one of the most tragic moments of my life...
today i went to my grandmas funeral. it was earth shattering and very sad. mother was literaly pulling me to her casket for me to say goodbye. i told her i could not do that because i cannot handle seeing her in that state. i did look at the pin she was wearing... it was a present me and my brother gave to her when we were really little. it was a heart shaped locket pin with a picture of me and my brother in it. it makes me happy to know that that locket will be next to her heart for ever. everyone was singing jesus songs and prayers, which i did not know a single one. heh. we all drove to the cemetary on river road for the burrial. my pot head hippy uncle played Amazing Grace on his saxophone. beautiful. everyone threw a flower on the casket that was 6 feet into the ground. everyone went to their cars to leave, which then i said my last goodbye. the funeral was very sad, and crying made me feel rediculous. it didnt help much when people kept hugging me and asking if i was going to be okay. when i saw her name on the tombstone, i couldnt believe it. i didnt think that that was my grandma. it couldnt be. we always see our loved ones alive and never think of when they will die. we should never take things for granted. we should spend more time with our older relatives while we can...
emotional and mental pain is definately far more worse than physical pain. i have 2 very emotional moments in my life so far that will effect me forever.........
rest in peace grandma <3