Just close your eyes and ignore the dark that troubles you most
FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Alyssa REALLY knows how to fuck herself over and now she is like completely numb to everything going on around her and she just wants to go the fuck away and stay there for a while.
On a lighter note, this past weekend was pretty fun, well I mean, I haven't exactly talked to Jaime in a good couple of days now nor have I seen him which has been killing me because I love him to death and he takes such good care of me and he genuinely loves and cares for me, but stupid me had to go and be stupid AGAIN and thus he broke up with me which he should've done a long long long long long long long long LONG mother fuckin time ago because he deserves someone like infinity times better than me because I SUCK AT BEING A GIRLFRIEND and I don't wanna hear anything about things getting better and all that comforting shit because honestly I deserve to feel this way right now, I haven't been trying my hardest at doing anything for quite sometime now and here I am stuck in the fuckin hole I dug myself. So I shall deal with the consequences on my own.
Okay so really on a lighter note, this past weekend was pretty fun because I had LISA who is quite possibly my favoritest person and friend in the world right now with me to help me get through the weekend, honestly she is like one of the most amazing people in this world, I don't understand how she does it, but she's just an amazing friend that can relate to me and understand me on so many levels but also call me on my shit and also let me know when other people around me are being like fucking poison to me. So FRIDAY NIGHT she picked me up and we went by our Jamba Juice for some energy shots woot woot. And then we went to La Cafepia to see MY MACHETE Jessica and Dereks' band play [I say Jessica and Derek's band cuz they're great friends of mine and I forget the rest of the guys in the bands names...well I know Jessica Derek and Kyle, I forget the other guy, sorry guy I'll work on it] so we got there as they were setting up and saw all of Jessica and Derek's family who I'm pretty close to by now I mean...I've known them for like 6 years now so yeah it was great seeing the family and also Jessica and Derek and other friends like Peggy and her cousin? and Brennan Billy and Omar, good times, introduced Lisa to like everyone, their set was soooooo good I loved the songs and music and just everything, but their were a few problems with the amps which sucked. After they played Lisa and I headed over to Sonic Burgers and got Slushies OMG Lisa and I were laughing so fucking hard and joking around so much while we waited to get our slushies at Sonic oh man, fucking hilarious, and then went back to pick Jessica, Peggy, and Peggy's cousin girl? up and then we took off to Kyle's house for the after party, I was kinda out of it though, I think Lisa was too, there was so much alcohol, I kinda regret not drinking at least a little now, but whateva. I wasn't up for it then but now I am. Eh, then after a little while Lisa and I took off, and went to another party but saw nothing but GANGSTERS crowding the door when we got there so we drove by like 4 times laughing and then took off, went to eat at Wendy's and then called it a night.
SATURDAY I got home from shopping with my dad and then my mom told me Yvett called which was SOOOO unexpected cuz I haven't talked to my lovah in like 8 months or so! My Twin lovah ahhh so I called her and we made plans to go shopping and then hang out at my house til Lisa picked us up for the party later at night, so I picked Yvett up, we went to the mall and walked around and caught up with each other, joked around as usual, and then got some awesome shirts at Wet Seal, came back to my house, my mommy order lunch from Pat and Oscars for us so we went and picked that up, ate it, got full, took lots of pictures, got ready for the party, then around 8 Lisa came and picked us up and off we went to the party for Lisa's friend Jason, got there early so went off while Lisa gave us a tour of her old neighborhood, then we stopped by her friend Tatiana's house and hung out there for a while, convinced her to come with us to the party, back to the party around 10 went inside and there were a bunch of Bro's and Bro Ho's and some fuckin scene bitches we were gonna fight with but didn't cuz those bitches got scared and took off HAHA BITCHESSSSSS. Anyways saw some band play, met some people, Jenn, Tina, Lalo, and Weenie showed up, so did Brenna, Santiago, Jimmy, and Jaime [not my Jaime, but another one] we all talked for a while then Brenna and them took off, Lisa, Yvett, Jenn, Weenie, Tati, and I just hung out in the living room at the house cuz the police came and were breaking up the party in the backyard and the front but we were all just hanging out in the living room and met a gangsta we nicknamed Spots who was HILARIOUS, then after a while Tina came back to pick up Jenn and Weenie, so then Lisa, Yvett, Tati and I left, dropped Tati off then Yvett, then me and Lisa went to get a late night snack from Carls but nooooo they didnt accept debit card that late after we already fuckin order like a million things and we only had like 10 bucks cash on us, sooooooo we laughed and then Lisa dropped me off at home and I called it a night.
UGH THIS WEEKS GONNA SUCK
I'm so mad at myself
but hey I got A LOT of homework done with all the free time I had today.
but still, I feel so bored and lonely throughout the day. Meh, I brought this upon myself so I just have to suck it up and deal with it on my own.
WORK
Tomorrow [Tuesday] 6am-12pm free after
wednesday-off free allll day
thursday-off free all day
friday-6am-1pm, free after
saturday PARTYYYYYYY IN THA OC
sunday church then free after 2
oh boy looks like I'm gonna have to find some stuff to do to keep myself sane. anyone wanna hang out let me know!
<3
Alyssa REALLY knows how to fuck herself over and now she is like completely numb to everything going on around her and she just wants to go the fuck away and stay there for a while.
On a lighter note, this past weekend was pretty fun, well I mean, I haven't exactly talked to Jaime in a good couple of days now nor have I seen him which has been killing me because I love him to death and he takes such good care of me and he genuinely loves and cares for me, but stupid me had to go and be stupid AGAIN and thus he broke up with me which he should've done a long long long long long long long long LONG mother fuckin time ago because he deserves someone like infinity times better than me because I SUCK AT BEING A GIRLFRIEND and I don't wanna hear anything about things getting better and all that comforting shit because honestly I deserve to feel this way right now, I haven't been trying my hardest at doing anything for quite sometime now and here I am stuck in the fuckin hole I dug myself. So I shall deal with the consequences on my own.
Okay so really on a lighter note, this past weekend was pretty fun because I had LISA who is quite possibly my favoritest person and friend in the world right now with me to help me get through the weekend, honestly she is like one of the most amazing people in this world, I don't understand how she does it, but she's just an amazing friend that can relate to me and understand me on so many levels but also call me on my shit and also let me know when other people around me are being like fucking poison to me. So FRIDAY NIGHT she picked me up and we went by our Jamba Juice for some energy shots woot woot. And then we went to La Cafepia to see MY MACHETE Jessica and Dereks' band play [I say Jessica and Derek's band cuz they're great friends of mine and I forget the rest of the guys in the bands names...well I know Jessica Derek and Kyle, I forget the other guy, sorry guy I'll work on it] so we got there as they were setting up and saw all of Jessica and Derek's family who I'm pretty close to by now I mean...I've known them for like 6 years now so yeah it was great seeing the family and also Jessica and Derek and other friends like Peggy and her cousin? and Brennan Billy and Omar, good times, introduced Lisa to like everyone, their set was soooooo good I loved the songs and music and just everything, but their were a few problems with the amps which sucked. After they played Lisa and I headed over to Sonic Burgers and got Slushies OMG Lisa and I were laughing so fucking hard and joking around so much while we waited to get our slushies at Sonic oh man, fucking hilarious, and then went back to pick Jessica, Peggy, and Peggy's cousin girl? up and then we took off to Kyle's house for the after party, I was kinda out of it though, I think Lisa was too, there was so much alcohol, I kinda regret not drinking at least a little now, but whateva. I wasn't up for it then but now I am. Eh, then after a little while Lisa and I took off, and went to another party but saw nothing but GANGSTERS crowding the door when we got there so we drove by like 4 times laughing and then took off, went to eat at Wendy's and then called it a night.
SATURDAY I got home from shopping with my dad and then my mom told me Yvett called which was SOOOO unexpected cuz I haven't talked to my lovah in like 8 months or so! My Twin lovah ahhh so I called her and we made plans to go shopping and then hang out at my house til Lisa picked us up for the party later at night, so I picked Yvett up, we went to the mall and walked around and caught up with each other, joked around as usual, and then got some awesome shirts at Wet Seal, came back to my house, my mommy order lunch from Pat and Oscars for us so we went and picked that up, ate it, got full, took lots of pictures, got ready for the party, then around 8 Lisa came and picked us up and off we went to the party for Lisa's friend Jason, got there early so went off while Lisa gave us a tour of her old neighborhood, then we stopped by her friend Tatiana's house and hung out there for a while, convinced her to come with us to the party, back to the party around 10 went inside and there were a bunch of Bro's and Bro Ho's and some fuckin scene bitches we were gonna fight with but didn't cuz those bitches got scared and took off HAHA BITCHESSSSSS. Anyways saw some band play, met some people, Jenn, Tina, Lalo, and Weenie showed up, so did Brenna, Santiago, Jimmy, and Jaime [not my Jaime, but another one] we all talked for a while then Brenna and them took off, Lisa, Yvett, Jenn, Weenie, Tati, and I just hung out in the living room at the house cuz the police came and were breaking up the party in the backyard and the front but we were all just hanging out in the living room and met a gangsta we nicknamed Spots who was HILARIOUS, then after a while Tina came back to pick up Jenn and Weenie, so then Lisa, Yvett, Tati and I left, dropped Tati off then Yvett, then me and Lisa went to get a late night snack from Carls but nooooo they didnt accept debit card that late after we already fuckin order like a million things and we only had like 10 bucks cash on us, sooooooo we laughed and then Lisa dropped me off at home and I called it a night.
UGH THIS WEEKS GONNA SUCK
I'm so mad at myself
but hey I got A LOT of homework done with all the free time I had today.
but still, I feel so bored and lonely throughout the day. Meh, I brought this upon myself so I just have to suck it up and deal with it on my own.
WORK
Tomorrow [Tuesday] 6am-12pm free after
wednesday-off free allll day
thursday-off free all day
friday-6am-1pm, free after
saturday PARTYYYYYYY IN THA OC
sunday church then free after 2
oh boy looks like I'm gonna have to find some stuff to do to keep myself sane. anyone wanna hang out let me know!
<3