(no subject)
I've been looking back on my life a lot lately, and thinking about how grateful I am where I am now. Out of each of those horrible and miserable times in my life, I gained something: strength.
All those years of wandering from house to house in South Park, one of the bad areas of Beaumont, TX, as a crackhead. And, yes, I'll let it out here, since it IS LJ, the years of shooting coke, heroin and meth. And we won't even get into the shit I was doing when I was 15.
All of that game to an end on Christmas Day, 2008. And I can't say how great I feel about it. I don't feel useless, and I have noticed my creativity and concentration boots considerably. I also enjoy life, for all of its many things. I feel as I have healed. And it is a wonderful feeling.
I still speak to some of those I used to use with, and it breaks my heart to know that they are still in that void, that lapse of reason. I still love them, and will be their friends, but when it comes to hanging out sometime, it would have to depend on the conditions. I just pray that I don't relapse, and I'm going to keep working hard at it. I also do not miss the drugs at all. I can't say I ever have a time where I crave something.
I'm going to get more active on LJ. I want to share my thoughts again.
All those years of wandering from house to house in South Park, one of the bad areas of Beaumont, TX, as a crackhead. And, yes, I'll let it out here, since it IS LJ, the years of shooting coke, heroin and meth. And we won't even get into the shit I was doing when I was 15.
All of that game to an end on Christmas Day, 2008. And I can't say how great I feel about it. I don't feel useless, and I have noticed my creativity and concentration boots considerably. I also enjoy life, for all of its many things. I feel as I have healed. And it is a wonderful feeling.
I still speak to some of those I used to use with, and it breaks my heart to know that they are still in that void, that lapse of reason. I still love them, and will be their friends, but when it comes to hanging out sometime, it would have to depend on the conditions. I just pray that I don't relapse, and I'm going to keep working hard at it. I also do not miss the drugs at all. I can't say I ever have a time where I crave something.
I'm going to get more active on LJ. I want to share my thoughts again.