I know, I don't think I could be any more vague. It is more like a case of a little bit at a time so that you don't notice the change until you are in the middle of a temper tantrum at the age of 32. I don't know if anyone from OT could help, part of the problem is, I am still a nice person, still giving blah blah. I have just come to expect a lot from Ron. And not on purpose like I think he owes me, he has just spent the last five+ years bending to my my every want and need that I can't tell when I am being unreasonable or ungrateful anymore. Sad I know. But like I said I have begun to rationalize/justify my demands, and I am still a nice person, and I generally want things would (in a round about way) benefit more than just me(ie: Wednesday) so my brain says I SHOULD have it. I always have trouble around this time of year, after being cooped up for the winter my brain starts playing tricks on me, combine that with things like living in the country, pms and non stop fucking rain, things get kind of emo around me. But I am serious about dropping the spoiled brat bit, I am just not sure how quite yet...
I get cabin fever from march / april too, like literally to the point of near complete shutdown. You're lucky you have someone to throw a temper tantrum at ;) And the fact that you're lookin at this in the way that you are is a good sign.
Don't be too hard on yourself! Ungrateful / spoiled brat aren't pleasant labels to assign yourself. They're always good factors to consider when thinking something through (like the quick self-check 'Am I being loud and obnoxious' while drinking at a party) but I wouldn't be too quick to put them down as inherent flaws in your personality that will affect all your wants/needs from the beginning.
I can't believe you didn't even snicker at the emo bit, especially here on my super-emo journal! So, does the fact that we are checking ourselves before we are wrecking ourselves mean...we're growing up? Growing old? Or just me? I turn 33 this summer ugh. p.s Thanks for being in my corner
I don't know if anyone from OT could help, part of the problem is, I am still a nice person, still giving blah blah. I have just come to expect a lot from Ron. And not on purpose like I think he owes me, he has just spent the last five+ years bending to my my every want and need that I can't tell when I am being unreasonable or ungrateful anymore. Sad I know.
But like I said I have begun to rationalize/justify my demands, and I am still a nice person, and I generally want things would (in a round about way) benefit more than just me(ie: Wednesday) so my brain says I SHOULD have it.
I always have trouble around this time of year, after being cooped up for the winter my brain starts playing tricks on me, combine that with things like living in the country, pms and non stop fucking rain, things get kind of emo around me.
But I am serious about dropping the spoiled brat bit, I am just not sure how quite yet...
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Don't be too hard on yourself! Ungrateful / spoiled brat aren't pleasant labels to assign yourself. They're always good factors to consider when thinking something through (like the quick self-check 'Am I being loud and obnoxious' while drinking at a party) but I wouldn't be too quick to put them down as inherent flaws in your personality that will affect all your wants/needs from the beginning.
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So, does the fact that we are checking ourselves before we are wrecking ourselves mean...we're growing up? Growing old? Or just me? I turn 33 this summer ugh.
p.s Thanks for being in my corner
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