Teardrop on the fire, "Fearless" on my breath
~*~*~*~
Let loose of all my control?
On purpose?
Interesting idea. One that holds more than a little pleasure in the thought. Is this me, or is this Logan rubbing off on me? What is me, under the years and years and layers of self-control and training? I've felt this... thing calling to me before. Has the time come to answer that song?
I don't know what will happen... but soon.
Yes, soon.
Interested in finding out OOCly just what Jean's on about in this public LJ entry? Read the log of a telepathic conversation
X-Men MUCK - Sunday, June 15, 2003, 1:52 PM
-------------------------------------------
[Psi] Logan wonders if telling this Yuriko lady that she needs to re-examine her beliefs is a good thing...
[Psi] Jean pokes her mental head up with a shaking-off of images of molecular chains. << You're thinking rather loudly if you're in-town. Is everything all right? >>
[Psi] Logan chuckles in his mind...<< I hope so...I just gave her a rundown, of all the ways other people have tried to kill me, after she 'casually' mentioned, that she has to kill me to restore her family's honour... >>
[Psi] Jean pauses for a moment, her mind veering off as she processes that information, fails to come up with anything plausible, and settles for asking << Say what? Is this one of those wierd samurai things like out of a bad kung-fu movie? >>
**Time Passes**
[Psi] Jean resurfaces from another drop into concentrating on her molecular bio as she becomes aware that Logan's been pretty quiet. Idly curious and idly concerned, she reaches out to see if he's still on the link, or is lying unconscious in an alley somewhere with stab wounds in patterns of five.
[Psi] Logan smirks, as he head back towards the school, safely on his bike...<< Nah, doc, it's all good. >>
[Psi] Jean settles back into her usual poise at that reassurance. << Oh good. I guess I must've just focused my concentration in too tight and lost you. Although it's wierd. I never used to be able to reach New York without a headache. The Professor will be pleased. So is this some wierd Samurai thing? >>
[Psi] Logan hrms, a subvocal kind of hum, thoughtful in a way. << You okay there? Or did Sabella jiggle with your powers or something, to make it easier?...What, with Yuriko?...I don't know, I guess I'm still alive, 'cause she thinks I know something, and she can't kill an ignorant man, right? >>
[Psi] Jean gives a reassuring mental smile, more a projection of the emotional qualities that such an expression would produce. << Just fine... and I think it happened during the fight for the School. Unless... Hmm. >> Jean falls silent on the link, considering. Her focus spreading out a little, sensory echoes float ghostlike in her psychic absence: the scent of coffe, mixed with the unmistakably biological smell of culture plates.
[Psi] Logan blinks as he finds himself on telepathic hold...<< What's next doc, mental musak?...Wait, never mind..I don't want to have to hum some tune while I'm driving through town...What, when the Proffessor was kidnapped?..You know what happened there or what... >>
[Psi] Jean mentally projects a little Sinatra, tinged with gamine humour, at Logan's query, and remains absent a second longer, just to tease. << Fly me to the moon, and let me swing among the stars... Just kidding. But either the old block on my powers is slipping, or you and I know each other well enough that it's easy for me to pick up on you. Or, demonstratably, you on me. Either or, or possibly both. >>
[Psi] Logan forces himself to listen to the rather loud throb of his bikes engine, well louder that safety regulations would permit for human hearing. The noise is projected over the sounds of Jean's interpretation of Sinatra, long enough for her to stop, before he himself tunes out the engine noise. << So, the question is, if your mental blocks are slipping, and your getting stronger, are you ready for what's hiding behind those blocks?... >>
[Psi] Jean snorts softly at the methods for dealing with her music, commenting that << Well, you have to at least admit that old Frank had style. I'll broadcast Rammstein for you next time. >> as she essays to give herself a little time to answer Logan's question, venting a mental sigh, her presence contracting and growing into a thoughtful little sphere. << I don't know. I can hear it now... I haven't heard it in years. Whispering to me, singing... Sometimes I can touch it. It's so beautiful, so alive... and it scares the hell out of me, whatever it is. >>
[Psi] Logan projects << ...Heard it...heard what?...you trippin' on too many painkillers or what doc? You're starting to make me wonder... >>
[Psi] Jean gives another mental smile, this one distinctly enigmatic, as if Jean's seeing sights that Logan can't, and understands completely why he might be confused. She endeavours to explain. << No, I'm anything but tripping, Logan. It's part of me, tied into my powers somehow. And it was blocked with the rest of them. But it's coming back now. Rachael understands a little, I think. >> This explanation given, Jean's mind once again buzzes idly with a few more molecular equations, before she asks suddenly << What does the Wolverine feel like, to you? >>
[Psi] Logan pauses for a moment, to search his feelings, figuratively, while an image of Logan sitting knelt on the floor, his hands on his knees, wearing a simple asian garment flutters across the mental landscape...<< You mean, like the part of me, that takes control, when I lose it?...It's like my instinct...it takes over, like my autonomous nervous system... >>
[Psi] << Yeah. >> Jean replies simply, remaining mentally indistinct, shapeless in her little glowing sphere that still feels very Jean. << That's exactly it... and that's part of what I can feel in me. See why it scares me? >> Jean, after all, has had Control drummed into her as a litany from practically day one.
[Psi] Logan asks, << You ever thought about just letting go?... >>
[Psi] << Thought about it. >> Jean replies briefly. << But if the power that I can feel waiting is any indication, it would be too dangerous to do it anywhere near the School. When it comes to a choice between curiosity and the safety of others, do you have to wonder what I'm going to pick? >>
[Psi] Logan gives an impression, like an echo, of previous embraces of theirs, and smiles, << You can't hold back the dam for ever doc...you'll have to give in some time. >>
[Psi] Jean's mental presence flickers in a wash of crimsons and oranges at those echoed images, a flush of warmth roiling across it for a moment, before it fades back to the cool blue-white light and the somewhat laconic question of << So what do you think I should do? >>
[Psi] Logan gives a mental 'woah' at the telepathic technicolour display, and then swearing out loud, as he has to swerve back onto his side of the road, to avoid full on contact with an eighteen wheeler...<< Honestly...find someplace deserted, and go there, and just let yourself go, see what happens...I'll go with you, to keep an eye on you. I know you can't really hurt me...much. >>
[Psi] Jean sounds slightly sheepish as the effects of the flare of colours bleed back to her. << Sorry. >> is intoned briefly. << I'm still revelling in having my connection to the world back, I guess. And I'll hold you to that promise, Logan. Know any good, deserted fields in the middle of no-where? >>
[Psi] Logan replies << Of course doc, I wouldn't have offered if I didn't mean it...well, there was Alkali lake...and it was pretty deserted... >>"
[Psi] Jean considers that thoughtfully. Isolated, secret... a long trip there, all alone with Logan... And then, of course, duty and thought for others sneak up and squash that promising line of thought. << Pretty deserted, and also pretty out of the way. I don't know if I could leave for that long without resorting to being kidnapped again. Plus... wasn't there an old dam, there? I don't want to flood towns downstream if whatever this is gets away from me. >>
[Psi] Logan projects << Nah, I wouldn't worry about it Jean, the towns are hundreds of miles away, by the time the water reaches there, it'd be a little stream again...though if your that worried, I'm sure there's countless areas with nothing around to let loose in up there. It's all wildnerness for hundreds of miles around... >>
[Psi] Jean's reply contains elements of the slow grin of a headstrong teenage girl just starting to test her wings, tempered with the experience of a woman. << All right then... pick a place, pick a time, I'll tell the Professor I'm heading out, and we'll go. >>
[Psi] Logan lets out a mental whoo, and chuckles, as he whizzes by the countryside...<< Boy, this sure takes a long time to get back to the mansion..never realized it...Yeah, anywho. Sure, I'll check the map room, make sure to find a good deserted spot, and let you know. >>
Let loose of all my control?
On purpose?
Interesting idea. One that holds more than a little pleasure in the thought. Is this me, or is this Logan rubbing off on me? What is me, under the years and years and layers of self-control and training? I've felt this... thing calling to me before. Has the time come to answer that song?
I don't know what will happen... but soon.
Yes, soon.
Interested in finding out OOCly just what Jean's on about in this public LJ entry? Read the log of a telepathic conversation
X-Men MUCK - Sunday, June 15, 2003, 1:52 PM
-------------------------------------------
[Psi] Logan wonders if telling this Yuriko lady that she needs to re-examine her beliefs is a good thing...
[Psi] Jean pokes her mental head up with a shaking-off of images of molecular chains. << You're thinking rather loudly if you're in-town. Is everything all right? >>
[Psi] Logan chuckles in his mind...<< I hope so...I just gave her a rundown, of all the ways other people have tried to kill me, after she 'casually' mentioned, that she has to kill me to restore her family's honour... >>
[Psi] Jean pauses for a moment, her mind veering off as she processes that information, fails to come up with anything plausible, and settles for asking << Say what? Is this one of those wierd samurai things like out of a bad kung-fu movie? >>
**Time Passes**
[Psi] Jean resurfaces from another drop into concentrating on her molecular bio as she becomes aware that Logan's been pretty quiet. Idly curious and idly concerned, she reaches out to see if he's still on the link, or is lying unconscious in an alley somewhere with stab wounds in patterns of five.
[Psi] Logan smirks, as he head back towards the school, safely on his bike...<< Nah, doc, it's all good. >>
[Psi] Jean settles back into her usual poise at that reassurance. << Oh good. I guess I must've just focused my concentration in too tight and lost you. Although it's wierd. I never used to be able to reach New York without a headache. The Professor will be pleased. So is this some wierd Samurai thing? >>
[Psi] Logan hrms, a subvocal kind of hum, thoughtful in a way. << You okay there? Or did Sabella jiggle with your powers or something, to make it easier?...What, with Yuriko?...I don't know, I guess I'm still alive, 'cause she thinks I know something, and she can't kill an ignorant man, right? >>
[Psi] Jean gives a reassuring mental smile, more a projection of the emotional qualities that such an expression would produce. << Just fine... and I think it happened during the fight for the School. Unless... Hmm. >> Jean falls silent on the link, considering. Her focus spreading out a little, sensory echoes float ghostlike in her psychic absence: the scent of coffe, mixed with the unmistakably biological smell of culture plates.
[Psi] Logan blinks as he finds himself on telepathic hold...<< What's next doc, mental musak?...Wait, never mind..I don't want to have to hum some tune while I'm driving through town...What, when the Proffessor was kidnapped?..You know what happened there or what... >>
[Psi] Jean mentally projects a little Sinatra, tinged with gamine humour, at Logan's query, and remains absent a second longer, just to tease. << Fly me to the moon, and let me swing among the stars... Just kidding. But either the old block on my powers is slipping, or you and I know each other well enough that it's easy for me to pick up on you. Or, demonstratably, you on me. Either or, or possibly both. >>
[Psi] Logan forces himself to listen to the rather loud throb of his bikes engine, well louder that safety regulations would permit for human hearing. The noise is projected over the sounds of Jean's interpretation of Sinatra, long enough for her to stop, before he himself tunes out the engine noise. << So, the question is, if your mental blocks are slipping, and your getting stronger, are you ready for what's hiding behind those blocks?... >>
[Psi] Jean snorts softly at the methods for dealing with her music, commenting that << Well, you have to at least admit that old Frank had style. I'll broadcast Rammstein for you next time. >> as she essays to give herself a little time to answer Logan's question, venting a mental sigh, her presence contracting and growing into a thoughtful little sphere. << I don't know. I can hear it now... I haven't heard it in years. Whispering to me, singing... Sometimes I can touch it. It's so beautiful, so alive... and it scares the hell out of me, whatever it is. >>
[Psi] Logan projects << ...Heard it...heard what?...you trippin' on too many painkillers or what doc? You're starting to make me wonder... >>
[Psi] Jean gives another mental smile, this one distinctly enigmatic, as if Jean's seeing sights that Logan can't, and understands completely why he might be confused. She endeavours to explain. << No, I'm anything but tripping, Logan. It's part of me, tied into my powers somehow. And it was blocked with the rest of them. But it's coming back now. Rachael understands a little, I think. >> This explanation given, Jean's mind once again buzzes idly with a few more molecular equations, before she asks suddenly << What does the Wolverine feel like, to you? >>
[Psi] Logan pauses for a moment, to search his feelings, figuratively, while an image of Logan sitting knelt on the floor, his hands on his knees, wearing a simple asian garment flutters across the mental landscape...<< You mean, like the part of me, that takes control, when I lose it?...It's like my instinct...it takes over, like my autonomous nervous system... >>
[Psi] << Yeah. >> Jean replies simply, remaining mentally indistinct, shapeless in her little glowing sphere that still feels very Jean. << That's exactly it... and that's part of what I can feel in me. See why it scares me? >> Jean, after all, has had Control drummed into her as a litany from practically day one.
[Psi] Logan asks, << You ever thought about just letting go?... >>
[Psi] << Thought about it. >> Jean replies briefly. << But if the power that I can feel waiting is any indication, it would be too dangerous to do it anywhere near the School. When it comes to a choice between curiosity and the safety of others, do you have to wonder what I'm going to pick? >>
[Psi] Logan gives an impression, like an echo, of previous embraces of theirs, and smiles, << You can't hold back the dam for ever doc...you'll have to give in some time. >>
[Psi] Jean's mental presence flickers in a wash of crimsons and oranges at those echoed images, a flush of warmth roiling across it for a moment, before it fades back to the cool blue-white light and the somewhat laconic question of << So what do you think I should do? >>
[Psi] Logan gives a mental 'woah' at the telepathic technicolour display, and then swearing out loud, as he has to swerve back onto his side of the road, to avoid full on contact with an eighteen wheeler...<< Honestly...find someplace deserted, and go there, and just let yourself go, see what happens...I'll go with you, to keep an eye on you. I know you can't really hurt me...much. >>
[Psi] Jean sounds slightly sheepish as the effects of the flare of colours bleed back to her. << Sorry. >> is intoned briefly. << I'm still revelling in having my connection to the world back, I guess. And I'll hold you to that promise, Logan. Know any good, deserted fields in the middle of no-where? >>
[Psi] Logan replies << Of course doc, I wouldn't have offered if I didn't mean it...well, there was Alkali lake...and it was pretty deserted... >>"
[Psi] Jean considers that thoughtfully. Isolated, secret... a long trip there, all alone with Logan... And then, of course, duty and thought for others sneak up and squash that promising line of thought. << Pretty deserted, and also pretty out of the way. I don't know if I could leave for that long without resorting to being kidnapped again. Plus... wasn't there an old dam, there? I don't want to flood towns downstream if whatever this is gets away from me. >>
[Psi] Logan projects << Nah, I wouldn't worry about it Jean, the towns are hundreds of miles away, by the time the water reaches there, it'd be a little stream again...though if your that worried, I'm sure there's countless areas with nothing around to let loose in up there. It's all wildnerness for hundreds of miles around... >>
[Psi] Jean's reply contains elements of the slow grin of a headstrong teenage girl just starting to test her wings, tempered with the experience of a woman. << All right then... pick a place, pick a time, I'll tell the Professor I'm heading out, and we'll go. >>
[Psi] Logan lets out a mental whoo, and chuckles, as he whizzes by the countryside...<< Boy, this sure takes a long time to get back to the mansion..never realized it...Yeah, anywho. Sure, I'll check the map room, make sure to find a good deserted spot, and let you know. >>