Deep Ellum and walked inside blocked off streets. We walked and walked and it was ghetto but fun. Lots of people, lots of music. We finally stopped in a bar because my feet were dying. Shitty bar btw, but we needed a drink. We stopped for a few minutes then made our way to the Velvet Hookah. I had a tremendous amount of fun there. Their hookah is so freaking expensive but well worth it because it's so smoothe. I'm not sure what our hookah was named but i know it was a mix of all different things like rose, caramel and strawberry and other things. We sat in the back of this decorated room and i sat on the floor on a pillow and me and Albert watched these 2 hot girls dance for these guys. I got to dance with the hot girl at one point... and then she came closer and we couldn't take our eyes off of her neither could anyone else in the room... the whole room was fixated on this girl. It was wonderful. Finally we took off after our heads were filled with hookah and we were so lightheaded. We then went to steak and shake *rolls eyes* lol and i had a kids meal. The next day we went to Ikea and that place islike the metropolitan museumin NY...lol... we also went to throckhorton mining company (sp?) which is a gay and lesbian bar, we parked near a grocery store and then walked over a couple of streets to get to the place. Cover was free and that was great cuz we got to spend mula on drinks. I felt shitty when we got there and I did not think i was up to dancing. Ha! We were all over that dance floor for over 2 hours. I was jumping around like it was a cyndi lauper concert. It was fantabulous! I was surrounded by tons and tons of gay men with their shirts off. Every move i made i touched sweaty male skin... and the place didn't stink like moody's band hall either. These were clean gay men and i could breathe deep and not choke on polluted air. I loved it. I got to dance with the only girl i saw in the place also. She was asian and cute. She said she was watching me dance with Albert and she said "You so sexy, I copy You. Okay?" Man she was completely drunk and i had to hold her up. She weighed like 2 pds and she wasn't even holding herself up anymore, i was holding her up. LOL... she kept telling me "You so beautiful, you so prettyyyy" That was fun. We stayed till the place closed down and we got to see male prostitues make their sales on the corners streets. On the way home i think we got steak and shake again... lol.
First my psych appointment... on the 29th i went over to MHMR to meet my psych and my case manager for the very first time. I was very nervous because i'm thinking i am going to be there for over an hour and we are going to discuss my condition and different types of medication that i will be taking or that i can be taking if one doesn't work or if i don't like one...whatever... Boy was I WRONG! I got to MHMR right on the dot and asked for my pysch...her name is Dr. Mic. Well they call me to the back after about 10 minutes and as me and Noe are waiting... i am putting together my sketch book that my friend captucueball gave me the idea for. (it came out fabulous btw). I'm compiling all of my sketches i've ever done, well the ones that i still have in my grasp. and placing them all in this sketch book. It looks so nice and neat... perfect actually. So as i'm showing it to Noe this older white man is sitting to my right side against the wall, he's obviously waiting for his pyschiatrist too. Well it seems out of nowwhere that he abruptly jumps up and points at the empty chair that was next to the one that he was siting in and calls it a bitch and mumbles other graphic comments to it and walks away and eyes me and Noe. It was pretty creepy, alot of the people that go to MHMR are really helpless. So minutes later they call me to the back and this guy explains to me that they lost my appointment... i explain that this is the 2nd time that this has happened and i also explain that i just came back from a dallas trip which was an emergency relief and that i need to speak to someone. I had been waiting for a month to meet this pysch anyways and just to start meds. I'm practically begging to see someone and i'm also explaining that i have school the following day. Noe took off when they called me in to get me some double sided tape at walmart, i had to call him back to bring me my composition book that had a paper stating that i had an appointment. By then i'm already crying and my mascara is running down my face. So now i have to wait for Noe to bring me this paper and to show them that they infact set me up for an appointment for that day. So i go wait outside and try to put myself together. As i'm waiting there is this black woman with a baggy t-shirt and sweatpants and a pearl necklace walking back and forth giggling to herself about nothing and then another man throwing rocks at somebody... but there's nobody there.... creepy. I realize that i can't pull myself together watching a grown lady laughing about nothing and a guy throwing stuff at someone who isn't there. Finally, Noe shows up and brings me the paper, i show it to secretary and she confirms that the paper they handed me was infact a scheduled appointment that was never scheduled. She tries to reason with me and asks if i can come the next day but i explain i have class. She tells me to come in the morning before class and that i'll only be there for 10 minutes. Stupid. only 10 minutes? For what? So now i'm thinking i'm going to be rushed and how will i be diagnosed and be prescribed meds if i'm only going to be seen for 10 minutes. Ridiculous.
To be continued.........