A mark to end all marks
Who knew that El would have it in her to leave a huge hickey on the side of my neck? She's becoming quite the vicious one, and I love it! I was shittin' bricks when she seen the fuckin mark Todd left on my neck. I had this huge coverup, and she made it so much easier by askin' if she did it! I'm kinda upset that I couldn't stay over there longer today. I think I'm coming down with a stomach virus. As soon as I ate the chicken soup, and we started makin out, I got flashbacks of the night at Sinners Paradise.. It really freaked me the fuck out.I got so nausiuated.
She let me lay in bed for a little bit, but I got up and left, thinkin' maybe I should sleep in my bed so I don't get her sick. So I left and stuff.
I stopped at the book store for some self help books. Its gettin' kinda hard to stop thinkin about what happened the other night wanting to have a drink. I'm trying really hard to not drink and shit. I know Manny is pissed off at me, and I really am trying to make an effort, even if she's done with me and the whole situation. I don't blame her, really I don't.
I know I'm straight, but, I feel like there are so many questions now. I kind of liked what happened, but.. I'm straight!! Right? These books that I bought are kinda insightful, but they really don't explain anything to me. I'm fucked. I can't be gay, and I'm not bi. What the hell?!?
I can't tell anyone about this. Todd seems like he's fucking tantilizing me, it's driving me insane. He said I should stop worrying about it, but come on! If a straight guy gets to third base with another guy, while totally fucked up outta his gourd, he's gonna be uptight!! No one can know. NO ONE..
El, I love you.
She let me lay in bed for a little bit, but I got up and left, thinkin' maybe I should sleep in my bed so I don't get her sick. So I left and stuff.
I stopped at the book store for some self help books. Its gettin' kinda hard to stop thinkin about what happened the other night wanting to have a drink. I'm trying really hard to not drink and shit. I know Manny is pissed off at me, and I really am trying to make an effort, even if she's done with me and the whole situation. I don't blame her, really I don't.
I know I'm straight, but, I feel like there are so many questions now. I kind of liked what happened, but.. I'm straight!! Right? These books that I bought are kinda insightful, but they really don't explain anything to me. I'm fucked. I can't be gay, and I'm not bi. What the hell?!?
I can't tell anyone about this. Todd seems like he's fucking tantilizing me, it's driving me insane. He said I should stop worrying about it, but come on! If a straight guy gets to third base with another guy, while totally fucked up outta his gourd, he's gonna be uptight!! No one can know. NO ONE..
El, I love you.