Time for a change.
It is time for a change.. I am sick of the same old shit going on.
When Aug/Sept rolls around, I will no longer be living in the great state of Arizona. I have decided I am young, single, and have nothing here to hold me back from moving on to see what else is out there. I have lived here my whole life, and in all honesty.. I am terrified to leave. But, I want to know what the world has, and I want to know if I can make it on my own. Yes, I will have help on the way thanks to some close friends, but this will be the end for Arizona. For now. Who knows, I might come back in a month, a year, or maybe 10 years. For now, its off to Austin, TX... Then after that... I really havent decided.
I really dont know what to expect.
Other then that... I just found out both my registration and insurace expired.. And I dont have the finances to pay it off.. Yay... So no driving around for Noelle anymore.
Fuck.
I realized a couple things about the scene this past weekend. While I was at the party, observing the people around me, I realized there is nothing here for me anymore other then the music. Yes, there are those people that are like family to me. I just get the feeling I am out of place when I go to parties now. Nothing seems the same anymore. Everything is so different. I dont think I can explain the way I feel about it other then the fact its not a great feeling. I love the music... I used to love the people... The vibe... But everything is just so "off". I think a break from parties will help me none the least. After this weekend.. Dont expect me to show for a long time, if ever again while I am still here.
It is time for me to make a change. Things are not working out the way they should. Yes, I know... The good things in life do not always come so easy... But its those good things I am not searching for... It's pure satisfaction that I want... Satisfaction knowing that I am OK... Even if I may be broke, helpless, unsure of the coming months/years ahead of me. I just want things to be gratifying in some way.
Well... I am doing nothing but rambling on and on.. SO I will shut up now.